i diyed twice at 15. now i'm going to commit suicide. i was detained for half a year, and gave up on myself. i wanted to start hrt every day of every year since and i didn't until i was 21.

i wish i was on 4chan back then. you would have called me retarded and i would have started diy when i got out at 16. all i needed was one person to ask me, hey, what the fuck are you doing? and i would be a woman.

i thought delaying didn't even matter that much. 18=21, right? now i'm a lateshit, not even a midshit.

15 16 17 18 19 20 21 so much of my life wasted.

i might commit suicide. i feel so bad i'm nauseous. i can't eat at all anymore. i'm crying nearly all of every day. please help me please help me

>>40575936 (OP)
if it makes you feel any better, it's all genetics
>t. facial hair and hrt at 15.

>>40575979
dont be fucking retarded anon obviously starting at 15 is better than 21

>>40575936 (OP)
age doesnt matter. what matters is when your puberty started, when it ended and if it was strong or not
felt the same way when i started hrt at 20

>>40575936 (OP)

I transitioned at 30 and pass. It's ALL genetics.

>>40576084
>>40576131

my puberty ended around 19 or 20. i had so many years when i wanted to start hrt before that hit me. the thing is i WANTED to start it. why didn't i have anyone to tell me to just fucking get a grip of myself and do it? i was paralysed and needed just one single friend to tell me to start doing diy again.

>>40576027
I mean it is, but i still get mogged by ppl that started at 19 with better genes (or i suppose worse genes for moids)

>>40576084
so true bestie, obviously someone whose puberty ended at 16 and transitioned at 18, and someone who has transitioned at 40 are both going to look identical when they are 50 years old. after all, 10 years is more than enough for every HRT change to fully take place and for your boobs to finish growing. there will obviously be no difference because both of these people transitioned post puberty!

here's my ugly fucking face. can someone tell me to either kill myself or that i'm being hysterical

>>40576388
lip lift and filler, browbone contouring, laser, ez

>>40576247
it gets better with time
>my puberty ended around 19 or 20.
unlikely. puberty usually ends at 15
>>40576323
be real, we are talking about 16 vs 21

>>40576388
your cute your fine
this is the point you need to girl exp and learn makeup and the such

>>40575979
Ick I feel bad for that I was a was and waited tell 16 but was still femboy tier then but I knew people who were straight up balding then as well which would be like the grimest of all tramny genes.

>>40576452
here. this is the only photo i have of me from when i was 15. it's a screenshot from a video i filmed while trying to bypass an identity check to get crypto for diy. the right is me at 21.

obviously i would have been a gigapassoid if i started on the left. my face was sooooo much smaller and more feminine. you can't see it but my bideltoid was several inches (at least 4) smaller, and i was also inches shorter.

>>40576610
ngl your not missing much,
These are the worst kind of brain worms

>>40576662
what do you mean i'm not missing much. you can just see how much fucking bigger and masculinised my face became. literally like an inch of bone added in all directions, around my eyes, on my jaw, to my cheeks, i feel rotten and disfigured.

>>40576610
im gonna be honest
>obviously i would have been a gigapassoid if i started on the left.
you wouldnt

>>40576131
this, and I was 39 when I transitioned! voice gets a bit harder the longer you wait, but I 100% pass. I have people who literally don't believe I'm trans. natlie mars didnt trans until she was in her 30's either

theres a few bonuses i think from waiting to transition..

also... please don’t harm yourself. we love you. so don’t let the hate or this materialistic world make you forget:
you’re a beautiful angel, and this world needs you

>>40576722
>>obviously i would have been a gigapassoid if i started on the left.

maybe not then idk it would still have been a world of a difference. my body passes a lot so if i were that much smaller i would so much happier. when i epilate (i can't rn i'm waiting for laser) i get gendered correctly, and cis people don't clock photos of me that look better than the one i posted.

you can't tell me that the difference between the left and the right isn't big enough that the me on the left was ngmi. be serious......

