Holstaur Farm Edition

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cows are too powerful, they need a nerf

>>49804293
too bad, your going to the farm

alt thread: https://capybarachan.org/mg/res/36325.html

>>49804345
I think you meant alp thread.
Only homosexual men post there.

>>49804283 (OP)
LET THE HEBI IN

>>49804501
Only if she promises to vore me after cuddle time.

>The lights start flickering
>The phone begins to ring
>The walls start oozing green slime
Which monster am I getting?

>>49804351
Oh, then we both better get there as quickly as possible!

>>49804554
I would guess that's a fight between a green slime who WAS in your walls and the shog who just moved in and is assimilating your house. The important thing is figure out how to get a cute black cat that you and your shog wife can name together. I bet she's got a lot of interesting name ideas.

>>49804283 (OP)
>>>/tg/96175116
>>>/tg/96178287

>>49805117
Finally, our long time /tg/ allies will save this thread...

Here is your Whitehorn, gentlemen.
https://x.com/GenshinImpact/status/1951856054712611267

>>49804283 (OP)
So did anyone heard? A regular Zipangese Office Woman became instantanously viral because she was cute. And said Zipangese Office Lady is just a mere HUMAN woman...

How do mamono react to this???

>>49804501
my bed is not sufficiently braced for ms hebi

>>49805375
Sleep on the floor in a pile of pure white coils.

>>49805173
That's just an elf with horns.

>>49805380
i don't know, that doesn't sound very good for my back

>>49804293
>they need a nerf
Something went wrong, they got a buff instead

>>49805472
>eyepatch seal, horn seal
what other methods can be innovated in ushi safety?

>>49805481
cottonballs on the tips of her horns. Don't want to poke someone's eye out now!

>>49805489
cotton doesn't seem sturdy enough

>>49805481
Forklift certification!

Be honest.

You'd kiss her, wouldn't you?

>>49805838
no; it's shit

>>49805844
See, the fact that it's shit is what makes the Danuki Breath Guy so into it. He is a KNOWN lover of scat.

>>49805844
Oh sorry, here's one that's more up your alley:
https://litter.catbox.moe/t0seceh8cg40b4yd.jpg

>>49805883
And here's one that is more up YOUR alley!
https://files.catbox.moe/qda2r7.jpg

>>49805883
i've no idea why you think i'd open that. i'm subject to enough of your regurgitated drivel already

>>49805250
Sometimes i wonder if all anons idealized waifu if translated into 3d would be small asian women.

>>49805904
I doubt it. How is a giant spider cow gonna work as a small asian woman?

>>49805909
Big spider.
Small head.
Puffy asian cheeks and a round head

>>49805921
You're describing a cute lil jumping spooder, not a MASSIVE, TERRIFYING SPIDER COW.

>The average holstaur experience
>https://files.catbox.moe/zt5ocx.mp4

>>49804351
how are you STILL seething over capybarachan?????

What kind of elf magic is this?

>>49806260
never doubt pettiness

been thinking about worms recently, the green ones.

>walk into centaur barn
>i’m so hungry i could eat a horse
>centaur tired of me making that joke everyday sits on my face

>>49806260
Try stop posting it here and none of us will care anymore.

>>49806731

>>49806734
>Try stop posting it here

Engage with democracy. Mandatory voting!

>>49806820

>>49806906
I want a hairjob from her

>>49806906
She might look appealing now, but inside her insectoid heart is the collectivist nature of communism.

>>49807039
Hot

>The most evil, sinister, and powerful monster girl in MGE

>>49807915
I can't think of anything evil except... her scent puts men to sleep and then she steals their seed?

>>49806734
try learning english before posting here

>>49807970
I think you're confusing multiple girls. Weresheep is the one that makes you sleepy.

But all that aside, you don't know the inner machinations of a dormouse's mind. They are pure evil, plotting world domination and destruction. But because they're asleep all the time, their plans never come to fruition.

Years of resentment for being used as tea sweetener by cheshires and hatter push them to this life of pure evil and chaos.

>>49807995
>I think you're confusing multiple girls.
Probably, as I made it up with no regard to mge.

>>49805392
She can transform in a deer form

>>49808281
That's like saying a human girl counts as a kobold because she can transform into a dog.

>>49808385
When she wears the fursuit she IS a dog.

Any tips for living with an apophis?

>>49808415
they're a good beginner pet

Bicorn wife discovered the horsegirl gacha game.

>Cook dinner for Shoggy
>Put a lot of effort into it
>Sit down prepared to eat
>Mouth on her dress opens and she shovels the whole plate in
>Looks at my all smugly and says it was delicious

>>49808784
Quit eating the goddamn good china, woman!

