Prev. >>24483445

I have not mentally left the 1960's.
I was born in 1992.

I tried getting more involved in church stuff, but I think church is fundamentally for normies. All of the girls I went on dates with rejected me, I always feel like an outsider, all of my friends have girlfriends and I'm the only single person left in my friend group. It's even worse when your friends all pressure you to become a monk or a priest, as if that is what I want to do with my life. Although I'm a Catholic, I don't really see that as something desirable.

I have 2 friends in total.
After my friend of 15 years ghosted me( did not expect that in the slightest) and one of my 2 friends moved cities cause of work i thought i need to reach out to some of my old acquintances since this is getting dangerously lonely. One of them ghosted me after he sent me his phone number and i messaged him on his phone. Admittedly he messaged me half a year ago but i didnt respond cause i was kinda scared of meeting him cause he is kind of mentally ill, amoral and comes from a messed up family. I did message him after my friend left the city cause i was desperate but yeah he ignored me. The other one also sent me his phone number and he didnt respond to my latest message for 2 days now.
I really dont know why this is happening, im always a good friend to everyone and i never abuse friendships or people
But like my dad said, maybe they hang out with people out of interest, and for friendship part they already got that covered with others. Normal people lead busy lives and they probably dont care that much about hanging with me cause they think that they cant gain anything out of it

have you ever decided to opt out of life? if yes, why? have you ever opted back in? if so, how?

>>24488532
I had small glimpses of that thought, in my darkest moments, but to be frank, no, I never opted for that. It's not about saying that life is beautiful and good and worth living, it's just that it's absurd, ridiculous, ugly and I feel privileged to experience this absurdity with at least some human reason. I'm atheist, I have no idea about post-death experience. It's so crazy that anything exists at all. I'm not afraid of death, nor do I look forward to it, I'd like to postpone it the best I can, almost like an investigation into what the fuck this is all about.

>>24488242
Real friendship is rare. To have two real friends is a blessing.

People often mistake acquaintances for friends, and social pressure to overuse the term "friend" doesn't help. Transactional relationships are with "acquaintances," even with friendly behavior and frequent interaction.

>>24488212 (OP)
Life is but a dream when it isn't a nightmare. The world is not of this world.

I took some LSD and went to a park. The trees, the grass, the insects, the trillions of bacteria and other microbes... I can’t understand why any of this is happening. There are so many people out there, so many whose lives are long gone. What difference did they make? Then you look up at the sky and there are trillions upon trillions of galaxies. There’s no trace of order, direction, meaning, or story that could encompass it all.

The acid state of mind is bizarre. The day felt like an entire week, sometimes enjoyable, sometimes I just wanted it to end, as if I could fast-forward to sobriety. At moments, I felt like I was in a movie, as if my entire life up to this point had been nothing but a strange dream. A dream that shaped my personality, named my acquaintances, and gave me a repertoire of stories and events, ordinary, but mine.

But why am I not dreaming all of this at once? Why am I not the microbe, the insect, the bird, the eight billion people in one single experience, the function of the machine we all are parts of? Why am I not you? How can you (which is your "I") see me? If the subjectivity of the other is not experienced by me, can it be said to exist at all?

Where are the dead in all this? Where do I put my sorrow for those who’ve passed? How can something simply never happen again? How can we sustain life’s absurdity if not by expecting it to flash again before our eyes, giving it some meaning, some narrative that explains its countless nuances? I don’t think so. I think it’s total madness and chaos. One day I’ll die and be no more. I don’t think we have souls. I don’t think the ego survives without the brain. And yet, it’s equally absurd that this mind holds the camera of my perception.What are we of service to the world if we can't save each other from vanishing? Long lives, short lives. Happy lives, sad lives. They are all of the same size. All is futile.

>>24488235
I know I have basically nothing in common with anyone at my parish but faith and I feel conspicuously out of place there. I'm probably the only man in his 20s there who isn't there with family members. feels weird but hey gotta do what I believe. i don't think they have a church that's exclusively for social retards whose families don't go anymore.

my parents have started sharing boomerslop stuff like "omg this inventor secretly cured cancer with radio waves and government agents hate him!!!" tier stuff, as well as retarded american politics celebs like kirk (we are not american)

I could see my mom getting into that kind of thing so its whatever, but it was heartbreaking to see my dad share some of this kind of thing. for some reason I just thought he would be above that sort of thing

>>24488792
LSD is kind of a messed up drug honestly.

>>24488212 (OP)
Based Teddy. I've always been tempted to attempt a teddy-larp, just to see what happens lol

I wish I were dead but Im alive just to suffer.

>>24488212 (OP)
Gore Vidal always called Teddy a sissy. I think he believed his entire persona was trying to over compensate for his intrinsic lack of masculinity. He basically committed genocide in the Philippines. He's definitely an interesting case study.

The modern west is a battleground between nature and nurture. You either spend a lifetime being at war with everything you are taught and told to believe by society, or a lifetime being at war with your instincts and visceral reactions.

>>24490045
I chose the former as soon as I was barely sentient.

>>24490038
There is a case for that. Now, we do know Teddy was a weakling growing up and had to build himself from the ground up, so it is no surprise he could be accused of 'being what a weak man thinks a strong man is'.

>>24490057
> being what a weak man thinks a strong man is
That is?

>>24488792
i actually think psychedelics are more dangerous than uppers like cocaine. because it affects your perception, and people should be protective of their vision. almost everyone on them comes out with this kind of boring, pedestrian insight. the spiritual type drugs can actually change you, coke is like a harmless bit of fun.

>>24490045
The historical tradition is that through the 1800s, the scholars and leaders beleived that the West was at the center of God's plan. Western civilization was considered a more advanced stage of human development. This was considered practically un-disputable at the time. This justified the taking of lands and the genocide of natives was seen as a by-product of progress and ultimately their own fault because they refused or couldn't adapt. All of course a part of God's plan. WWI and WW2 shattered that belief.

What has happend since then is an attempt to take the percieved "good" of the historical legacy and somehow modernize and sanitize it. In other words, we'll import immigrants but still sing the "Pledge of Alleigance" or "God Save the Queen." It comes across as farcical and schitzophrenic. In the event we don't manage to destroy the planet, I think the future looks even more dystopic. The good jobs will be held by the chosen ones who will not need to have any real skills - only to look the part since they can be aided by AI and an army of serfs.

>>24490101
True. Last weekend I went out with a couple friends of mine. They all decided to take MDMA except me. Fast forward a couple hours later, they all turned into a bunch of emotional faggots.

>>24490120
md is an upper

>>24490101
if you think psychedelics are dangerous, you are afraid to learn about yourself.

truly pathetic.

>>24490135
are you using it like a treatment because you're not happy with your own perception

>>24490141
my perception on drugs is still my perception. I value it more as it is disconnected from my sober fantasies of fitting into society.
being a junkie makes me free! also, doing anything creative while on drugs makes whatever youre making faaar better than it could be.

>>24490133
In turns you into an emotional faggot who is in love with everything.

>>24490181
cringe and weak. I rather do opiates any time. couldnt stand being that vulnerable around someone else, even if it entails sex.

>>24488212 (OP)
There aren't enough people working stupid unskilled jobs like Walmart. The valid lives of worthless npcs should suck more. Instead they work office or some shit, inflating their egos, making them think their idiotic opinions are worth anything.

>>24490185
t. neet

>>24490145
yet everyone who takes them veers to the exact same 'we're all one, reality is chaos, nothing matters' epiphany, don't they? it's textbook. you're not seeing more truth - you're seeing differently. and the aesthetics too are always the same. trippy colours, swirling fractals, melting faces ... looks dumb to anyone in their right mind.

