ive been full time for over a year now. everyone i know has been referring to me as she for at least that long, and i must pass because literally 100% of strangers call me she without issue either (biggest factor helping this was voice training for sure)

the thing is i don't get a sense of joy or euphoria when people i don't know call me she, i actually psychologically wince... it doesn't feel right. i have done a lot of thinking and i think it's because it feels like im lying

most of the day i feel like im playing a character, i don't know who i am any more but this isn't me and i just don't feel happy. i thought this was temporary and would fade away after i "settled in" to my new life/identity but truth is it's not getting any better

i really need some advice

cmon please dont ignore me now

>>40274379 (OP)
anon if you really want to be the person you are, or who you desire to be you cant let people who are calling you the incorrect words stop you from that. do you really feel bad / wince when people call you she her and other effeminate things ?

>>40274379 (OP)
when did you start transitioning?

>>40275317
>if you really want to be the person you are,
idk who i am, i just want to be loved
>do you really feel bad / wince when people call you she her and other effeminate things ?
90% of the time yes because it just feels like... idk, like a game, it's not real

>>40275344
right when covid hit but there's been all kinds of obstacles slowing me down and now that im free and clear i just feel empty and hollow and stupid

>>40274379 (OP)
a lot of us are just mentally fucked and never feel comfortable with themselves, its better to just think about how you want to look

>>40274379 (OP)
>most of the day i feel like im playing a character
Yeah, no shit. Did you unironically think "well every single thing about my body was male, but magically only my mind was totally female"? You fell for a meme, its ok, we all fuck up sometimes. You can either continue the self-torment of the obvious self-contradiction being a tranner is, or you can move on with your life and realize you are more than a penis or vagina.

>>40274379 (OP)
shock horror - a tranny that realises that stealthing is deceiting.

>>40275454
pic looks like Bailey in a better timeline

>>40275467
be nice

>>40274379 (OP)
im scared this will happen to me despite the fact that i enjoy being feminine and being treated like a women. i guess its just after spending so many years being strictly treated as a male and referred to as "he" anything different sounds a little jarring even though i dont like it. this is probably why people "she/they" cope tho maybe ill just do that

>>40275505
If we all stopped hating men, the tranner disease would die overnight. Men are better looking than women.

>>40275775
why can't we all just be happy looking like this, again..??

>>40277450
if i looked like that id probably not transitioned

>>40274379 (OP)
I hate you nigga
>t. miserable dysphoric repGOD who knows what actually living a lie every single day feels like

>>40274379 (OP)
What made you transition in the first place? Would it be better for you to be like that again?

I'm a manmoder and have done honmoding before and every time I get called she/her I become extremely anxious but also happy in case they suddenly say 'oh sorry, you're obviously a man'
It honestly feels magical being called she/her, it's like I'm existing in an alternate world where I get to be a woman and just exist as a woman but it's very fragile because I never passed well in honmode and I live as a man atm

>>40275775
he's only attractive because he looks like a woman

>>40277923
>tight waist
>square torso
>larger biceps
>flat chest
>longer limbs
>larger head
>thicker neck
>>hes a woman just like me!!!11!!1!!
Delusions from a tranner mind, the greatest problem in that mind is AUTISM - the inability to comprehend that there is more in this world than pure femininity and pure masculinity - that there is more than just penis vs vagina. What should be taught to them is aesthetics and artistic beauty, a study on human form so that they can learn to appreciate what is intrinsically known to artists and proven by studies: androgynous qualities are what we perceive as most beautiful.

>>40274379 (OP)
k cool thx for sharing try a livejournal or something no one wants to stoop to noticing your sad little life

>>40274379 (OP)
do it

>>40278338
>>>hes a woman just like me!!!11!!1!!
>a quote i didn't fucking say lmao

>>40274379 (OP)
People on this board will tell you to transition no matter what.
Make your own choices.

>>40278493
>I didn't say word for word the obvious implication of my post
The only manner in which you are a woman without a doubt is being too cowardly to stand next to your own beliefs.

>>40278684
you just made up something i didn't say to get mad about and now you're mad because i told you that

>>40274379 (OP)
stop the transition NOW!!! what you are doing is dangerous for your body and believe me you will live a more happy life if you go back to your old self. i know transition seems the anwser for gender dysphoria but is really not. the world has natural causes and you were born the gender you were born for a reason. once put aside all those hormones believe me you will be way more happy than you are now

>T. destranner

>>40278745
>more cuntbabble

>>40274379 (OP)
> don't get a sense of joy or euphoria when people i don't know call me she
go masturbate to some sissy hypno that seems to fix that right right up for a lot of people
> i feel like im playing a character
duh so you didn't realize that a successful transition wouldn't make you a woman, it would only make you appear as one... the feeling feminine has to come from the inside and should be there before transition.

