goof is good

dogshit
early
yank
new

any grey, shriveled penis man in?

>googles phimosis once
you can keep it

No bus
No boss
No train
No rain

>>213527181
mine's the colour of a tanned man which is different from the rest of me which is very pale

putting tf2 sentry guns in the backyard to keep the possums out

psychology, like natural science, pertains to oblique knowledge

>>213526730
Yeah absolutely. I learned on an mt07 by myself. You'll stall a bunch but it's no problem

>>213527221
inherited from the brown man your mum shagged

80 years since hiroshima was nuked lads

>>213527228
yay!

anime butts drive me nuts

>>213527228
what does that mean

one day i will have a home gym. also a home

https://x.com/Peachuu244/status/1949485268266020954/photo/1

Brit winning against the leaf.

Starting the Gay Porn Party (GPP)

>>213527320
we never have knowledge of the thing in its reality, only as it obliquely presents itself to us. but its presenting itself olbiquely to us implies (but does not guarantee) the existing of it in reality

>>213527334
>Due to local laws, we are temporarily restricting access to this content until X estimates your age. Learn more
lol

my penis brown like paki brown and I’m white as fuck it looks stupid. I think it’s because I always wear black pants and I have done my whole life

carmela soprano bored handjob with all her rings and bracelets quietly clinking as she wanks you

>>213527342
someone beat you to it

>>213527326
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKx8xE8jJZs
You need less than you think to exercise all muscle groups.

I am a prominent businessman

chocka on the m25 this morning, hour late for work already

>>213527290
occasionally when I'm out walking I think to myself "if I looked up and saw a bright white orb of plasma right now as a nuke went off, where could I dive to in order to maximise my chances of survivial?" like is there a low embankment to the side that I could jump down into and have the blast wave pass over me? A stone wall? Anything?

I think in reality though there wouldn't be any time to even think or react you'd just see a bright white flash then get turned into atoms.

I have to have all of the episodes of pop quiz give them to me

>>213527359
to think i used to think i lived in a nanny state. great britain the jobsworth nonce island

>>213527359
what about this https://files.catbox.moe/m7xwsm.jpg

>>213527385
Wrong! No women allowed in the Gay Porn Party

>>213527405
who is this he's cute I think he should be slapped

>>213527433
it would appear she did in fact tell on him

>>213527423
yeah that works
you could have just uploaded it here i guess

>>213527433
Ziedbelg in the flesh

>>213527356
yay!

odds i start on the drugs now
evens i go to shop first

>>213527472
off you pop

First, they came for the gooners, and I did not speak out, as I was not a gooner.

>>213527472
wahey get some clean pants on and get yourself out the door you junkie bastard

>>213527472
do drugs and then go to the shops so you feel like youre in an alien space station its fun

>>213527433
please don't ever click on this

>>213527472
which drugs and which shop

my arse? raped
the rapist? me

If I win the lottery I will build a house that looks like a hobbit house

>>213527479
ive still got to get out of bed and get dressed first

>>213527490
in half an hour

>>213527498
no i dont want to drive on the drugules

>>213527526
hardware store, record shop, and butcher

used to love going to woolies stoned for the thrill, it felt like going through evil fucked up airport security

>>213527575
Not allowed

hot, wet globules of coffee splattering in staccato bursts against the back of my glistening, pink throat

>>213493690

When are you supposed to use the paddles in an automatic?

allowing an irregular migrant to have his way with my arse

https://i.4cdn.org/gif/1754468864405631.mp4

>>213527601
When you want to break and accelerate

ngl i wish i were an alcoholic, seems romanticized in a way
much more fashionable to blame your problems on drink instead of being an autistic loser

>>213527608
abominations

>>213527629
i remember being 15 too x

How exactly has the 20 billion blackhole blown up to 50 billion in a year?