>>24490192
t. normgroid complaining about living in a society

>>24490193
>you're not seeing more truth - you're seeing differently.
thats the normies youre talking about. im nothing like them and am awesome. and LOL at that aesthetics comment. yeah it is cringe, but id rather take a heroic dose of acid and think about my autistic special interests for 8 hours rather than take MDMA and have sex like a primal thoughtless animal and giving myself to someone to be taken advantage of.

>>24489663
>>24490101
It is dangerous like camping is dangerous.

The pedestrian insight is what comes out in language, it's a simple deep feeling that is impossible to shake off. It's like saying "the universe is crazy", it's vague, silly, but it encapsulates my sentiment very well.

It's weird to think I was one day a kid and I had a dog. Now it's been longer since that dog died than the time I was with him. One day I'll grow old and my 20s and 30s will too look like a distant dream.

>>24490195
here's an epiphany the psychedelics haven't bestowed yet: your primal wisdom is far greater than any intellect.
>taken advantage of
would never get that with the CIA mind control drug!

>>24490197
It's not the insight that is cringe, but the fact that you had to take pschycs to realize that what makes it cringe. Like woo, the universe is crazy, like it takes LSD to realize that, it makes you look like stupid retard.

>>24490184
an english poet once said

Whistle, and Love will come to you,
Hiss, and he fades without a word

Edging wrecks my sleep but nothing else makes me feel alive anymore.

>>24490202
>would never get that with the CIA mind control drug!
men on MDMA only want sex. id rather pry ones brain. and no, noone will take advantage of me given I am not on Xanax or something, sexually or intellectually.
i have fun with my lizard brain, but I dont like worldly desires that comes from my "primal wisdom". it is lame and senseless.
>>24490207
fuck love man....

>>24490197
well this is kind of what i'm getting at. most drug-induced meaning is ... recycled. also as we can see in >>24490195, rebellious drug talk often comes with a self-important sameness. even the claim to uniqueness is typical.

>>24490254
schopenhauer said sexual passion is the kernel of the will to live.
nature created man, and nature is superior.

>>24490265
I think me seeing myself as superior comes from the fact that I frequent websites like this (I am very smart) as I was narcissistic before I started doing drugs.
also, there is a reason I am telling you that I see myself like that. I am undoubtedly more complex than a 30 year old family man doing coke, it is easy to see. I do think that I am better, but I also see the humor on admitting that. if I was as evil as id like to be, I wouldnt let anyone know that thought of mine.
>>24490268
>/ourguy/ said so
how original.
as schopy said, morality stems from compassion to one another (or whatever.). id value ones views and understanding of life over primal instincts. we are humans for a reason.

>>24490268
And the sexual instinct also created the primary human institution, which is the family.

>>24490274
the instinct is pre-rational, supra-rational. naturally, the pursuit of beauty and love is completely under the governance of the reproductive aim. the individual here is acting, without knowing it, by order of something higher than himself.
>said so
he said so in a very captivating way as well:

>It is the cause of war and the end of peace, the basis of what is serious and the aim of the jest, the inexhaustible source of wit, the key to all allusions, the meaning of all mysterious hints, of all unspoken offers and all stolen glances, the daily meditation of the young, and often also of the old, the hourly thought of the unchaste, and even against their will the constantly recurring imagination of the chaste, the ever ready material of a joke, just because the profoundest seriousness lies at its foundation. It is, however, the piquant element and the joke of life that the secret concern of all men is secretly pursued and ostensibly ignored as much as possible. But, in fact, we see it every moment seat itself, as the true and hereditary lord of the world, out of the fulness of its own strength, upon the ancestral throne ...

>>24488212 (OP)
my dad really likes Teddy Roosevelt

>>24490290
>the individual here is acting, without knowing it, by order of something higher than himself.
that is the exact thing I fucking hate.
i hate the performance that is to be loved. to act like the person which is nothing but a fantasy of someone's ideation of (You). vice versa.
i find more passionate feel in understanding someone.
I believe Hegel went:
>blah blah blah, in the presence of other
when it comes to the dialectic between the master and slave.
so, master wants to be recognized as the master yadi yada. why cant people just be people and we try to understand one another at their core?

>>24490303
what i meant there is it's not on a conscious level, but an unconscious one. reproduction is the ultimate purpose of every organism, and its strongest instinct; for only so can the will conquer death. and to ensure this conquest of death, the will to reproduce is placed almost entirely beyond control of knowledge or reflection: hence even a philosopher, occasionally, has children.

>understand one another at their core
i.e. love. love is really a recognition of truth, a recognition of another person’s integrity and truth in a way that… makes both of you light up when you recognise the quality in the other. that’s what love is. It’s a recognition of singularity

if i was as evil as i'd like to be i'd unleash my bottomless wells of venom over your compulsion to pepper your posts with lame unfunny 4chan memes

>>24488212 (OP)
Thomas Carlyle was a man who, though correct in all his critiques of modernity and yearning for a higher principle, just barely missed the connecting flight to the realm of real tradition - and everything he proposed as a way to right society as a result became the worst form of counter-tradition possible. He was right about everything the Jews were up to, but foolishly thought "just give them Palestine already!" was somehow a solution instead of merely providing them with a literal supervillain base free of charge from which to stage all their subversion. He attacked the "Gospel of Mammonism" and capitalist greed, yet his idea of a return to a sort of aristocracy was holding up "captains of industry" (undoubtedly due to a close personal friendship with and bias towards many contemporaries he viewed as such) - in practice, preaching a mere revolt of the Vaisya caste as a solution to the ills of the modern laborer, in the very same book in which he presciently comments that there is no Morrison's Pill to fix an England already in the sickbed. I would say that he'd be turning in his grave had he been around to see Yiddish Yarvin preaching corruptions of his ideas to further ossify societal decay, but the fact of the matter is that his ideas were corrupted from the start - Scotsmen have, of course, always been the Jews of the British Isles, dating back to the days of William Wallace.

>>24490332
>i.e. love. love is really a recognition of truth
thats not how normies love. they create an idealized version of you in their minds and create invalid expectations.
yoooure wrong

>>24488212 (OP)
You hate immigrants because they are brown and muslim.
I hate immigrants because they are immigrants.
We are not the same.

>>24490422
hesiod and parmenides said very significantly that eros (god of carnal love) is the first, the creator, the principle from which all things proceed. love always starts off with primal sex, then gets refined and refined. it's ultimately dependent on the body.

>>24490441
I guess I am just too autistic to relate to that. I get sex is awesome, but there are better things

>>24490445
there is a brief and informative bit in the rubaiyat that claims that a man in the arms of a woman is as close to god as he is ever likely to be this side of the grave.

>>24490038
>>24490057
That loses a whole lot of punch considering that Gore was himself a literal homosexual who called everyone he disagreed with a Nazi yet went into seething damage control mode when Buckley rightly told him "stfu queer" in response. Comes off as a bucket crab mentality from a lifelong weakling hating on someone who strove to improve himself

>>24490450
I agree. but faith nor love, they arent as conventional to a loner like me as science or philosophy is. I dont want to give into that fuzzy warm feeling, it is too.. easy.

>>24490481
that is a critical, not poetic idea. it's fatal to lose touch with the ideas of mystery, grace and love that originally informed our spirit: intellect and habit starve out imagination.

>>24490493
i am not trying to be poetic. id be a "romantic" like you are if I was. I am much more legitimate.
though I feel I could learn a lot from someone like you.

