>>76380941I think I have had mild depression for at least a decade. It's always hard for me to get out of bed, I ruined my relationship from never wanting to go outside and drank all the time.. I have turned my entire life around and landed my dream job and within half a year I am back to missing work from drinking and not wanting to leave the house, binge eating, thinking about my ex. I never used to understand why people kill themselves, but ever since that bad breakup sometimes I have fleeting but genuine thoughts of just ending it.. I feel like I shouldn't be living the life I am like I'm a fraud, and I miss the girlfriend I basically abused and I hope she never sees me again. I do not take any meds. Sorry for the blog post