I've been on hrt for 4 years and recently started experimenting with clothes..... I like what I see in the mirror but I'm ashamed that I want this. I downplay myself by saying I'm such a faggot for this. Im too ugly, I'm a brick, my voice sucks. I just generally insult myself for wanting to be a girlmoder and having others see me as an actual girl. I call myself agp for being even slightly happy about performing femininity

Why am I so ashamed of actually trying? Why can't I just come out and be a full time girlmoder?

You just have to do it. The mind worms fade with time. Just voice train and do what works for you, hrt doesn't magically do all the work. It took me years of social transition but I'm at the point now where I am never even given a second glance and if I do get one its because I'm being creeped on or its someone in thr community who is sus

>>40349283 (OP)
you sound like me but 5 years hrt still working on it but i differently want ffs before ever girlmoding

>>40349283 (OP)
are you into men at all? I’d love to help you girlmode.

>>40349283 (OP)
Too much 4chan on one hand, too low of a self-image on the other
>>40349351
This^ You miss every shot u don't take

>>40349351
>>40349459
I just don't know how to muster the courage to tell everyone I hate being called a man and that I'm a trans woman. I tried long ago when I was young but was denied and it hurts me still. Whenever I think about putting effort in I downplay myself so I can't actually believe that I can be a real girlmoder

>>40349683
Well girl, cis or not. Women have to insist if they wanna be heard
Stand your ground, count ur blessings and thank those that stick by you. Doesn't have to be everyone in one go, start with someone u trust

>>40349729
Maybe its my low self esteem but I feel like I don't deserve to be heard. I betrayed so many people by starting hrt behind their backs I feel guilty about it

>>40349786
def low self esteem. and that's bullshit, how is it betrayal? ppl don't do things out in the open they think makes them unsafe or a target.
that's what you did, cus u have sense. their fault u don't feel safe enough to tell em

>>40349283 (OP)
Here's what I did, I voice trained and I gradually presented more androgynous, then gradually presented more feminine, trying it out in like places where I'd never see anyone again anyways and built up confidence over time. I'm like full time now at two and a half years except for extended family I never see anyways. At first I felt so embarrassed and so scared but I realized it was completely fine and nobody had any issue with it