>>24488212 (OP)
Jews undeniably control the world via Vanguard, Black Rock, and Palantir. All three of those are related. Anyone who still denies this is retarded. This is truly the Kali Yuga.
Only solution is other races working to improve relations against a common enemy at this point imo. The amount of damage Jews are causing is not really up to dispute anymore. From mass migration to bombing innocent civilians in countries, Jews are over the top evil. Cyrus truly made a mistake, I feel like I can't breathe from a stagnant air of evil that is suffocating this world.

>>24490500
>I am much more legitimate.
a revealing tidbit, since legitimate and legal share a root word (circling back to your 'sober fantasies of fitting into society')

>>24488212 (OP)
Jews undeniably control the world via Vanguard, Black Rock, and Palantir. All three of those are related. Anyone who still denies this is retarded. This is truly the Kali Yuga.
Only solution is other races working to improve relations against a common enemy at this point imo. The amount of damage Jews are causing is not really up to dispute anymore. From mass migration, human & organ trafficking, promoting vice via media, to bombing innocent civilians in countries, Jews are over the top evil. Cyrus truly made a mistake, I feel like I can't breathe from a stagnant air of evil that is suffocating this world.

>>24490520
hahahaha :D armchair are we

>>24488792
i always think about this part, how it's weird that i'm only experiencing this one body at this one exact time. makes me want to skip work lol

kind of makes me think we live in hell, cause my idea of hell would be to live in the most beautiful world, with the greatest pleasures easily available, and an infinite number of the most interesting people ever to talk to, but I have to spend my time performing pointless tasks for most of the day, with no change in sight

>>24490524
if you reread your posts with a more sensible frame of mind one day you might pick up on some pretty clear insecurities (esp considering most of what i've said has basically been an at-arms-length putdown).

>>24490197
It's interesting to see you write about your dog that way. I lost a close friend when I was in college, and I sometimes think about it in the same way. The day when he'd been dead longer than I'd known him was a pretty hard one. I'm coming close to the day when he'll have been dead longer than he'd been alive. It's pretty hard to think about sometimes.

>>24490521
> Let me explain to you how this brown desert tribe who was slaves to Africans control the whole planet

>>24490537
>haha well shucks you really think little old me could do all that? :^)
nice try

>>24488212 (OP)
> White Christian Europeans start an invasive war against white Christian Europeans on the continent of Europe
Normgroids three years later: Oh No! Anyways ..
> Brownshits of Jewish faith start a non-invasive war against brownshits of Islamic faith in the Middle East
Normgroids 1 day later: everyone run, WW3 has started and the world is about to end! Billions will die!

I think im suffering from long lasting delusions spanning months where I make eveything I have to do extremely overcomplicated and hard (tasks for myself or assignments from uni/work). And then when its over I get a glimpse of how easy it could have been and then it starts all over again.

I'm >>24488792

>>24490265
>rebellious drug talk
>self-important sameness
>claim to uniqueness

I don’t know where you got that from what I said. I don’t think you need LSD to arrive at these banal thoughts—that’s not the main point I was making. I was simply providing context for my post to the fellow anons. Those who’ve experimented with psychedelics will understand what I mean, but it’s not exclusive to that. It’s a universal feeling—something people might associate with existentialist philosophers, or maybe Shakespeare, or Daoism, or LSD… In other words, it manifests in different ways.

The psychedelic experience just draws my attention to the raw perceptual sensation of being alive, not so much to the political or scientific aspects of life’s absurdity. I’m sorry if it’s not your cup of tea, but that’s not a problem for me.

Life just seems like a series of chapters (modes of attention, ethos, I don’t know what to call them). At any given time, some situation is set: you’re either working or having sex, or thinking, you’re either a kid, an adult, or an old person, eating well or hungry, worried or relaxed. When we’re kids, bright colors on television and warriors with swords are enough to entertain us. Then we need more, suddenly we’re paying taxes and planning our financial future. Then I’m high on acid at 3 PM. Then I’m married. Then divorced. Then I’m a very old man shitting my diapers if lucky enough to survive until then. The acid experiences enhances this sensation and makes you put things in perspective, that's all. I'm having this feeling throughout the whole week, even while sober.

>>24490534
Yeah, I'm doing dishes and wondering how it got to this. I don't understand why we are all one person each and not everything together as a massive consciousness experiencing everything all at once.

>>24490536
Sorry to hear that. It hurts like hell to think of what we lost. So much so I don't know what to do with the feeling.

>>24490638
f a m, you can have these thoughts from ... a cigarette. without the insufferable profundity.
what i meant all along by self-important sameness was the exact same spiritual performance you see across so many of these posts - solemn, vague, reverent - delivered in a dry, humourless tone so absorbed in itself that it forgets its audience has heard the same song played better a hundred times before. 'crazy how we die and nothing matters? and yet… here i am. perceiving it all.'

Nooo ;_;

I reject your reality and substitute it for my own.

Pale skin. Skinny. Jet black hair. Big tits. Blue eyes. That's my type. I'm not much of ab ass man. A cute little but is enough.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kANZdIEqnKM
tf is this

Fear, lust and anger probably predate almost all other human emotions. Even love and sadness.

Talking to randoms about politics is such a waste of fucking time
I fucking give up this shit is pointless no one ever learns anything.
It's all just manipulation.

I just soaked my sausage in 160,000 scoville hot sauce and endured an hour of birth-level genital agony without much difficulty. And I knew I what I was getting into: this isn't my first weenie roast.
The pain is rapidly subsiding now after an hour of extreme pain.
I close my eyes and meditate on the pain, forging extreme endurance to it.
I dare you to try the weenie roast challenge.
You'll probably vomit and scream like a bitch lol.

>>24488242
The last man wrote this post

>>24491541
357,000 scoville actually.

>>24490556
I'm gonna invade your house and take residency there and see how you like it

>>24490445
I have autism too but I have a working dick unlike you.

Why are LEGO so VERY expensive? Because there's a kind of religion around any parts-based system. Any parts-based system naturally develops an accretion of gatekeepers, in a tarot sense the journeyman becomes a mysterious and powerful figure, a dangerous one, with the jealousies and caprices of Vulcan himself, Deprived of his volcanic rage, left in the vicinity of pizza delivery boys and hula girls, he creates a new volcano.

>>24490135
I'm on antipsychotics. That's a big no no in my case unless I want to get locked up in an institution

Things that are truly beautiful and majestic almost always come off somewhat fearsome as well. Lions, birds of prey, women...

I guess the reason I believe in God is because I have at all times the vision of Beauty within me. An inner sun glimpsed from the depths of a cave of the deep mountains. The center of a hollow Earth. It seems utterly ridiculous to claim that beauty has no existence of its own; it is with me always, a light just beyond the corner of my eye. And this light is utterly removed from the world of the senses and the body, yet all things in some way reflect it. Belief in God? This is just the first step, the doorway to the beyond.
I know I'm getting a little flowery here but it's hard to put any other way. I wish you guys could see it too.

>>24488212 (OP)
I am now experiencing genuine rage against hew haters, chuds, reactionaries, etc
I was one of them by birth until I was like 15 when I started slowly abandoning it. I unironically thought of myself as a “national socialist” until I was like 17. And that was after two years of deprogramming myself
but I still mainly visit corners of the internet infested with these people
at first I didn’t think about it because I hadn’t been brainwashed to hate hitler or whatever. Then I started to view you people as simply stupid.
But now I get physically angry every time one of you faggot start speaking. I don’t think I’ll be using the internet much longer now that reactionary nonsense is unavoidable everywhere.

>>24491515
Understandable. But I also write about it, and engaging in a dialogue and discourse helps me uncover arguments I could use to tie together a thesis.

>>24491591
When I was 15 I was a neocon. I didn't become genuinely reactionary in a troublesome sense until I was 32. Nowadays everyone pointing daggers at the United States (even people here) is causing me to retreat a bit. Still find modern women problematic though.

