thinking about an earth centric sandbox fantasy world

Why was your thread deleted

They probably think you’re spamming

>>22915138
because it was a frog probably

>>22915140
Yeah that’s what I was thinking

Anyway this song is stuck in my head
https://youtu.be/rtkTtqpRL-c

going about reorganizing my fantasy movie list

narnia was kinoino

I think I’m probably not focusing on the present enough these days like I think it’s really holding me back it’s not entirely my fault because I think it’s situational somewhat which leads me to dwelling a little bit it’s an extremely I guess trying situation to be in so I’m not sure what’s normal anymore it’s sort of been thrown out the window

That quite really helps me feel better “let the past die” I’m not sure if it’s the saying or if forcing myself to be in the present really helps like I’m really forcing myself with great energy.

But I find that when I feel like I’m getting stuck in the past and I try to focus on the present a lot of the time I end up just feeling a lot of anger, so much that it seems like anger is a regular part of my existence I do get sad but to get myself out of feeling down or overwhelmed with sadness I end up feeling anger instead
but it helps me keep motivated I think

I don’t think forgiveness really helps, whoever came up with that never felt pain all the way in their bones kind of thing, they haven’t had to endure a lifetime of anguish and needless suffering though it’s kind of a state of mind maybe in some instances? It’s hard to be sure. But that’s dwelling again and uh then if I try to ignore that I just feel angry

Obviously that’s the problem, so I think I’m correct in my assertion.

I want to try and stop being so analytical because it starts to make me feel like a robot almost and half human, not quite fully alive.

“It’s time to let old things die” I think this has multiple meanings but instead of spending all this time analyzing things that somehow act to almost keep a person stuck or involved with the past in some way I think instead maybe it’s better to be a part of new things or to look for novel and new experiences because I think that somehow more renewing and less draining and also more in line with my nature maybe.


The only problem I’ve run into, with all this stuff, I think it stems from eastern philosophy most notably Buddhism and god damnit, I don’t think I can just fully live in the present moment. I have a lot of qualms with all that shit.

For one I’ve needed to think just to survive I think. This brings me to two major issues I have. I think I’ve just been spending too much time analyzing shit, I need more variety and novelty in my life but I’m just so used to being poor. That’s basically scared me too, just being as poor as I have been.

Anyway, I think I still have remnants of what could be “giftedness” I have unusual traits that I think are often associated with like genius and giftedness so like I said it makes me seem really unusual.

It’s hard for me not think, I think this seems highly unusual to a lot of people because what I’ve gathered is that it’s not normal to have to think so much most people’s optimal or default state is to not think at all. Which is good to know I guess.

I’m not sure if I can just enjoy life that easily, and not only that I don’t know for sure what enjoyment really is or looks like. I am a man of relatively simple means, I am not sure what this is basically I’m not sure what it is entirely I’m just too damaged or something to easily enjoy life maybe you could say maybe that I’m too wild or something, but deep down I’m not sure

yawn tired naptime

I feel surprisingly calm right now so I guess I was really able to feel my anger or something I’m really surprised that it subsided so easily

I’m not sure why I’m calm but it feels good I think it’s not good to feel really strong emotions all the time

But the thing is, it’s not good to feel really strong emotions but ignoring them is just as bad for you I think and feels just as uncomfortable, and leads to feeling uneasy and on edge or lethargic. It feels like you have something you need to get out otherwise it can lead to the sensation of feeling like you’re suffocating or drowning.

So in other words I feel a whole lot better overall

I guess one reason I have trouble not dwelling on the past or being more in the present is a lifelong curse that has plagued me, I think to the best of my abilities I’ve never been able to figure it out, but for me it’s just that I think I truly have a serious problem with finding acceptance, like rejection has just been the cross I feel I’ve been tasked with bearing, I wear it everywhere I go.

But it has caused me serious anguish in the past, I think it’s a need for me to have friends, or loved ones and relationships and a job, so to be denied all that has been complete and utter anguish.

