This is my sleep paralysis demon

>>935851279 (OP)
sleep paralysis: weakness

allowing yourself to be a weirdo

almost always a product of a bored and lazy mind, with WAAAYYY too much time on his hands

also associated with histrionic behavior

>>935851279 (OP)
i never had sleep paralysis. how does it feel?

>>935851279 (OP)

H O W E V E R :

cats indeed CAN and WILL make you experience a certain form of sleep paralysis onset...

And I'm not joking when I say CATS HAVE THE ABILITY TO OVERPOWER YOUR MIND...

they definitely READ OUR MINDS...
our words are interpreted through the emotional sound of the syllables, but the cats are actually READING YOUR MIND while you're talking

there's not even any question about that

animals definitely read your mind
to a certain degree...
absolutely....

But cats have a special power
I've seen it and experienced it first hand many many many many times

I've had cats lay on me and
somehow...
PUT ME TO SLEEP

or should I say....
PUT ME INTO SLEEP PARALYSIS ONSET

>>935851279 (OP)

I've worked specifically with cats my entire life.... well... ever since I was 11...
that was a long LONG time ago

and I've studied cats VERY CLOSELY
I've taken hundreds of LSD trips with cats
(we had 36 cats at one point)

and I can absolutely GUARANTEE
cats read your mind
its apparently natural for animals
WE are the animals who lost the ability

or perhaps logic itself is the barrier that humans have constructed between ourselves and the natural ability to telepathically read other living things minds

to know what they're thinking...

because I've seen hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of examples with obviously the cats knew exactly what I was thinking, and my spoken words were interpreted as nothing more than 'an envelope', The tone of which indicates emotional range, but they are interpreting imagery from your MIND

and cats DO have the ability to 'override' our minds, somehow hypnotizing you and putting you into a state of somewhat sleep paralysis.. That would be a good way to describe it.

suddenly you realize you almost fell asleep but you were kind of frozen in place while the cat sat on your lap looking at you.

they are very aware when they're doing it...

cats can LULL you with their mind

>>935851408
>>935851554
WOW MUCH random CAPITALIZATION FOR EMPHASIS it must BE true

>>935851279 (OP)
by the way....

I LOVE THAT FUCKING PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!

seriously, dude .. pay attention:
I AM THE BIGGEST FUCKING FAN OF YOUR PICTURE ON THIS ENTIRE PLANET!!!

If you knew me, you would understand

I haven't even checked to see if it's something you pulled off the internet yet, or if it's an actual photograph you took

I guess it doesn't really matter

BECAUSE I ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LOVE THAT PICTURE!!!

The cat is so fucking beautiful. The angle is perfect. It's so trippy

cats are trippy as shit

remember I told you I've taken LSD around my cats hundreds of times? That was back in the old days when LSD was 100% real... The old school four-way window pane orange sunshine Days remember?

well, It turns out cats serotonin levels keep them in a continual state of somewhat 'LSD tripping'

It's true.... The Way cat's brain chemistry is arranged, they are in a continual state of tripping

no shit...

It explains a lot...
In fact, every time we would do LSD, all of the cats suddenly looked at us differently like "NOW YOU'RE IN OUR WORLD"

no shit... If you stop and think about it, It explains a lot about their beautiful idiosyncrasies and unique traits

they are definitely THE MOST SUPERIOR FORM OF LIFE I'VE EVER SEEN

which is exactly why I love this picture and I'm downloading it now

>>935851683

.... listen, Wechsler Wannabe......

............ I am a professional.............
................... illustrator .....................

And I paint with words as well, fuck face

..............And I'll type
..............any way
..............I feel
..............like typing

If it gets under your skin
OBVIOUSLY I'M DOING SOMETHING RIGHT

the day they allow italics or bold lettering in here for emphasis, I will ARTISTICALLY EXPRESS EMPHASIS any fucking way I feel like expressing it...

If you've got a problem with it, you need to take a number and get to the back of the line

because I've been doing this since before you were born, bitch.. And you're definitely not the first thin-skinned sissy that I've irritated

>>935851687
Thanks, she's my cat

>>935851279 (OP)
........wanna hear a great story?

....... how about an amazing experiment?
what if the experiment was accidental?
unintentional, yet an experiment nonetheless?

100% TRUE:
my brother used to have a black cat named LUCKY... and lucky was cool as fuck!! of course.. He was a cat

my brother was moving out into his own apartment, and he moved his furniture to this new apartment and left lucky at Mom's house while he moved his stuff.