I am retarded, a big dumb retard

>>24491596
> When I was 15 I was a neocon.
grim

I've always had a sweet spot, but I've pretty much always hung around people who were rude or edgy, and I never could last with the other sweeties. But I didn't "run with a wild crowd" or anything, I had never been attracted to wildness, I was already suffering from my own recklessness.

>>24491591
any kind of political extremism is wack. i was one of those annoying marxists in college, mainly cuz after bush did iraq i got into the anti-war movement which is full of communists trying to recruit young people who don't know any better. don't get me wrong it was fun going to conferences and workshops and shit in the city, and going to d.c. to march around yelling shit, but eventually you have to grow up. i can't take anyone seriously who legitimately thinks a command economy is going to outperform a free market nor anyone who thinks stateless chaos is going to be better than having accountability.

How do you stop missing someone?

>>24491659
i wish i could miss someone but i'm so alienated i haven't felt that in a long time

>>24491644
Did you at least get some pinko ass? Can't see any reason besides pussy nowadays to get involved in politics, honestly.

>>24491612
Blame my boomer father's influence and inability to make friends because of autism. I was an extremely despised individual on the early internet scene.

>>24491668
Writing stuff I'd say is kind of one, too.

>>24491644
So you generally agree with people like Arthur Schlesinger Jr. and Richard Hofstadter regarding the "vital center" argument?

>>24491644
I remember Occupy Wall Street and thought it was a bunch of snobby overeducated college kids bitching about first world problems meanwhile I was mopping up dirt off floors in Goodwill making minimum wage. I didn't get it at all.

>>24491688
occupy wall street was all kids who graduated into the recession like i did with nothing to do, but by then i was already on the way out of leftism

>>24491695
I couldn't afford college then. It was priced out of my range and I didn't qualify for grants then. That's why I saw it as "first world problems"

>>24491688
That seemed like a big inflection point for American conservativsm because the Che Guevara shirt wearing international rabble of Bush hating liberals suddenly had this moment of appearing powerless and kind of just crustpunky. The validity of the Bush hatred era seemed to kind of putter out and die on the wings of Occupy Wallstreet, and opened the door for the moderate Chicago-style liberalism that gave us 8 years of Blagojevich's man, Mr. O.

>>24491677
idk i never really read any of that mainstream boomer stuff, not dissing it, just not my bag. i guess i'd say fukuyama is a lot more right than he's wrong. fukuyama with a side of "why nations fail" i suppose. right now i'm listening to mancur olson's "rise and decline of nations" (it was $2 on audible, ok) and it's p good so far.

>>24491667
Do you literally lurk in these threads responding to every single person’s posts with some no-caps low-effort bullshit within minutes? Go away.

>>24491698
I would never have been caught dead wearing a Che shirt then and even now. Because I was (and still kind of am) into alt scenes like grunge, metal and hardcore this didn't endear me well to the rest of the scene.

>>24491705
yeah cuz i'm procrastinating on doin sth productive, maybe the person u miss wouldn't have ghosted u if u weren't so rude, just a thought

>>24491699
Right now I'm basically a space cadet researching the history of ideas and Axial Age transformations and possibly reading more about millenarianism in history.

im telling this woman we are soulmates and she agrees. im in trouble because she is in a long term relationship. but i dont care, I want her... I dont forsee this ending well... oh well

>>24491723
are u the guy divorcing his wife cuz some chick at work said she liked your hobbies? i hope u keep us updated cuz i wanna know how this plays out, my guess it won't end well, but let's watch history unfold, we can learn from u vicariously

>>24491714
Funnily enough, the person I’m talking about wasn’t fucking insufferable and boring like you.

>>24491723
I was in love with my soulmate for a long time, but she has chosen her addiction so many times. I thank her for that honestly because we don't live in legends for a reason. She was worth loving then. And now I just look forward to the next chapter.

I want to get my ass pounded

>>24491739
my problem is she has a boyfriend. im stealing her from him. haha!

>>24491742
As in beat up or sexed?

>>24491746
People like you is why I stay out of relationships. Gutter dwelling sewer rat behavior.

>>24491751
its the law of the jungle anon... nobody can stop me. im going to do WHAT I WANT TO DO! I want her. I don't give a damn about ANYTHING else.

>>24491779
I'm going to turn you into a hamburger

>>24491644

I see the same issues even though I'm becoming more and more leftist this past year. Though I would say we don't really have the test data for free markets always performing better than command economies. Logic dictates that an economy which works explicitly to move people out of poverty and improve living standards will do just that. For me it's hard to buy the reverse trickle down logic of neocon liberalism

>>24491591
> was one of them by birth until I was like 15 when I started slowly abandoning it

I just assume that anyone who unironically calls themselves a national socialist is 15 year old. That would explain the things they type out.

>>24491782
bring it on

>>24491795
What about 15 year old neocons like I was?

Humans are just fleshy doughnuts.

>>24491798
Mutt programming. Nothing one can do

cheating with a married woman is a literary pursuit... a sentimental education

>>24491803
Well I grew out of it eventually towards greener pastures. I'm a writer and a thinker now. Though my work is pretty much piecemeal.

>>24491807
You touch my future wife I'm roasting your internal organs

Why did this have to happen to me?

I have made my mistakes.

>>24491815
you wont do anything. im better.

>>24491868
better at being gay maybe

How do you read a book? Not like literacy but how do you actually learn to digest a book? Is it by reading more? Or by living more so what you read reflects your experience?
are there books on this?

>>24491836
you can always make more

>>24491930
Best way for me is reinforcing my memory by recalling what I read through discussions with family or other people

>>24491876
gottem

My nickname amongst the girls in college was Hogan.

How come I get random boners in public all the time? Literally every time I go out. But I don't get random boners in my home.

>>24491947
I was thinking that. I was going to start trying to have reading date nights with my girlfriend so I could just talk about it while reading next to her.

>>24488212 (OP)
This female friend of mine remarked several times I had gained weight last time we met, and looked healthier. I don't really know what exactly she was trying to do that time.

>>24491981
I can't tell if she was bitter I accidentally implied she was fat that one time or what.

It is amazing how Stephen Miller is just an absolute motherfucker. The man will bend Heaven and Earth to deal with illegals. Forget Vance, forget Rubio, maybe MILLER should be President after Trump. He seems to know how to get things done in Washington. It's to the point that I don't even care he's a Jew.

>>24491982
Sounds like she was just trying to be nice.

>>24491981
She's a chubby chaser. If you are willing to weigh 300 pounds or more, she will fuck you.

>>24488235
I feel the same. My church is filled with conventionally nice people, but I have nothing in common with them. I'm the only single guy in my group too. It gets boring thirdwheeling or talking about boring ass watercooler stuff all the time. Good luck discussing anything literary or art related beyond Tolkien and CS Lewis. Maybe Dostoy if you're lucky, but it's only Brothers K. I get lonely and am hoping there's some Christian girl out there who also feels the same, but damn do I not enjoy being around the equivalent of golden retrievers all the time.

>Indian-Pakistani 4th war
>>CANCELLED
>TAIWAN INVASION
>>HIATUS
>Iran-USA War
>>CANCELLED
>>ONLY HOLOLS AND ZIGGERS ARE KILLING EACH ORTHER FOR SOME RETARDED TOWNS BY TRILLONS OF LOSSESS

apologize to fukuyama san

Vending machines have an ethereal vibe amongst them.

Nothing beats running into one in a random hallway, or somewhere outside; in a hotel next to an ice machine, or even in your local rec center beside a snack machine.