>>213527601
you literally just push the pedal down until you're at the speed you want
why are manual drivers so clueless

Am I crazy or does this look closer to cream than white

Rorke buying a Barrett new tunnel

>>213527638
im double that age but ok

>>213527656
PADDLE not pedal dickhead the things behind the wheel

I used to like to walk to 7eleven when stoned because I would suddenly become hyper aware of all the other people standing around staring at unnecessary snacks trying to choose what they wanted to purchase and it all seemed so surreal and silly
nothing at 7eleven is necessary unless you have a hangover or a caffeine addiction you see and that's only in the morning and this was always at night and there are no sensible or utilitarian reasons to be in a 7eleven at night

curled up in my incel burrow for the winter

when he says paddles I think he's talking about cars that have those actual paddles on either side of the steering wheel

not pedals, as multiple lads have now wrongly assumed

flappy paddle gear box :D

i have 70k in savings and have spent about 7.5 grand on credit cards recently while moving house. Do you think i should use some of my savings to pay it off or keep my savings and let them incur interest while transferring the 7.5k over to a 0% credit card and paying it off over a couple of years?

illiterate yank mongs

>>213527715
I thought only race cars had these

>>213527677
Most autos don't have sports mode which is presumably what you mean
Basically you don't need sports gears unless you want to be a wanker pretending you have some control over your torque exchange

rape cars

>>213527657
it looks white
maybe the lighting is making it look off white but not cream

When has anyone ever used the word paddle to describe a pedal you fucking mongoloids

>>213527726
I'd forgo to relatively meagre interest for peace of mind

Rowboats have paddles, cars do not.

>>213527727
t. gets confused by some meme technology in an automatic that is always unnecessary in a street vehicle

gonna be so fucking minted when grandad dies get in

>>213527657
it's white
maybe the plastic makes it look like that

>>213527741
It does have a sports mode I think but it’s not called sports mode it’s called dynamic. But it works without using the paddles I just can’t see when I’m supposed to use them

>>213527827
just stop posting you low IQ idiot

>>213527753
done you like a kipper m8

>>213527738
me too

as to why an automatic car with 2 gears (drive and reverse) would need paddle shifters, I don't know

Popping down to Deepwood Motte, you lads need anything?

love when yanks get pissed off but they don't know how to banter and let things go so they just get more and more pissed off and look like spazzoids

>>213527885
probs has manual mode that uses the paddles

To be queer to have entered G.A.Y, Boiler, Tressor, Maxxim, Kinky, and many, many others and one day they leave you at Smut in the psorokostaina and the next they play it as history. You are, yes, still a rapist like everything is done in Greece.
PS at least make sound and air conditioning which are among the basics and then you play it divas.

https://x.com/maxtempers/status/1953022054774550893
>You can buy online crib sheets and exam-style 'model answers' to maximise benefits claims for a host of unfalsifiable conditions such as depression.

But remember every PIP claiment is genuine and to try take any money off them is cruel and evil

>>213527915
deranged post

typo on official BBC thumbnail

and why are they talking about this HOE anyway (donald), focus on your own PRESIDENT

>>213527900
yea if only we practiced the great culture of talking too much shit childishly more

>>213527890
dunno what they got?

>>213527904
But there is no clutch pedal only brake and gas

I just had sex with a guy for the first time after having only hooked up with girls previously. I definitely didn’t hate it, but it was weirder than I was expecting.

For one thing, this guy took an hour. A full hour of penetration. And he kept getting super into it, then stopping, and then he’d start again. After a while the condom was so full of pre-cum that he took it off and we manually finished each other off pretty quickly- which I was fine with because my hips were cramping at this point.

Is this something that usually happens? Was this guy trying not to finish some reason, or was I doing something wrong? I was mostly just laying there adjusting to whatever position he initiated.