>>40576900
im not saying youd be clocky if you started before, im saying you wouldnt be unclockable
obviously there would be some difference but what the other anon said is true, youre not missing much, it wouldnt be a world of a difference like youre thinking

>>40576900
you dont pass theyre just being polite

>>40577081
i don't think my face passes at all. i say my body passes because i get hit on or harassed by guys a lot up until they see my face.

when i say i get gendered correctly when i epilate it means people aren't treating me with open contempt

>>40577172
work on your energy, body language, facial expressions etc., trust me, its rarely how you look and almost always a skills issue

>>40577206
why would it not be about how you look, what the fuck

>>40577253
dont listen to trannies for passing advice theyre all autistic and faceblind

>>40577253
it can be, but usually its not. ive seen cis girls with facial hair and stuff. personality hits harder than anything

>>40576788
>>40576131
delusional boomerhons

>>40576610
your going to be a hon now, befoe you would not have passed though. But would of been beter

>>40577362
im literally a portrait artist lol

>>40576388
what would make you believe in yourself? if nothing then theres no need of listening to others opinions

>>40577382
delusional retard who only accepts evidence that supports your bias narrative

>>40576388
Can you get approved for ffs?

>>40577535

i would feel better if:

someone told me that they've seen other trans women who started my age (21) end up looking normal or not like a fucking ogre, without also saying something completely fucking insane tucute/honfidence style (maybe you're in the 1%! it's fine to start when you're 40! looks don't matter! just be confident!)

someone acknowledging that the photo on the right is so much worse but that things can still end up ok anyway. that my weakness to not retransition earlier didn't turn me into a hon for the rest of my life

someone calling me a twinkhon instead of a normal hon, or saying i'm gonna be a semi-passoid when i've been on hrt longer

>>40576388
here's some nicer photos of me. i don't need compliments for them i'll just feel better knowing they're up in the same thread as this one when i go to sleep

>>40577650
I kinda like the shorter hair actually, I feel like the tomboy look can cover up some of the natural nonpassingness

>>40577650
You pass in these two, not in any others you've sent. You just need to get rid off the facial hair, don't epilate, do laser or you'll ruin your skin for a temporary relief. And with dark hair you need permanent removal for sure.

You're not hopeless you'll pass np. Maybe not without bangs though if your brow line is fucked. When people talk about mannerisms etc theyre not hugboxxing you the thing is you're andro/fem already but if you act awkward or have a male voice you insta fail to pass. You have to be seriouslyyyyy fem for just your looks to be enough.

Also you were not cute at 15, you wouldn't have been a gigapassoid like you imagine. Age doesn't matter, puberty stages and bone structure do when it comes to age of transition and yours was already set by then. Not cooked, but not too different from now. You'll be cute just have patience and save up for FFS you already pass visually.

>>40577650
wtf ok nevermind youre cute as fuck

>>40575936 (OP)
same, idk

>>40577650
>>40577695
like unironically these pics give me so much hope for myself

>>40577692
i suddenly feel like 10 million times better. i have facial shadow in the first one because i'm waiting for my first laser appointment. i took that photo on the spot so i didn't pick a "nice" one to hide my masculinity. it also probably looks worse because of the sobbing + not eating, so i wasn't helping myself i guess.

i got given the worst haircut of my fucking life a few days ago which is when the crashout started. hopefully i'll have functional bangs again by the time lectures start...

i hope i can get ffs. i'm only 7 months on hrt so, maybe i'll be able to get it within a year even

>>40575936 (OP)
Rope, it was always over for you. Zoomies have 0 grit. Instead of
>I'm going to make the best of my situation even if it's not an ideal outcome. I may not like the hand I was dealth but I'm going to see it through to the end
it's always
>waaah feel sorry for me i have all the information in the world at my disposal and can order ANYTHING to my door but it's still over never even started
grow up. You're in your 20s, life has just begun

>>40577536
There is no evidence. Neither of you posted pics.

>>40577620

I think your self perception is lower than the ground, and you should seek therapy to first fix that, If you think anything good people say about you is hugboxing of course you will wanna kill yourself bae, but ima tell you, most people dont care enough to hug box so even in a world full of honmaxing the dick pics are at least real <3

>>40576388
Are you seriously going to rope because of this you look fine just keep transitioning

>>40575936 (OP)
>i was detained
you have to go back

>>40578348

And to add to my previous comment:

i have so many more masculine features than you and I still got to pass so you have a better starting ground than I did

>>40577650
ya stfu, you look fine attention whore or masochist :P