>>49808791
she can make more

>>49808784
>>49808791
>She didn't even enjoy the food itself
>It was the ceramic plate that tasted good to her
>The human food was just "dressing"

>>49808768

How different aristocratic undead treat their zombie servants
>Wights
Highly protective and loving, cherish their zombie maids like daughters. Expect you to marry them properly, ceremony and all. Will give you a list of foods the zombie likes and dislikes and a box with all the zombie’s clothes, heated stuff animal, snacks and more. Visits often making sure you’re taking care of the zombie properly.
>Vampire
Tsundere about their zombie maids acting like they are extremely beneath them but really care for them. Will allow you to take them as you please but will secretly visit making sure you’re taking care of the zombie properly and is ready to bust down your door if she sees you abusing her such as cumming inside the zombie and not cuddling her afterwards of hogging the blankets for yourself.
>Lich
Uncaring on the surface and rationalizes her love for her zombies as merely pride that a craftsman takes in his work to any who ask but really cares for and loves her zombies. Will bore you with hours of details on how to take care of a zombie before allowing you to take one, will even make you practice dressing her, redoing her stitches, proper bedtime routine and more before letting you take her.
>Phantom
Unwilling to let go, how can she ever let zombie extra #43 go? How will the crowds in her plays feel that much more unlively with her gone? Will only let you take the zombie if you perform in play starring a love struck man and a zombie tied to her mistress unable to leave but love conquers all and they elope with each other. Will “hint hint, wink wink, nudge nudge” you until you catch on and star in her play.

kiss sneks

>>49808471
Sanae a slut, hebis are loyal

>>49809002
No, kiss foxes

>>49809026
foxes dont deserve kisses
at best they get head pats

>>49808464
living dolls are cute but i wish you posted more different pictures rather than the same shit every thread

>>49809052
Living dolls are not nice to cuddle cause their joints pinch

>>49809052
NTA, but there's not a ton of living doll art:
https://st44244.ispot.cc/nextcloud/index.php/s/5gejY2EanMN6BiS
And what there is really leans on a living doll just standing there, which isn't suuuuuuper interesting either.
>>49809117
This is my greatest fear with living dolls, automatons, and living armor. That's the kind of thing that could compleeeeeeetely take me out of it during sexy times and make me afraid to do cuddle times. I don't ever want to be afraid to cuddle my wife.

>>49809052
it was never about variety or quality, he wants to smother the thread in garbage

>>49809016
shit meme kys and dont insult sneks

>>49808390
They're adapting!

>>49808464
I hate visible joints.

>>49810263

>>49810274
How can anons see this and not just think this is a woman with no legs in a futuristic wheelchair?

>Anubises, sphinxes, and all the girls of pharaoh's kingdom are all actually undeads

>>49804554

I'm 110% monster girl!

>>49810296
The extra eyes might give it away.

Be careful when it comes to tea offered by Wonderland's residents. One bad encounter is all it takes to wake up as a monster's panties.

Capycucks are already eating each other because of loli posting

>>49810892
>Ugh I HATE [other website] SO MUCH that's why I'm there ALL THE TIME
>n-no I'm not just over there shitposting and instigating and deliberately trying to make it worse (and also here worse) I promise
You don't like anything.

>>49810892
I don't really care. This place is better.

>>49810892
>Two More Weeks, I promise bro hold on

>>49810995
Can't be doing too well if they insist on posting their thread here still.

>>49811036
you made me look it up
In the time the previous thread was up and had 392 replies , /mge/ threads had 1113 posts. Not to mention all the empty spam posts padding post count here.
I didn't realize the gap was that wide, wow.

>Elf who exclusively dates humans because they have a fetish for the elderly and it takes an elf 800 years to get their first grey hair

always rub a cheshire's paws

>>49811234
what happens if I don't?

>>49811185
What do you expect from a species that dresses like this?

>>49810892
>The undesirable plebbit tourists left for capy
Hasn't it been obvious with how peaceful it's been here?
I mean sure, we still have the furfag mick and breathbro (assuming they're different people), but they don't go out of their way to derail threads with autistic screeching like the "everything I don't like should be reported, removed, and banned" crowd that's now on capy. I think it's a detailed fact now that they were the ones doing it here too.

>>49811279
you get cheshire paws on your face when you least expect it
there is no getting away from them

I desire to repeatedly insert my tongue into a cheshire cat's mouth for a long period of time

>>49811364
Local man discovers kissing. More at 6

>>49811352
I'll simply put a scratching post up nearby to keep her paws busy whenever she's around and by the time she's done with that her attention span for me will be spent and she'll leave

>Sick and tired of cheshire putting her fat paws and even fatter ass in my face
>Ask Queen of Hearts to cut off her head
>One guillotine and lost head joke later I have a headlesshire
>Whenever she gets all smug I pop off her head and run away with it from her body

>>49811087
ouch

ms lich ms wurm ms baphomet where art thou. We need your fluffposting.