Hello smelly incels

>Syndey Sweeney

I'm a 24 year man, I am unemployed, I am currently lying in bed

>>213527947
ok

>>213527960
wait till you're 35 like me haha

>>213527947
you use it as a pseudo manual without the clutch
upshift or downshift based on rpms only
it's extremely unnecessary and an idiotic design

neoliberal lunch

>>213527900
they're so fucking retarded its honestly embarrassing to witness. wish they'd fuck off 2bh. no idea why they post here. such dog shit posters that will never fit in

>>213527956
hello mate :)

>>213527943
you're literally acting exactly as i just described right now lil nigga its time to log off

I wish America had a ghetto president obama was too white I want one speaks in Ebonics

I'm not gay but if I were gay (which I'm not) I would want a tall, handsome British man that likes to wear long overcoats. Again, only if I were gay though.

just be nice and funny now ok

>>213527630
read this in the orc voice from dark messiah

>>213527956
hiya x

I've heard that sometimes as part of a deceased person's will, certain family members will be left a specific nominal amount like a penny or £1 purely so that the person cannot then submit a legal challenge disputing the will suggesting that they must have been forgotten.

Nightmare mode when you get called up to attend the will reading of your rich relative who has carked it, thinking you're in for a big windfall then the stuffy solicitor reads out that you've been willed 1 pound, in front of all the other family members, bringing you back down to earth. Off you fuck back home on the bus with your cheque for a pound, knowing this rich bastard has mugged you off even in death.

>>213527921
Rattled wage slave

>>213527997
i wish america had a queen (black)

>>213527984
I think you are protesting too much

lasering off my foot hair

>>213527993
nah
i would be upset and angry instead of just telling you (lil bro) how it is

Just had to have a blood test.
Broke out in a cold sweat
Whole body seized up
Had to be told to breathe by the nurse
Heart rate probably approaching 200bpm
I'm a 6ft 2 fully grown man for fuck sake

>>213528047
concession: accepted
you: mindraped

love how the mong who can't understand basic principles of an automatic is seething hard at americans since we thought "paddies" was some british-ism for pedal

>>213527921
Benniemaxxing is a real thing but the state won't acknowledge it
There are literal influencers on tiktok with hundreds of thousands of followers dedicated to showing others how to claim the most from the state and by proxy the taxpayer

>>213528065
>fully grown man
clearly not you pathetic gimp

poo for lunch, you?

>>213527933
We don't have a president

>>213527947
>gas
FOY

>>213527921
The Bond Market and IMF won't give a fuck about this when they come-a-knocking and it's going to be fucking glorious to watch

>>213528083
we don't say mong poser

>>213528083
the time to log off was like 5 posts ago lil nigga

petrol is a much better name for gas not sure why we didn't implement it

Is this a shifter car? I cannot drive a shifter car, alright, so we got a little situation here. I can't drive these kinda cars! What the fuck is goin' on! You think that's funny? Would you like to know, smartass? Would you like to know why I can't drive this kinda car? I'll tell you why, I'm used to *luxury* cars. Have you ever heard of a luxury car? You know what luxury means? Ever heard of Cadillac, Cadillac Eldorado? That's what I drive. I drive cars that *shift* themselves.

>>213528083
seething rattled mong

new creps

>>213528065
Happens mate. I don't have any issues with needles or blood but I faint whenever I get blood tests

I know because I struggled and I cried
I know because I almost fucking died!!!!!!

petroleum shmetroleum

me? a fast food conosier

starting to like the dog shit early yank edition just to have those dog shit yanks called out

>>213528127
my car runs on ethanol

>>213528083
The only use of the word "paddies" in this thread is in your post, and now mine.

What's perhaps unsurprising is that a yank who posts in the UK thread started breathing heavily and tripping overhimself to reply when he saw a word that even slightly resembled "paddies", aching to talk about his perceived Irish heritage. You're a clown.

Applying for a patent for the phrase "#Brenter" incase we ever vote to rejoin the EU

>>213528083
No one said paddies though he said paddles

Emma Watson feces expulsion straight into my mouth.

he's frothing at the mouth while fantasizing about canine droppings again
somebody help him

got the 40% just eat voucher, luncheon sorted x

>>213528201
the yank cries out in pain as he strikes you

I <3 vincent gallo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wDVuSloYfC0

>>213528208
Its called menulog mate

did somebody say menulog?