If theres one thing that unites us as humans, it's s vending machines, they're just ambiguous enough to be in congress buildings but not to ominous to be seen in highschools, colleges, and universities.

The nature of the vending machine can never be matched and I can totally see them outliving most of us.

I wouldnt be surprised if they end up on spaceships and space stations thousands of years into the future.

>>24492007
I just straight up want to destroy this man and his diagnosis. If Fukuyama were standing in front of me my urge to murder him would be very high. And there's a part of me that wants to end the end of history regardless of cost, even if that cost would be an ocean of blood and a mountain of skulls.

>>24492014
The replicator in Star Trek is essentially a vending machine.

downloading personality: Sleven from Lucky Number Sleven. watching it now in fact for the first time in like a decade. so goods

>>24492020
hey man, dont attack him, he is just the messenger.

Now if china fails to overcome america then its really over

I asked a girl on a date and she said she was busy that day. Never asking a girl out ever again.

>>24491397
close to mine but a little thicker and more dark brunette. also a little overbite and thin lips doesn't hurt.

>>24491803
I should also add that it wasn't really garden variety neocon, my bad. just imagine Christopher Hitchens but he dislikes all nonwhites instead of just muslims and thinks environmentalism, animal rights (though this excludes house pets), feminism (still agree with this) and welfare handouts are bunk.

>>24492005
you are the company you keep, I guess.

>>24492038
If it comes to it we will have to destroy America itself, and destroy it from within. If the death of America is what it takes to get history moving again then so be it.

Everybody wants to act like forces and events are these things like the weather, that sweep men and nations along. History is made by MEN. Events are caused by MEN. HUMAN BEINGS shape the tides of history, and if we don't like where history is headed we can do what is within our power to change it. I feel like grabbing and shaking so many people around me about this. You are not helpless. None of us are. We can bend the arc of history as we wish, if we just realize it. We don't have to settle for the world of the Last Man. We don't. We can chart a different course. If need be, we can blow it all up, and burn it all down. We're not doomed to a fate beyond our grasp. No person is.

>>24492064
I'd rather not die just so a bunch of wignats can get perpetual erections and spray jizz everywhere.

I made a joke to this beautiful girl who was interested in me that women were the root of all evil (Eve) to see what she'd say, and she retorts that women are also the root of all good (I guess referencing Mary the mother of Jesus). I decided to go on a date with another girl instead.

>>24492064
>burn it all down

that is not an alternative to liberal democracy

>>24492071
ANYTHING is preferable to Liberalism at this point, even the Abyss.

>>24492088
nihilism is not an alternative to anything, its the belief in nothing.

>>24492089
Another world can be rebuilt on the ruins of the old one. But the old world is going to have to be dealt with, first.

there’s something gently devastating about the effect scott pilgrim vs the world (the film) had on young millennial hearts.

last weekend I ran into a girl I went to secondary school with - both back visiting home like ghosts - and somehow ended up back at hers. by the time I’d found myself back in her flat, I already knew nothing was going to happen. we were suddenly talking about scott pilgrim. not in a 'remember that movie?' way. more like two people confessing to having grown up under it's ghostly instruction. the pastel dyed hair. the awkward niceness. the slightly sad boy at the centre of it all.

i hadn't thought about that film in years. hadn't needed to. because it never left. it quietly rewired the circuitry of every awkward, curious, mildly depressed young person. i've been on dates, stood in smoking areas, where scott pilgrim crept into the conversation like a third person in the room. we're still playing out some haunted half-version of that film. we didn’t even have to name it. it had named us.

>>24490118
This is the most myopic thing I've read all week.

>>24492092
and what world will you build?
fascism died in 1945 and communism died in 1991

>>24488235
Its more about the faith than using it as a social club which many people seem to think it is nowadays

Anyways I need to post this poll again so I can get help on making a choice here https://strawpoll.com/GeZARa0kRyV

>>24492104
I will build a world in which people can get to Heaven.

>>24492113
so just some gay vague utopianism?

>>24492100
I thought it was kind of gay. Aside from Freaks & Geeks I thought Apatow was a hack. I also could barely relate as I was the weird kid in school and those women avoided me then and avoid me now. Nothing's really changed. Most of them got married anyways and I never did.

>>24492101
You have consider they probably aren't doing much to change it. That's why I hate retards like Mark Fisher who think you can just build a network of friends to drop acid and dream about communism. Its pathetic.

My mom wants me to get an abortion. Worry about killing your own kids.

>>24492125
wait are you under the impression judd apatow directed scott pilgrim?

>>24492100
That's the power of art.

>>24492026
Point proven

>>24492064
>erm we must make everything super shitty to satsify my vague desire for History™ to happen
And you people wonder why liberalism always wins out over your movements.

>>24490579
Do some coke now and eat some shrooms then. Now you're really cooking with gas.

>>24492128
Same/similar vibe and period.

I don't think I'm ever going to reach a height in literature so great as Beatrice reprimanding Dante for his sins while he stands across the stream in complete anguish, weeping, and Virgil is nowhere to be found.

>>24488212 (OP)
Thanks, Instagram, for preparing me for all the bullshit I will have to put up with, the day I have a gf.

>>24492508
Hey, you can always reach the literatury height of fucking twinkboys in the ass high on coke.

So I worked almost 4 years at that place. A month ago my psychiatrist took me off sick for one month, and today after our appointment for another month. I feel that my life kind of came to its conclusion too early. I wasn't happy for the last 13 years, depressed and dissociated whatever. But at least I somehow functioned, God knows how I did it. But now? I feel like there's no coming back from this. I will be losing my job, my home, my self worth. That doesn't even bother me too much, it's more the case that I in some way always thought that it would be normal to be pessimistic and to think that life sucks and despite that just go through the motions and do what you got to do. Just get over it and do what's necessary. This idea is now shattered. I can just lay here all day and do nothing and extend this to the rest of my life, I'm 32 for fucks sake. Like, what does the psychiatrists even expect to happen? They prescribe you some pills and then everything will be fine? I can't even blame him, he's a nice person trying to help. Everyday it gets worse though, I am losing any motivation to even try to make any effort to get back in the working mode again and it just gets harder to simply imagine myself going back to work. This sick state pampered by the system is not what I learned growing up. My father never was sick, he did his work life every day going to work and never complain about it, just do the stuff. I'm a failure and don't know how to deal with this, will I be permaNEET for the rest of my life? It certainly feels that way. Maybe that's what I was meant to be.

>>24492540
What does this have to do with literature?

My heart won’t recover.

Mazzy Star and Elysian Fields are such great bands

>>24492571
What’s your diet like?

Does the extreme repetition ever bother you? Checking back in after over a year away, and it's the same shit. The same threads about the same books, the same misery.

There's definitely something wrong with me.
I feel like an odd angle.

Loneliness has a crippling effect on me but relationship would be even worse. Im designed to suffer.

>>24492714
life is repetitive

I'm ready for the next step, I'm bored of being human

>>24492759
k, bye

>>24492763
Come with me

>>24492679
Breakfast: Either nothing or some oat flakes with milk, a green tea or rarely coffee, rarely dark bread with cheese or ham on top.

Lunch: Some fruit, more tea, pistachios, maybe some more bread

Dinner: a warm meal, typically something with chicken meat, rice or potatoes, some vegetables like carrots and cucumber, or/ and frozen vegetables.

On weekends: Few beers and chips after dinner

Now this is already an improvement compared to my student days.

>>24491999
>>24492000
The duality of 4chan, apparently.