How do I out-yandere a Hebi so she leaves me alone?

>>49811087
1000 post and yet somehow still worse than this thread

>>49811364
She same but her lower mouth. I mean I lift up her skirt and rather than her precious place greeting me, there is that fucking face smiling at me, mocking me, am I going insane?

Tell me. Why do you like them monster girls, Anon?

>>49812285
They are monsters on the outside and angels on the inside.

>>49812364
IS THAT....!?!?!?

>>49812364
>Meanwhile, angels are doing this

>>49812285
-sexy nonhuman bits. horns, wings, tails, ears, fluff, etc
-power dynamics
-humanity has let me down and I have no place among my own kind so I might as well try another kind
-the idea of finding genuine love in an intelligent creature of another species with a different psychology and physiological needs is the truest form of romance, crossing bridges yet unseen in this meager reality that denies ancestral directives (create more humans)
-supersex. ultrasex. gigasex. megasex. galactosex. more sex than you can shake a stick at

>>49812382
No it's hidden.

I bet cheshires stink!

nah I'm pretty sure they smell nice

>>49812471
>nah I'm pretty sure they smell nice
Purple paws typed this post

>>49812472
if I was a cheshire I wouldn't be posting here I'd be masturbating
they definitely smell nice and it's mean to be mean to them

>>49812476
They smell of incense and peppermints.

>>49812487
that's more like it. more posts like this, that are kind to our hardworking, adorable, lovable, loyal cheshire friends

>>49812487
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo7UxnXnRlQ

>>49812364
Woah shes got a Wii down there! Awesome!

>>49812285
80% of times they're very lovey-dovey, cute, and quirky and that's just the itch a lonely, reclusive man like me needs
Plus 90% of times they also look super cool soooooo yeah who doesn't want a cute cool dork wife?

>>49812584
That literal bitch is about to learn about the Assyrian reconquest of Babylon. Then, while she's crying, we'll read Peter's badass "I am a Roman citizen." moment.

I'm getting so snugglefucked tonight.

>>49812741
What in the wide, wide world of sports are you talking about?

>>49812749
She asked for full Bronze Age Bible Study and that's what she's gonna get.

remember that if you knock up an ancient evil you have to knock up an ancient good as well so the good and evil are even

>>49813327
ancient goods aren't sexy

>Hellhound constantly talks about being indomitable
>Her search history is filled with:
>Hellhound doggy style
>Hellhound mating pressed
>Hellhound blackmailed

>>49813364
Why are all maledomfags so cringe? We had fr*g and now that kind of nigger trying to bend profile into something they're not.

>>49813503
why are femdomfags such low t little bitches???

>>49813558
You're not welcome here, monster girl is all about femdom, fuck off.

>>49813364
call her a silly doggy

>Best baker in Winterstown
>Will likely cause you to gain weight as a result
>Is a good listener
>Always invites you over to her spacious lodge
>Kind and soft-spoken
>Offers to be your transportation "free" of charge
>Always smells like a mix of cinnamon and pine
>Extremely fashionable
>Will pick out your outfits if you choose to live with her
>Has an antler molestation fetish that will demand you molest then when they're bleeding and shedding
Yea or nay on the northern cow?

>>49810126
You don't belong here

"Please sweetie! We already have 9 daughters!"
>"Lol..."
>"Lmao even!"

>>49813771
NTA, but I don't really belong anywhere

>>49813503
>r trying to bend profile into something they're not.
who cares about this?

>>49811185
can't a single elven woman all but marry herself into nobility?
>marry some human with money
>make him a child
>said child is now extermily beauitful and marry child off to another noble family
>1st human dies of old age and rule of inheretince gives you all he owns
>rinse and repeat
>in 200 years have more weath than most kings
>people can't rebel against her since she is the matriach of countless familylines
Now imagine if all elves used their brain they could outright sleep their way into the top of human hieracy and hell outright breed humanity out with some half elf being a reminder of humans?
Come to think of we live in a human empire ? why is our empress and noblity all elv..............
*Nothing to see here fellow citizen!

>>49814136
>make him a child
I'm so far off the deep end I couldn't think if this meant have a child with him or turn him into a child.

Egyptian Beetleborgs

>you will never be breastfed by a holstaurus

>>49814328
You really want to drink warm milk?

>>49814181
have a child with him
>I'm so far off the deep end
Yeah

I did a story about bees and forgot to link it here, sorry. Please enjoy.

https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/177197311

Foxes deserve my bloodline.

>>49815326
>Do not reupload my art
I’m telling the artist on you

>>49815538
>Post your art on a site where anyone can right-click and save it
>expect them not to repost it elsewhere

>>49815574
Watch out for that DMCA, anon.

>>49815779
That reminds me of spice and wolf. Which reminds of this image. Which is heaven.