>>213528178
reads like a mikey post which isn't a good look
>>213528182
words look very similar tbf

i cry out in pain as i yank myself

the gay urges are here

>>213528249
So it’s our fault you can’t read got it

australians being experts in banter and thinking she'll be all roite even though they're the #1 country for anti-depressant consumption

>>213527708
ktim

>>213528239
what a peng looking woman damn she is facially a 10

>>213528280
far out mate please just stop posting

Steak egg and chips for brekky

>>213528280
Hes not wrong

>>213527921
I don't have any issue with people doing this.

The problem is the system that facilitates it. If it's not robust enough to prevent fraud of this nature then it needs overhauling. If governments want to have a benefit (PIP) that awards people money for life for 'medical conditions' that are empirically unverifiable then the behaviour observed here with people gaming that system emerges naturally.

People are playing the game by the rules as laid out. We don't live in a high-trust society anymore. The systems the government in place need to reflect this.

>>213528296
nah ill keep posting lol

>>213528280
well stone the bloody crows mate!

/brit/ is feeling very Nietzschean and NatSoc this morning.

Hail Wotan!

>>213528239

>>213528291
she's about 14 there mate

eye hope eye'm not interrupting anything...

AS THE WORLD FALLS DOOOOOOOOOOWN

>>213528343
Bro really stealing my webms damn ok I see how it is

got invited to a call with the team at the london office, been 5 minutes and i'm the only one here
i suspect they're all in the meeting room in person together and have forgotten about me

>>213528358
Many black people are British of course

>>213528368
ok?

Was wondering what happened with the epic meal time guy and amazingly he has 0 allegations, half expected him to become a rapist or right wing podcaster or something

>>213528343
:(

>>213528358
British is just a passport I don’t know why you lot find that so hard to understand. It would work better if he said “I’m English”

>>213528368
the real cuckold is the absentee father as he's being cucked out of his child

warm weather is back

>>213528418
staggering levels of cope here

>>213528398
>half expected him to become a rapist or right wing podcaster

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2GARoxn0NQ

bully xl fight xl bully shot police shot bully xl killed

>>213528343
gran got blasted

>>213528429
o'rorkes crib

The world is ruled by the law of the jungle. Those who believe in liberalism (i.e., Christian ethics) or men who take refuge in a castle like ladies who don’t want to be raped by invaders violate natural law: they are doomed to extinction. As the Führer said, “He who wants to live should fight, and he who does not want to battle in this world of eternal struggle does not deserve to be alive”.

the real cucks are women

>>213528418
not really
he reproduced and the person who has the responsibility of raising it didnt

fizzy grapefruit lime coconut raspberry lemonade

>>213528398
He still goes on the PKA podcast now and then.

He's a massive kike, unironically wants genocide in 'za and all that.

He's kinda funny other than that.

>>213528426
love to see it

>>213528390
No they are not.

>>213528409
There are black English people though, like those who play for England's football team

>>213528433
You mock him but that baby will grow up with a stepdad who loves him and cares for him, most likely he will see him as his dad. And the man also has a wife who loves him. Meanwhile you are a fat virgin who will never have love in your life

Suffering at the hands of demonic entities

>>213528390
huge lel

>>213528343
when stuff like this happens I have no instinctive desire to rush over and help

the other day at work after my shift ended I was heading out and I heard a tremendous crash around the corner and a bunch of shit falling to the floor in a place I knew people were working but it wasn't in my line sight or in the path I was taking toward the door so I just pretended not to notice, kept walking and left

afterwards it struck me that I really didn't care. Someone, one of my colleagues, could have been seriously hurt there but my only thought was "I'm finished work now so I'm leaving now and someone else can deal with that". It's probably a bad attitude to have and goes a long way to explaining why people hate me but it is what it is.