>>24492000
Why do people keep discussing fat fetishes in these threads?

mi shitty neet life has changed to shitty wagie life, working 12h per day as a forklift operator, coming back home to work out 2h in my garage, eating and sleeping. monday through friday, sometimes saturday. playing games on weekend. pay is fine, but fuck I want to kms

>>24492955
when do you have tine to read? sounds insane

I just want to fuck

>>24492973
Me?

>>24492955
i worked in a warehouse for a few months and i had 200% work rate pretty much everyday but got nothing but disciplinaries for taking shortcuts on the forklift, not signing paperwork that has my username already printed on it, putting two labels on one pallet

>>24492973
https://youtu.be/XHxE_jJcZmA?si=hW_w2TEle1JTbSx7&t=91

>>24492975
if you're hot

>>24492980
I'm sexually attractive if that's what you mean. Unfortunately I'm not interested in sex with you in particular because my interest is in forming a stable relationship with an individual and blossoming into a beautiful romance that lasts for the rest of our lives until death do us part.

all of my friends are spiders

My daughter got her menarche today. She can now procreate I believe. I'm ordering tampons on Amazon.

>>24493016
All my niggas are roaches (turks)

>>24493020
wtf I don't wanna hear that shit

>>24492990
female?

>>24493068
biologically?

>>24493020
Assuming this is real and you are actually a father, why the FUCK would you post about this on a board full of incel perverts? Weird mfs are going to be asking you for her hand in marriage and shit. Also don’t get her tampons for her first period; it takes time to figure out how to use them, and most girls don’t start using them until later on. Get her pads and/or some pairs of Thinx.

>>24492963
im reading everyday like 10-20 pages on work days, and around 50 pages on week days
>>24492976
I'll be working there for a year max, save lots of money, and then im taking a break to catch up with books. Life would be much easier for me once I'd save enough to buy myself a home, but that feels like a distant dream

>>24493077
>why the FUCK would you post about this on a board full of incel perverts?
I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm not showing her what people say on here.
>Get her pads and/or some pairs of Thinx.
I looked it up and looks like you're right. Thank you. I'll order pads and those underwear.

>>24491957
As in Hulk?

>>24493124
Yes. I acted like Hulk Hogan around the girls in college.

>>24492660
*Lazarus Blackstar and Elysian Blaze

>>24493126
HH Brother

A modern golden horde, a omadic pmc that wreaks havoc worldwide just for the sake of chaos

The right is wrong, we don't need Hitler's or Mussolini's. We need Attilas and Genghis khan's

>>24493162
>>24493171
This. We need virile barbarians, ideally of white extraction, to invade the modern West, teach the modern degenerates with a muscular fist, finally turn everything to dust and prolong the life of civilization.

I get wet very easily. There must be a medical term for it.

>>24493195
There is, it's called be my gf.

>>24493203
I'm a dude. Maybe I used the wrong term. I don't know what it is for men.

>>24493210
precum you mean?

I want to eat you.

>>24493020
I would like to ask her hand in marriage

>>24493214
Yes. I generate a lot of it.

>>24493210
Lmfao, how does a guy get wet?

>>24493220
Stop watching degenerate porn 12 hours a day.

>>24493210
fucking hell lmao

>>24493221
My underwear gets soaked. It's definitely generating more than usual.
>>24493226
Even if I see like a pic of an attractive girl who is clothed. I don't get a boner, but it still generates a lot.

>>24493233
how do i achieve this level of raw libidinal energy?

>>24493220
Get your prostate checked, it might be enlarged for some reason.

>>24493220
https://www.healthline.com/health/mens-health/semen-leakage#causes

Got an espresso machine as a gift. Made one using one of the many pods it comes with, and goddamn is it strong! Shame it's such a low volume of liquid though. Am I supposed to add milk?

>>24491999
It could be true but it's literally the first thing she reamarked the moment she saw me. Oddly enough it was also the last thing she remarked before we parted ways.

>>24493258
it's not related to prostate disease, i have the same thing. anyway wikipedia says
>In rare cases, an individual may produce an excessive amount of pre-ejaculate fluid, which may be treatable by a 5-alpha-reductase inhibitor, such as finasteride.[1]
and the source is
>Chudnovsky, A.; Niederberger, C.S. (2007). "Copious Pre-Ejaculation: Small Glands—Major Headaches".
dr chudnovsky recommends finasteride lol

>>24493283
espresso is the hard liquor of coffee. mix it into a latte or cappuccino or something.

>>24493299
So it's literally a sign of too much dick growth testosterone?

>>24493301
Americano is the best shit

>>24493301
>mix it into a latte or cappuccino or something.
I'm not even sure waht this means. I usually just drink some instant. And yeah, damn, I'm feeling the caffeine really strong rn, hot damn

>>24493312
>I'm not even sure waht this means
if you can't handle it, mix it into a chaser.

>>24493304
it seems like it, or your cowper's glands are too sensitive to it or something

>>24488242
Just to report back, i was early to make conclusions and the 2nd friend responded to my message and im gonna meet with him soon. Really happy about it. Hes an extrovert and we got along fine in uni so im looking forward to it

well im going to be home alone for the first time since last summer when I ended up in the hospital. when I was young this used to be a treat I looked forward to, now it gives me intense anxiety to be alone

I have 1 ( one) rizla left for the night and its 22.15pm


>>24493413
You got this buddy

>>24491742
You got a nice ass?

>>24493470
I have crumbs of weed left and it's 21:17

The fuck's the deal with internet dorks wanting to get raped in the ass or fuck bussy. not even early 10s something awful was this bad. shit is so fucking gay.

>>24493470
... france?

Had some guy on /v/ ask me what was so bad about building and hooking up to the matrix for maximum pleasure. That same guy then accused me of being a "life-negationist" or something. Which is funny since he absolutely hates life and wants to live in a simulation that is devoid of pain, a fundamental part of life. Someone did not understand Nietzsche.

I have 0 ( zero) rizla left for the night and its 23.01pm

>>24493474
That ship has passed for me, fortunately
>>24493517
No but i was in France for 1 semester as a student so i guess part of it remained with me. No, i did not fuck any french chicks

>>24493581
I mean there's always gonna be people with unconventional, even wrong intuitions. Or lying to win an internet argument. Or delusional.

Is it unusual for a heat wave to completely destroy your libido? I don't even feel the desire to nut in this weather.

I just don't feel like reading today. Might watch a bunch of movies. Haven't done that in forever.

I thought Chinook was a slur for Asians, like a portmanteau of Chink + Gook

When I woke up, I discovered that I had become some sort of vermin. My legs, multiple of them, moved in unison, and I found my back had been replaced by a plated, curved texture. My hands had become long and thin.

I suppose I'll finish reading Serotonin even though it's gotten boring just over halfway through...

>>24493679
I'm armed and legged.

>>24493679
Could make a killing in the showbiz

>>24493471
idk not really

Stargazy pie is my favorite pie

I'm writing my marriage vows and I am struggling with regards to making my statements concise yet deeply loving. My words feel restlessly verbose when I realize brevity is needed for a captive audience. I have been reading poetry from Song of Songs, Psalms, and even the book of Esther, but I need recommendations. I would love to get the opinions for anons here.

>>24493747
Writing your own vows is cringe.

My terminally online, politics obsessed, virgin friend is secretly dating and I didn't even know about it until today.
It's actually so fucking over. At this point my only options are rape or prostitution.

The only moment of respite for me is bedtime. Isolated in my tiny dark room as I hear the rain out there, sitting in the comfy reading chair, not having to give an account of myself to anyone else, under the spell of an illusory instinct of safety, reduced to a minimal space and a minimal presence, everything in sight, and of course the promise of sleep, the great reliever. Putrid comfy. It's pleasant in theory, in practice too, but you know hoe bad things have to get so an adult man has to seriously concern himself with comfiness. The stink of death overwhelms me. This comfort is but a consolation price. I am The Raped.

