Anonymous
8/5/2025, 10:29:31 AM No.40613093
keeping this short
I grew up with him, he's basically my older brother.
I genuinely think I've had a crush on him at some point (before you judge, I've always had a weird relationship with romantic feelings but I won't explain that here. Also, I was 5)
We lost touch after he went to uni.
I still see him sometimes when I eat at my grandparents, which is super awkward because I we used to be so close and now we don't even talk. I can't even look at him in the eyes. Worst thing is, even if we did become friends again I don't think I'd enjoy talking to him, he's a total normie.
It only got worse when I realized I'm a trans man (around 12)
He is everything I want to be
He's a better version of me
We've always looked identical
He's smarter, richer, taller, more manly and beautiful than me, even personality wise he is so much better
Idk how to cope honestly, I feel like busting into tears every time I see him
I'm so proud of him and I can't stand to look in the mirror because I'm nothing like him.
how do I get over the fact that I'll never be him? For now the only thing that helps is telling myself to suck it up because yearning over someone this much is woman behavior but seriously every time I think about him I feel something eating me me from the inside like a cancer it hurts
I grew up with him, he's basically my older brother.
I genuinely think I've had a crush on him at some point (before you judge, I've always had a weird relationship with romantic feelings but I won't explain that here. Also, I was 5)
We lost touch after he went to uni.
I still see him sometimes when I eat at my grandparents, which is super awkward because I we used to be so close and now we don't even talk. I can't even look at him in the eyes. Worst thing is, even if we did become friends again I don't think I'd enjoy talking to him, he's a total normie.
It only got worse when I realized I'm a trans man (around 12)
He is everything I want to be
He's a better version of me
We've always looked identical
He's smarter, richer, taller, more manly and beautiful than me, even personality wise he is so much better
Idk how to cope honestly, I feel like busting into tears every time I see him
I'm so proud of him and I can't stand to look in the mirror because I'm nothing like him.
how do I get over the fact that I'll never be him? For now the only thing that helps is telling myself to suck it up because yearning over someone this much is woman behavior but seriously every time I think about him I feel something eating me me from the inside like a cancer it hurts
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