>>213527960
My advice is get any job as soon as you can

>>213528507
i'm still not paying to raise another man's bastard child, the epitome of cuckoldry

>>213528507
Sent that incel to the blackest depths of niggerhell

>>213528504
If England became its own country and had an English passport then sure but right now English is just an ethnicity.

The vibrant coloured lines adds a nice splash of colour to the drab grey pavements of London and every other city in the UK.

The new Yookay aesthetic

>>213528487

>>213528409
No British is any member of the indigenous groups of the British isles

>>213528520
got about 10 words into this novella and tapped out. fucking hell mate you are boring

the freaks are flying

>>213528534

Training an army of incel supersoldiers

>>213528291
Watch The Rocketeer, it's peak Connelly

>>213528305
>chips for breakfast
Noncey behaviour

>>213528520
Do you have autism?

many black people are irish

>>213528526
Such a childish mindset. You will be a virgin for the rest of your life even if your pay a brass you’ll still be a virgin how does that feel

>>213528593
probably yeah

>>213528613
based :)

>>213528578
>21
>peak
lol no

got blacked up the arse at campbelltown station

where is the oddest place you've performed the wanking ceremony lads?

>>213528578
>Noncey behaviour
Potatoes are a vegetable mate nothing wrong with it

https://youtu.be/-arfqd09P64
This made me want to get a motorbike

i yearn for life in scandinavia, where they all give eachother 20 feet of space at the bus stop
sounds comfy

>>213528499
>>213528515
There are many black Brits. Lenny Henry, Ainsley Harriott, Stormzy, etc.

>>213528533
Ian Wright is English, he was born in England, has lived in England, and therefore he qualified for the England football team. Same with Marcus Rashford, Bukayo Saka, Jude Bellingham, etc

>>213528642
these people have nothing to live for

I'm starting to think my brother is only my half brother. He's really nothing like my dad.

>>213528612
are you a bastard with some cuckolded stepdad or are you raising another man's bastard lad, be honest

the ghosts have been touching me again

>gf is out all day
>60% chance that she'll want to have some fun when she's back
>8+ hours of trying not to wank to milfs

Tried ouzo today tastes like SHIT

addison rae x

No matter how strange it seems... I still love You

>>213528658
The guy in that video has a son and a wife. He does videos with his son

>>213528673
based milf enjoyer

>>213528684
proud traditional british man

>>213528625
Go back to /tv/

>>213528698
then he's incredibly selfish

>>213528734
LOL

cock in my mouth
cock up my arse
cock in my ear

>>213528711
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0bmJlrhRg4

State pension age to raise to 80.

>haha good think I have a fat private pension, not like those state pension scrounger proles!

The age you can access your private pension raises in line with the state pension age. You'll never see that money. Of course the pension company will enjoy the dividends from all that invested money between now and then. Not you though, no you'll die long before then. Thanks for playing.

>>213528642
seen much better motorcycle speeding videos

>>213528711
do you get paid for these posts or are you just an incredibly miserable mentally ill cunt posting demoralisation shit out of your own volition

>>213528662
Neither its just such a childish mindset you have. If you fall in love with a woman and she has a baby and that father ran off it doesn’t make you a cuckold to help raise that baby. Why should an innocent child grow up without a father figure in their life all because their biological father doesn’t care about them.

>>213528642
h-he's fast

This chick gets salty at me if I don't hang out with her or see me hanging out with other people but every time I try to coordinate meeting with her she flakes out on me.
Sometimes I wonder if it's because I'm not interested in her romantically.

>>213528758
You can cash out your private pension early
My dad started taking his out at 50

uh oh
they're getting angry

>>213528773
Miserable incels love to spread their misery

>>213528773
they're just pathetic 4chan addicts compelled to do their daily ritual autism posting. nothing else going on in their lives

>>213528767
He does a wheelie at over 150mph though. Anyway, link them pls

>>213528773
how is that image demoralizing hahaha

>>213528775
not my fault the kid's a bastard and the mum was a retard, not is it anyone's responsibility to pick up after him for ditching
you have a cuckold mindset

>>213528711
keeping the timmies fed and the katies satisfied
unsung heroes

very VERY compelling recommend anyone with an open mind to give it a watch. If the assertions in the documentary are true it will be the biggest miscarriage of justice in British Legal history.

