I thought I wrote off the idea of being trans a long time ago but it still deeply unsettles me that I might be "missing my chance" to transition as I get older.
I while back ago I read a comment on here that was something like "one day, after the collagen sets in and you start losing hair you'll be wishing you did it sooner."
The idea scares me. My hairline is already starting to recede at 22. I don't feel I have that pronounced a gender dysphoria, and think I could live my whole life as a man, but what if that's not the case? What if in 20 years, after I've married and had a family, it keeps popping up from time to time like clockwork?
Does it, in fact, get worse?
>>40490341 (OP)tf do they mean by "collagen sets in"? i thought females had less collagen than males
>>40490341 (OP)>My hairline is already starting to recede at 22Why are you zoomers so dysgenic? you already look 30 at 20s and 40 at mid 20s
>>40490341 (OP)>Does it, in fact, get worse?>>40490346read the full study. it fully explains how with every passing year the feelings get worse
>https://www.avitale.com/essays-details/?name=the-gender-variant-phenomenon--a-developmental-review-5#:~:text=Johnhere's a few excerpts.
early adulthood section:
>Another common attempt to "make it"- as a man by gender dysphoric males in this age range is to marry and have children>This logic, unfortunately, gets extended to the idea of having children. Although gender dysphoric males are generally no better or worse as fathers then the next man, they soon come to realize that what they had hoped would be an answer has instead complicated their gender issues enormously(1)
>>40490533>>For those who continue to struggle inwardly with their gender issues into mid-life, new issues come to the fore. As a time when most people realize that about half of life has been lived and feel the need to make an accounting of who they are and what they have done with their lives, this period can be especially anxiety provoking for the gender-dysphoric individual. Decades of trying to overcome an increasing gender expression deprivation anxiety begin to weigh heavily on the individual. Family and career are now as deeply rooted as they will ever be. The idea of starting over as a member of a different sex has become seemingly impossible. The fact that the need to change sex has increased rather than diminished, despite Herculean efforts, is now undeniable>These individuals often show up in therapy offices with symptoms mimicking Depression or Generalized Anxiety Disorder. They complain of panic attacks, irritability, sleeping disorder, inability to concentrate, and recent weight loss. If they are married, there is often serious martial discord due to self-imposed disassociation from the family unit. Job performance may also be affected, it is not uncommon the hear reports of individuals experiencing negative performance revues or outright threats of being fired unless they seek help for whatever is bothering them. Pressed ever deeper into despair, suicidal thoughts begin to intrude into daily life. Even at this point the individual may be reluctant to discuss their gender issues lest the door be opened to a fear-laden real-world exploration of gender transition. They are consumed by feelings of being inexorably trappednow to the older adult section
>Some gender dysphoric individuals proceed into their senior years with their needs and desires to be female still unresolved. Even now the natal male's feelings about the matter may be as strong as ever(2)
>>40490341 (OP)it gets worse and worse until you do something about it, unless maybe you make it to be old enough that sex hormones decline naturally, and even then...
>>40490541>Senior gender dysphoric males typically report they have been waiting, many since childhood in the hope that their desire to be female would simply "go away." Like those who are younger, they say in resignation that if they had known the dysphoria was going to remain such a strong force in their lives, they would have braved anything to face their dilemma decades sooner.>There is one other problem this population faces. In interviews, one gets the impression that the struggle to contain their gender expression deprivation anxiety--in and of itself--has become deeply ingrained in their psyche. It is as if the gender dysphoria has become a critical component of who they have become.just a few excerpts. as you can see, it only gets 100x worse with age until you sui or become a boomerhon
>>40490341 (OP)>>40490546>>40490550Okay yeah just as I thought. It stresses me out to think about but I guess I know the answer now
>>40490631just don't take any narrative without a grain of salt, do your "transition" your own way and whatever that means for you and take the whole dysphoria thing seriously without making too many assumptions about what might or might not qualify you for being "trans enough" or whatever
>>40490522it's drugs and alcohol, the majority of zoomers i know including me started smoking or drinking in middle school or earlier
It gets worse, I was able to express my femininity freely, only repressed "publicly"(not entirely) but privately I never stopped presenting female, clothes, accessories, behavior the whole thing, even had someone that encouraged me to do it but just the thought of knowing I could be doing more was hurtful.
When I came to the realization that it would never go away I tried to repress, threw away everything and even tried acting manlier, for a while that felt like a good decision as many around me cheered me for "finally" coming to my senses, I started hating everything about myself, didn't even take care of my body anymore, shaving with dull blades, cutting my hair short constantly, no sunscreen, left my feet unkempt, anything that felt "feminine" I stopped doing and even doing the contrary to become "rough".
I was a husk, nothing seemed to make me feel right, it was so bad that although everyone noticed it only one person suggested that I should go back to what I was, that there was no point in doing all of that if I was so miserable.
So I did and I've been slowly trying to salvage my body.
