>>22909651 (OP)Go on for a run, specifically in a park.
Make sure to take paper and a pencil with you too, find a bench at a place where is mostly empty and seat there.
Write everything that is happening to you, why it is happening, how it came to that and why you feel the way you fell, make sure to reflect on why you react the way you do.
Read what you wrote and write again if something else pops up
Repeat and repeat.
Go back home
Read once more at last and try to write "how would i fix this"
And then try that.