>>213528814
what the hell is that?

why is dtfic spamming scat

Wonder if the girl who asked to reschedule our date will actually reschedule it or if it was just an excuse not to go

https://www.instagram.com/p/DM2cE5jxDnJ/

>>213528718
You wouldn’t say that about skiers or base jumpers etc

>>213528807
i saw them on another imageboard a while ago. completely empty freeway, going insanely fast

>>213528823
Mad how everyone just accepts this was a massive coverup job now

gnawing at my wooden bedposts

>>213528816
Did I say it was? I said if you fall in love with a woman and she has a baby who’s father ditched it doesn’t make you a cuckold or mean you have a “cuckold mindset” to help raise that child as your own.

>>213528823
Dont care send her to the gallows

>>213528886
vile

>>213528851
i think they're as pathetic

>>213528859
He goes 300kmh how is that not insanely fast

free my nigga lucy

>>213528861
footiemong are so dull and servile

I see how it is

>>213528931
Scouse hands

Big 4 becomes big 6 becomes big 10 football football

>>213528775
Woman with at least one child = claimed
If the man who claimed her doesn't want to be a daddy, then that's not my problem. The children will probably grow up with his bastard tendencies anyway. You will never love somebody else's kids like your own, and they will never love you like their real parents.

Mad how based William Luther Pierce was.

People using AI to communicate on dating apps has to be the strangest step in human evolution so far

>>213528916
Once you pass a certain speed it doesn't feel any faster just gets more dangerous. It's the g forces that are fun. Accelerating hard, braking and leaning over.

>>213528823
I'll give it a watch later on x

Washed my white clothing today

frankly if you're not traveling several dozen km/s then I don't want to hear about how 'fast' you're going

My gf is one of those people who doesn't want to watch films and TV shows from more than 20 years ago, she thinks they're all "old crap", pisses me off

>>213529013
How do you know

>>213528418
LMAO HOLY COPE

>>213529045
I just put them all in the same wash

today's modern fabrics, chemicals and washing technologies means both lights and darks can be washed together (I assume)

>>213528962
The league is a big 6 cabal. Newcastle and Villa have tried to break it. When the time comes to build a champions league squad the rules will deduct points for non big 6 clubs offering champions league wages. Meanwhile the 15th team that has spent the year decrying they have no money and sacking dinner ladies drops £220m+ on transfers before selling anyone

Cooked league

>>213529006
It's not surprising, smartphones have made most people so dumb that they can't hold a decent conversation anymore

>>213528961
That early '90s interior refurb of the '67 and '72 stock was kino.

>>213528418
insane cope

>>213528995
Cheers virge

>>213529057
I've owned multiple motorbikes with well over 100hp.

>>213529052
*flies through the thread at 10000000000000000000km/s*

>>213529052
Where's he going

>>213528998
>>213529049
it not right

>>213529056
How old is she?

doing all manner of pooey squelchy farts

just pulled this tart at the pub

>>213529142
35

>>213529105
ad hominem

>>213529108
Ok then I’ll believe you

>>213529127
>>213529182
heathermong mate we heard you the first time you don't have to spend your literal entire waking life spamming this shit

>>213529056
Put gurren lagann on the telly, she'll recant her bs

>>213529188
>>213529188
>>213529188
>>213529188

>>213529165
Not at all

>>213529163
Shameful. She should know better. Show her Shawshank Redemption or something

>>213529194
The fuck is that?

>>213529079
It’s over for you

farts be stinky recently x

>>213531205
>>213531205
>>213531205
>>213531205
Sneed