Lucky vanished that night.....

The next morning my brother woke up in his new apartment, got ready to come back to Mom's house, He opened the front door of his new apartment THERE WAS LUCKY SITTING EGYPTIAN STYLE. LOOKING AT HIM

Lucky had never been to that apartment before... He had traveled there INSTINCTUALLY...

But here's the weirdest part:
This was Buckhead in Atlanta
and he had to cross several MAJOR roadways, Peachtree Street, Weiuca Road, Piedmont Road, and Roswell Road.

each of those is a guaranteed death trap for any animal, because you really have to understand Atlanta traffic...

having never been there before, lucky somehow navigated his way to my brother

.. lol My brother was coming back to Mom's place to pick up Lucky and bring him there... But LUCKY CAME THERE ALL HIS OWN

they definitely possess instinctual 'telepathic' abilities... what humans would consider supernatural

is actually completely natural for them

>>935851995
omg she's gorgeous!!

>>935851995

by the way, this handsome sonofabitch is named SEXY BOOM BOOM

my wife's cat....
or should I say she's his human
they have a bond that cannot be explained in words... it's almost scary

seriously..... it's almost unnerving, how CONNECTED he is with her, and vice versa... their bond transcends anything I've seen before between two living things. it's impossible to explain fully in words... you'd really have to see it in person to understand..

similarly, it's impossible to explain exactly HOW SMART Sexy is.... let it suffice to say I've worked with hundreds of cats (my family has done animal rescue stuff ever since I was a kid) and 8 have studied cats EXTENSIVELY.... that's an understatement

but Sexy is THE SMARTEST FUCKING CAT IVE EVER SEEN.... absolutely THE most intelligent motherfucking cat EVER...

EVER..... he's a special gift from the universe.. I always joke about how it's like the movie ET, how it's like we have a mysterious magical alien Buddha hiding in our house, and the rest of the world operates, oblivious to the secret happening behind the closed door

And I'm not joking... He's that unusual

not even exaggerating....
he's like an ALIEN BUDDHA....
he is SO goddamn smart
and because he's so smart
he expresses his love more dynamically
more enthusiastically
he's VERY INVOLVED in everything we do
understand?

we have 5 rescue cats that we simply couldn't imagine adopting out ... and the other 4 are amazing, of course, because they're CATS.... and cats ARE amazing

.................but Sexy is NOT like the others

he functions on a much higher level

he was also THE most complicated, impossible, troublesome, arduous rescue my wife or I ever dealt with

long story.... but it took months to finally complete the rescue, in which we finally saved him from an asshole landlord type faggot who poisoned Sexy.. and I'm talking about POISONED HIM BAD

BAD.......
REAL BAD

he almost died... but the poisoned also made him lose the trust we had built with him, so our 'big rescue' was scratched again. we had brought the Hav-a-Hart™ trap again, but we had to scratch it again because he wouldn't let us anywhere near him, even though he was on deaths doorstep.

after poisoning him, somehow that asshole managed to BREAK SEXY'S LEG

anyway...
we finally got him.....
but if you only knew how hard it was
you'd realize rescuing him at all was a miracle in the first place

EVERYTHING was working against us
over and over and over again
something kept trying to prevent us

I've been studying cats for 50 years

and I've NEVER met a motherfucking cat like Sexy Boom Boom

and YES.......
YES....
Sexy has sat on my chest before
or my lap
or even right next to me on the sofa

and put me into an 8nvoluntary state of hypnotic 'sleep paralysis'

absolutely yes .....

>>935852778
Hey, I just want to say again that I appreciate your posts and how you encouraged me to think of ways to deal with cats and my allergies. I had some bad moods in some of the threads but I know it's all water under the bridge.

>>935851360
Like there's someone else in the bedroom and you can't move. You keep trying to wake up and defend yourself but you can't.

>>935851554
>I've taken hundreds of LSD trips with cats
>we had 36 cats
>and I can absolutely GUARANTEE cats read your mind

>>935855280
Hello fellow HUMANS this is a real human talking and you should LISTEN to him and maybe get in a CAR with him, fellow human. Maybe he can get you some cats and give advice on how to take care of them, using his healthy HUMAN brain which is clearly DEVOID of all parasites.

>>935851350
you're so uptight, relax a little.

I'm the highway