>>24493939
I think you need a dog.

I don't understand guys who sleep around, all foids act the same. Pussy tightness is the only variable

>>24493784
why?

>>24493964
Some women are too tight to have sex with. I feel bad for them.

>>24493939
I know that feel bro. The sense of utter defeat required for me to curl up in bed like I'm a kid again is rarely encountered but totally crushing.

Tarot readers should be arrested. Hitler was right about them.

Imagine being such an NPC you let chatGPT break you. All your life you just keep your head down because your parents were cool, then you got a job emailing people spreadsheets and got disembodied, and then you asked chat about simulation theory once. Society is en route for a heavy dose of mysticism straight back to 1880s. Bohme, Bergson, and Ben-Yehuda coming right back at us except natural science flavored.

Same magical thinking, different hegemony. It's like when you can tell someone can't abstract from a framework when they lash out at you pointing out that black people are more violent than other races by saying "well I have a black friend who isn't like that!" because they don't have the first general idea about it.

Either that or it's FUD but chatbots on top of Israel doing genocide is surely fucking with them mentally.

Recently broke up with my girlfriend and now I'm living like a gutter peasant again. The immediate decline in material conditions is almost making me wish I hadn't done it but this seems better than being suicidal

Tell me I'm a good boy.

>>24494073
Learn how to take care of yourself man
>>24494081
Only if you ate your veggies

>>24488212 (OP)
I just wrote a short romance story for the first time in my life after only ever writing horror stories. And it felt so good to bring my passion to fruition.

I am a wretched soul. I am far more disgusting than people think I am.

>>24488212 (OP)
I barely write. I don't read anything other than 4chan posts. But I wish I did. I wish I could enjoy literature, I wish I could build a world in my head.
I love romanticism, poetic phrasings, ideas, stories, creative things in general. I find them extremely interesting. But I can't do any of them.
I struggle to put my thoughts into words. I have realized that my thoughts are more like intuitions, and many times I struggle to develop them any further than just that, a low resolution intuition.
Sometimes I browse this board, very rarely, because I think that, here, I may find people who are able to articulate their thoughts better than I am. It's a pleasure to read well-written things.
I wish I was creative, I wish I could explore ideas and fantasy on my own. I think about so many things and nothing at all at the same time.

I have been thinking about starting a journal of my own. I always cringed at the idea, but I believe it could be helpful or useful. A small journal, the only place where I can be completely honest, a place only for myself. Write about anything and everything that goes through my mind. And I thought about vowing that, on this journal, I wouldn't betray myself, for this would be it's true purpose, a place where I can let go of my fears and be whatever I am.
I tried it, but I became angry at my inability to think about what to write. It frustrated me and annoyed me. It made me uncomfortable. It felt pointless and hopeless. And I somehow forgot what it was that I wanted to write about in the first place.

>>24488212 (OP)
gonna run this through one last time

https://strawpoll.com/GeZARa0kRyV

>>24493784
my dad wrote his own. and yet, he's married unlike you.

>>24494197
>what narrative history should I read?

aww shit mamdani looking good in early results dems will cry but they did it themselves by running an old creep like cuomo instead of someone new

Tuck me in, father. I can hear them already.

yo man it's fucking HOT rn god damn what the fuck

>>24494208
More like man-dummy
More like cum-o

hello guys its been a while

>Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.
>https://archive.is/29O2P

lol did u guys see this article? dropping out of society is working, they're starting to feel it lmao i mean i still work a job just to stack paper for myself, but all the dudes just lampin on the couch keep up the good work

>>24494223
>But here’s what’s real: We never needed you to be perfect. We needed you to be with us. Not above. Not muted. Not masked. Just with.
No one wants me.

>>24494227
based

>>24494223
>Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back
No one ever wanted me around. Falling into a black hole of isolation seems to have only affected me as no one ever reached out or missed me. I don't know what kind of man the author of this article thinks is no longer present in society but I believe they're imagining someone far more interesting and attractive than the type of man who gives up on being around other people.
I often wish I could be a fish, a bird, or a tree instead of a human being. I'm like a puzzle piece thrown together with another puzzle. I don't fit right with anyone or anywhere. Quiet solitude away from others is the best option for everyone involved - no getting hurt, no hurting anyone else, no burdening people, my human urges safely buried in mindless escapism and hedonism. It's not enough to sustain a life but it's enough to keep me going for a few decades until I safely commit quiet suicide alone.

>>24494208
That guy is the future of America once all the boomers die out.

>>24494260
yeah but when socialism inevitably fails and nyc returns to 1978 form, people will get all reactionary about it

>>24494223
I’m going to keep rotting until a cute sensitive hard on the outside soft on the inside alt artsy naive inexperienced virgin girl comes to save me (only times I go outside are for nightwalks)

>>24494223
I never experienced teen love so society must be destroyed and billions must experience hitherto unknown suffering and misery

>>24494278
whenever i got nightwalks in this big beautiful park near me i always think how nice it would be to smoke some (legal) weed as i stroll but for some reason i never do i just listen to 60s rock playlists on apple music, it's like 100 degrees today should i go for a walk around midnight and blaze some of this highly dank infused bud i have or what

>>24494199
suit yourself

>>24494159
Just write about your day and any observations you have and go from there
I feel a lot of the same things you do but once I write a little bit it gets easier and I start ranting

>>24494280
you're not entitled to male companionship ok, why don't u improove yourself honey

>>24488235
There are to Presbyterian (PCA) churches in my city. One of them, on the west side, is super rich. Everyone there doesn't notice you. They all dress so nicely, but still seem stylish, not stuffy. The beautiful people. You can attend this church for months and not have a single person talk to you or even notice you. They all seem to kind of already have a crew of people to talk to. They all have vacation homes. The other church, on the east, is not poor, but not as overtly rich. Everyone talks to you, and invites you for a drink or a coffee. Everyone is nerdy, meaning you overhear conversations about obscure theologians in passing. It's amazing how consistent the experience is: literally everyone at each church fits the vibe of that church.

>>24493603
It makes me want to goon more since my dick gets bigger which then turns me on

>>24494282
I always go to this one bench by the water and wait for a girl dressed in all black to come up and ask for a lighter or smth

Dj'you check the fences. Moon's get bigger.

I love you :)

>>24494278
The last guy I was seeing basically ghosted me after finding out that I was a virgin

Wasted my teens and twenties, I want to do something with my life but deep down I know that it's too late. Why did I waste my life? What caused the inertia? I'll probably be dead in one or two years, I don't see the point.

>>24494321
ya that's def a yikes after a certain age for women like what you're waiting for prince charming? get real lady

I think my coworker’s toying with me he’s like 5’7 super skinny super cute and has a pretty big ass for a man and is always exaggeratedly bending down to pick stuff up, swinging his hips, or leaning over the counter to show it off and he’s always playing with his hair and making these doe eyes ugh I’m not attractive in any way though I think he’s just picked up on how touch starved and lonely I am and is trying to mess with me idek if he’s gay

>>24494321
Dodged a bullet, I hope you find a virgin man perfect for you

>>24494299
oh that sounds zased, my park at night is just full of arab dudes sitting on the benches talking in arabic to someone in egypt, and maybe like some black ppl off the path sitting under a tree blazing a preroll, it's still comfy af but u def won't be seeing any goths

>>24494321
Same but my tits are huge

yo where the FUCK are these flying ants coming from i need to seal my air conditioner better or sth

>>24494321
I assume he wasn’t a virgin? I am so I couldn’t imagine myself with someone who’s already had experience

>>24493712
Start exercising then, squats, cardio
Ask the fags on /fit/ for more advice

>>24494328
He sounds based, it’s the duty of twinks to lead men on and make them question their sexuality

>>24494324
Read this
https://slatestarcodex.com/2014/08/16/burdens/

since literature is hella gay what pride events are u going to this year?

https://www.nycpride.org/events

>>24494332
I don’t care about dating someone who’s a virgin to be honest—the vast majority of men my age aren’t, so it would seriously limit my dating pool. But at this point I’ve kind of sworn off of dating anyway…maybe I’ll join a convent.