>>40278778
LMAOOO

>>40274379 (OP)
>nigga fell for the Jewish psyop
Now go shoot up a pride parade for revenge

>>40278876
this guy gets it

>>40278778
>weehh please go into the bucket its way better here than outside

>>40274379 (OP)
holy shit i relate so much. i pass to virtually everyone, meaning i have exactly what i always wanted. and yet i don't get euphoric about it like i used to. i either feel nothing, or cringe internally when someone calls me a lady or uses my legal name. i relate so much to feeling like it's a character. i've started occasionally using a male name despite girlmoding full time but that's also cringy because then i'm worried they think i'm an afab trender.

unfortunately i don't have advice because i have no idea what's going on or what to do about it. detransitioning isn't an option for me because i still want to LOOK like a woman, i'm just weirdly uncomfortable with having to actually pretend to BE one. i'm almost convinced that a third gender would feel the most right for me, but society doesn't recognize that as a thing; everyone gets lumped into men and women even if they're intersex. i'd rather be in the women box than the men box, but i don't feel like i genuinely belong in it.

>>40275405
this might be it desu. i want to look and sound like a woman so better to just let people to treat me like a woman while allowing my self to feel like whatever. still it's a bit uncomfortable not having a place for yourself where you feel right.

>>40275454
>Did you unironically think "well every single thing about my body was male, but magically only my mind was totally female"?
i guess i did but when put that way it makes sense that my mind would be some kind of hermaphrodite fuckery rather than female. but you're a retard for thinking transitioning is a meme or a bad choice for people like us; i'd genuinely rather commit suicide, than stop hrt and become a disgusting hairy, balding, bearded man. even if i'm not really a woman,i'm certainly not a man either and being able to continue to be a feminized "boy" requires hrt and the like.

>>40275467
it's not deceiting to groom my self as i like. it's not MY problem if you find me hot and that sends you spiraling.

>>40278778
where the fuck do these retards come up with this hrt is dangerous narrative? it's literally not.

>>40274379 (OP)
what a difficult thing to be going through. I'm sorry. you should be proud of yourself for feeling through it honestly
if you're thinking about taking the step of detransitioning, if there anything stopping you from experimenting with male presentation for a week?
as early as you are in transition, you could probably read male if you dressed appropriately and moved your voice back
that could let you decide if being a man feels more comfortable, or if your discomfort about being called girl words is an adjustment still in progress

>>40279641
>as early as you are in transition
Uh
>ive been full time for over a year now.
>i must pass because literally 100% of strangers call me she without issue either
Doesn't sound that early into transition

>>40279682
>full time for a year
good while, obviously your transition has "worked" so it would take effort
what do you have to lose from trying?

>>40279609
>you're a retard for thinking transitioning is a meme
Its a direct result of being mindbroken by oversocialization on the internet, there is nothing more "meme" (an idea, behavior, style, or usage that spreads from person to person within a culture) than being a tranner.

Realistically what is your reason for """transitioning"", not wanting to be ugly in your eyes? Not only is the obsession focused on shallow aesthetics, simply taking Dutasteride would prevent any body hair, balding, or beard growth anyways. For what purpose is the rest? Assuming you continue your aesthetics argument, its quite clear that this is no different than other aesthetic-based surgeries like botox or hair transplants.

Transgenderism is a meme, its nothing more than shallow aesthetics hunting at best, and outright mental illness at worst.

>>40274379 (OP)
I'm a cis man and while I don't get "gender euphoria" from being a man, I am content with it and feel nothing wrong with it. Not feeling "gender euphoria" is normal regardless of what your gender identity or birth sex are. There is nothing wrong with being trans woman or cis man. You are allowed to stay a trans woman or detransition. You're not a hon so do whichever one gives you the most joy. You can always boymode for a period, dip your toes back and see how you feel.

>>40279720
you really are unfathomably unintelligent. transgender people precede the internet by thosands and thousands of years. in fact, my own personal experience with feelings of wanting to be a woman precede what we now call the internet. i'm not wasting a breath more on you.

>>40279700
I'm not OP

>>40279754
>transgender people precede the internet by thosands and thousands of years
You mean enslaved court Eunuchs that were castrated at a young age against their will lmao?

Of course there were a one-in-a-million mentally ill spergs who might have wished to become women, but its very clear that the modern incarnation is for the vast majority (99%) nothing more than an internet meme. You being here on 4chan.org and posting tranime images is not great evidence for you being the 1% who instead of falling for a meme - are simply mentally ill and no different than a schizophrenic.

>>40278833
Trvthke

>>40274379 (OP)
Iktf. Partly I think it's down to the cultural shift in trans acceptance, the collective consciousness + internalized transphobia
I never felt this way in 2018, back then it was actually becoming normalized