I was calm but now it’s making me upset thinking about it. It’s always been that way, almost everywhere I go I just find that I am not very popular.

I guess I just feel like I am some sort of ‘dark horse’ in some sense

I watch videos that say it could be ‘intelligence’ and that’s the main point many videos out there on social exclusion make, but yet I feel like intelligence doesn’t actually make that much of a sizeable difference for sure when it comes between people. I am not really sure, I would have to analyze it further I guess. Mostly it strikes me that it seems as though many people simply aren’t very morally upright, and simply have a greater threshold for concern about the world and the greater whole.

Liek I feel as though there’s lots of people who are halfway intelligent, but they’re not really noticeably different from the general population, it would take being more of an outlier to really experience a noticeable difference.

But yeah for me it’s mostly comes down to moral standing. It just seems like…I don’t know, like a lot of people maybe aren’t as conscious though not necessarily lesser intelligent in a significant way.

Like it makes me think of things like consumerism I guess, that’s an easy one, our society is set up and designed where our main purpose is to simply buy and consume products without much thought given to any alternatives. This obviously doesn’t really make you happy all the time and is not really fulfilling.

Well, why doesn’t the average person realize this? I did when I was quite young that you’re supposed to just spend all your time working so you can go out and buy things and it’s this self repeating cycle. Buying new things all the time is the meaning of your life. It’s like the same with watching tv, a lot of people just watch tv all the time. They’re passively spending their time.

There’s all these things that could be improved, without instead trading important social and societal improvement for fancy new tech gadgets that are more of a burden and drain on our time that doesn’t really solve or free us from our problems

thinking about ethnoregions (fantasy)

I'm watching warcraft

I'm actually starting to thinking about realmspheres now

more along minecraft terms where areas are really expansive, thus maps become useless, and holding 10% of the overworld as territory is actually MASSIVE

earth is not ideal for my sandbox headcanon

but this new/revived realmsphere take IS very ideal

its D&D/AoS like

I've changed my mind

3 or 4 or 5 land realmspheres inside a giant ocean realmsphere

meanwhile a void between the outer realmspheres, order and chaos (perhaps)

>>22916811
I want to avoid making specific realms race-homes and a centralized realm where each fights for control. because then the other realms become BORING!!!! >:[

>>22916811
7 similar land masses inside one gigantic ocean realmsphere
—> similar in the way that they have each biome, but different in the way that they are not identical to eachother.

1 chaos realm
1 realm of order


While chaos invades the mortal realms, the realm of order sends troops to intervene to protect the mortals

>>22916858
oof

erm...

i don't know...

had to stop the movie because i couldn't stop fucking yawning for no reason

meh

I'm thinking about more earth centric-erino (as in set on earth and no where else)

>>22917725
Why? So I can wage cool wars against filthy gay pagans

oh snapperino

forgot I watched that one spongebob episode about sandcastles

I should go look at sand castle youtube videorinos...

yawn naptime

I saw black african woman twerking her ass and now I want to invade africa to get black african slave women for my personal slave woman harem

Ordered the Superman blizzard treat again

YUM


Superman it’s what Superman must taste like ice cream cookie dough and sprinkles

couldn't sleep

going to try again

yawn wokeup

yawn wokeup

>>22916858
nah,

this is a good idea

earth sucks

I just realized that actually I could become a bandit

>>22919733
actually I got some big questions to ask chatgpt

>>22919790
I just remembered in that 3rd narnia movie the monarch went on a long ass sea voyage

I guess the 7 realmspheres inside one gigantic ocean realmsphere could work

>>22919800
basically in minecraft, the overworld is all random and stuff

I'm gonna call this realm of chaos/order: underworld and cloud district respectively (maybe)

yawn typing time

yawn superman reviews are in

wokeup having tea going to gi see superman in imax tonight pretty stoked cautiously optimistic

yawn wokeup fell asleep and missed the superman showing luckily there is another showing tonight