>>40194729if i knew they were? no, it would be terrible knowing someone was around me just out of pity/obligation
if i didn't know at the time?
still probably no, knowing someone (even after the fact) was actually so disgusted by me that they had to pretend to like me, especially over a long period of time, i would probably genuinely kill myself or something after knowing that.
or at least, resort to complete social isolation and rot away completely until death
even a genuine-relationship-turned-sour is better than that outcome.
thankfully, i am not even worth pretending to love