>>24494340
No, he was pretty experienced and had actually been married before.

Where do you meet women these days? Is literally everyone on dating apps?

>>24494386
Yeah, basically.

>>24494386
Going on a dating app is basically humiliation. I WILL meet someone irl or I won’t meet anyone at all

>>24494386
there's girls everywhere. i go out of my apartment, there's girls in the elevator. they're in cafeterias, subways

>>24494396
I told myself this like 5 years ago and what do you know, I never met anyone.

>>24494405
did u like talk to any chicks tho

>>24494403
>>24494413
You’re the worst thing that’s ever happened to these threads. Go away.

>>24494421
going to whine about some guy who ghosted you give years ago some more huh? great addition to the thread

>>24494386
Don't you have a mom?

Hey, I like to post about my love life every so often here too but these threads about becoming a little too ">tfw no gf" again

>>24494424
Have you ever even read a book?

> be
> go to college
> immediately disappointed with it
> stop caring
> start thinking about what I want to do after
> everything is fake and gay
> get depressed
> get bad grades
> graduate late
> can’t get a decent job
> get hired by same college to do meaningless bureaucrat work
> figure I’ll bide my time for a few years, build some experience, then go do something else
> COVID happens and I transition to full time remote
> pay goes up
> my job is meaningless but comfortable now
> unhappy but don’t know what to do that would make me happy
> just stay
> turned 30 this year
> regretting not really doing anything with my life or even leaving my little college town
> know I can still do things but nothing really crazy
> “fuck I pissed away my life by being lazy and unambitious”
Probably a pretty common thought these days if not a normal one. Anyway, it really upset me. I’ve been ruminating on this about a week now.

>>24494386
Everywhere. Everybody is spiritually a woman nowadays

>>24494421
two different people
the first is just a seinfeld quote

>>24494431
ur obv some slop tourist who came from crystal cows or whatever lmao go squat in the grrm general ho

I ordered condoms on DoorDash and the Dasher is a woman :o
I'm only getting the condoms for my first aid kit.

>>24494440
>not even answering my question
I’m embarrassed on your behalf.

>>24494439
>the first is just a seinfeld quote
The narwhal bacons at midnight, my fellow redditor xD *holds up spork*

>>24494433
oh shit bro i haven't seen u in ages, i also got a college job during the great recession and just stayed lol doing that easy comfy but low pay college paper pushing, rn i'm on summer hours with those three day weekends, kinda makes switch to a real job not that appealing, but i think this year i'm finally gonna make a break for it in the fall (yeah right)

>>24494444
they can be good for goon sessions especially in the summer when ur all sweaty and ur not sure if the drips all over the floor are sweat or nut so u gotta mop to be sure

>>24494455
>>24494459
Are you on Adderall or some shit? Take a fucking break.

>>24494459
I'm not a gonner.

>>24494454
does that make sense in response to a seinfeld joke? hmm

>>24494462
He's this thread's obsessed schizo. These people never fucking leave because the pseudosocial interaction they get from being recognized as a regular poster is all they have. Expect him to shit up the place with his braindead tweet-like posts until a mod bans his ass (unlikely) or he drops dead.

>>24494467
Yes making a seinfeld reference is reddit

>>24494476
it's not my fault u ruined the board so much that there's like three posters left and we all know each other

>>24494455
> oh shit bro i haven't seen u in ages
Huh? Do I know you?
> i also got a college job during the great recession and just stayed lol doing that easy comfy but low pay college paper pushing, rn i'm on summer hours with those three day weekends, kinda makes switch to a real job not that appealing, but i think this year i'm finally gonna make a break for it in the fall (yeah right)
Once you get used to the lifestyle it can be tough to leave. Shoulda became a professor or something. At least you’d have respect.

>>24494482
does the hold up spork meme really work as a putdown for someone being reddit

>>24494485
ya i finally got a masters and my coworkers are like now u can pick up some classes as an adjunct and get extra dough and i'm thinking ya and deal with a bunch of ai slop no way if i want more money i'll just get a real job

>>24494476
I don’t even mind when people are recognizable or post in the thread frequently, as long as their posts aren’t brainrotted slop like his.

>>24494492
bro the whole point of 4chan is dropping quick brainrots if i was gonna write some long ass shit i'd make a substack or some shit

>>24494476
I literally cannot recognize anyone at all, most posts look the same

>>24494496
How does it feel to exist as the lowest tier of human? How does it feel to be semi-retarded, and incapable of reading the room? How does it feel to be universally despised?

>>24494497
ya that chick is just a paranoid nutcase which is why she posts those weird wistful texts to some guy who ghosted her ass long ago and doesn't know 4chan exists

>>24494483
self-reflection time. it actually is annoying you're carrying on like this constantly on the literature board

>>24494505
a) That isn’t me. There are clearly multiple people here who despise you.
b) He definitely knows 4chan exists, and has browsed this board semi-regularly for like a decade, but go off I guess.

The Dasher was a strangely attractive woman wearing a bikini for some reason. She looked disappointed when she saw me.

>>24494521
uhhh

>>24494528
uhh what??

>>24494538
>that wasn't me
>he browsed this board semi-regularly

I talk like a little girl.

>>24494539
okay, and?

>>24494539
To clarify, what I meant is that the poster you were complaining about (>>24494476) is not me.

Please talk cleanly to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3sNC4G_Ag0

Does anyone know if the UberEats driver keeps the tip we gave them if we refunded the order? They grabbed the wrong food from the place (very similar name) but I still want them to keep the tip.

>>24494260
To elaborate, it’s not as shocking as people think that a Shia Muslim socialist immigrant from Uganda is likely to become the mayor of NYC, because the right-wing foolishly got complacent after reforming the GOP and electing Trump. They convinced themselves that “wokeness” was just a strange ideological phenomenon being pushed by the Democrats over the years and can be discarded with different people in charge. In reality “Wokeness” is just a more progressive form of liberalism that closer considers the changing demographics of the world, the fluidity of identity, the globalized consumer landscape, etc. Those things are all inherent aspects of the modern world in the 21st century. You can’t get rid of them. It’s the product of what our ancestors fought and died for in the World Wars whether you accept it or not.

Despite all the hatred the Democrats got for being too leftist according to conservatives the average young person believes the polar opposite. In reality the Democrats are far more standard liberals and when boomers die that brand of liberalism will die out too. The increasingly non-white, immigrant, gender fluid, consumer cattle young generations of the world will continue to adhere to this progressive liberalism. That fucking retard Elon Musk seriously posts all day on Twitter about how he “defeated wokeness” and now the most important city on earth is about to elect a young 33 year old socialist who supports every woke viewpoint in the book. And this is only the beginning. Once boomers near extinction the right-wing is only going to become more reactionary and paranoid realizing they can’t stop what’s coming once people born and raised in the 21st century become the main demographic to inherit the world. Global politics will be totally transformed around 2040 when this happens. It won’t be pretty. Trump is only the start of a major battle to come.

My interests in history include the American Civil War, World War II, and the Roman Empire.

New
>>24494682

>>24494563
What do you mean?

>>24494278
are you me?