whew this is gonna be a long one... I'm a 25 year old is presenting male. All my habits, emotions, thoughts and interests are male in nature (mostly)

there were a couple of incidents in my youth (described below) and that combined with regular porn use pushed me towards CD and femdom fantasies when i was 14 -18. Used to read manga like ranma 1/2, nyotaika, family compo and daydream about how 'easy' life would be if i just woke up as a woman.

As a kid (6-9) my mom treated me differently than my brother it just felt a bit off. She showed me pictures of her dressing me up as a girl because they really wanted a daughter and instead got me. Used to get teased at school because I looked scrawny and had a girlish face.

>When I was 10 I was kissed on the mouth by my friend's dad he kept saying I looked pretty like a girl and stopped with his wife walked in and glared at him.
>In uni-a social science prof asked me and another twinkish looking guy from my class to 'talk' and made me sit on his lap and groped me - at that time i just froze and didn't know how to react.
>When I was 19 a random guy on a crowded bus rubbed my thighs and was trying to touch my dick.

In retrospect when I think about incidents like these a part of my brain blames me saying ' a real man would have never let it happen or gotten violent in these cases so you must have liked it you bitch '

continued ...

when I got busy with work it got repressed and I even got a gf and we dated for over a year with a good sex life. I was attracting women and going on dates .

Now I'm cooped up in a different city because I'm doing a masters program and all these pent up thoughts are seeping back into me and I've been gooning to sissy porn and imagining someone force-feminizing me and last week I hooked up with a MtF transwoman and gave my first BJ and at the time I didn't dislike it at all

I NEED a way to get out of this because I'm no longer the androgynous twink-looking guy from 5 years ago and I know any steps towards a MtF journey would be painful for me as I wont pass because of my shoulder-waist ratio, jawline and super deep voice. Not to mention my family would disown me. It makes rational sense to abandon this train of thought but its tied in with my porn habits.

So far I made a confession at a church and am hanging out more with the church community, where there are some queer guys and girls trying to make a turnaround... has anyone beat AGP ? help me out please

>>40404866 (OP)
its already over. get a therapist, get some voice training, and get some ketamine

>>40404866 (OP)
i ain’t reading all that. get over yourself.

you should pick up drinking

>>40404866 (OP)
aхaхaх нyнy

>>40404866 (OP)
keep repping repking. it will be so manly and gender affirming of you to join the male suicide statistics.

>>40404866 (OP)
>has anyone beat AGP
why do keep keep asking the same question when they obviously already know the answer?
no, you can't become normal, you'll always be agp, it's a fundamental part of you.
>praying away the gay in a church
lmao you people are all the same.
keep repping then, most repper retards can't accept their trannybrain condition is terminal and they keep coping for decades until they're 40, when trooning is much less successful and they have a wife and a kid
I wish you a happy John 50, bro!

>>40404866 (OP)
you can't be molested into being trans. source? I've diddled dozens of boys over the years and not one of them has trooned out yet. almost all of them are straight even,

>>40405726
>you'll always be agp, it's a fundamental part of you.

Dumb. People move away from/change fetishes all the time. Even if he keeps that fetish he can at least develop new less destructive ones

>>40405057
чeгo нyнy тo блять

>>40405836
итc oyвep
pocтo ceмью нe нaчинaй, пoтoмy чтo y этoгo ecть гeнeтичecкий фaктop.
нy или ecли вce жe нaчнёшь ceмью тo cкaжи жeнe oб этих вoт вeщaх, чтoбы oнa знaлa c кeм пapтнёpcтвyeт:
> I've been gooning to sissy porn and imagining someone force-feminizing me

a, нy и нe зaбывaй, этo никoгдa нe yйдeт, ты бyдeшь бopoтьcя c этими вeщaми дo cмepти и c гoдaми oбычнo cтaнoвитcя cлoжнee

>>40405806
>People move away from/change fetishes
AGP is a hardwired immutable sexual orientation, it's not an acquired kink.