>be me
>be le redditor
>drafted into ww3
>ohshit
>be told because of my mental and physical attributes, I am being assigned to “special duties division”
>specialforcesfuckyeah
>go through special forces basic, I must be so good because it’s so easy
>get assigned to sniper, have to get special implant
>cyborghellye
>go under surgery, awake a day later and given special protein chicken tendies
>get deployed a month later
>be in Ukraine, sat atop building
>see poor russian conscript nearby below, get an idea
>jump off building spinning screaming “360 NO SCOOOPPEEE”
>completely miss shot and break both legs on landing
>look up, building was five stories high
>look down, get shot dead by russian conscript
>be russian conscript
>big fat ugly american jumps off building screaming something about a scope
>shoots and completely misses, breaks legs and screams in agony
>shoot him to put him out of his misery
>the fat fuck explodes
>dying in street, everything goes to black
>wake up in back of wooden cart
>hear voice
>”Hey, you! You’re finally awake?”
>Comrade Howard you’ve done it again

how’s the war going for you guys?

>>938095766 (OP)
nice wall of text you damn nigger

>>938095766 (OP)
i can't wait for the great war I want to kill some civilians so bad I'm gonna commit so many war crimes you don't even know LETS FUCKING GOOOOO

i am going to murk some kids like a jew in palestine when ww3 hits

>>938095963
NO RUSSIAN

>>938097274
This is too bizarre