>>24538644 (OP)
I love being insane BWHAHAHAHA

>>24538644 (OP)
how can people deal with life without drinking

It’s all fun and games until you get pancreatitis.

>>24538684
Then it‘s a party

if you travel around a lot the constant newness and movement can be a sort of reprieve. for a while i would drink fireball while i walked around at night, until i broke an ankle hoping a wooden fence, now i just walk around at night, talk to the crackheads who are the only people who will talk to you on the street these days

>>24538644 (OP)
You have to stop drinking to not be depressed idiot. Start running

I used to drink a lot, about a 12 pack a day for a decade. I quit a few months ago because I was getting gut pain but I miss it a lot. I feel like a nervous wreck really. The feel I’d get from beer was better than hard drugs.

retard juice loop

Im on lexapro and I've hard its a bit more dangerous to consume alcohol because I believe it is stronger? I want to be able to get drunk but I have so much health anxiety

>>24538658
smoke weed everyday

Captcha: T0YDJ

Hey !

>>24538658
20 y/os will read this and walk away with the exoteric, like Bolaño

>>24538658
Goddamn I really liked Post Office and Ham On Rye but his poetry is such incorrigible dogshit.

>>24538644 (OP)
I simply don't like the taste of alcohol. Plus as a writer it's an occupational hazard. I am on an antidepressant/antianxiety but it cuts off a lot of my emotional range, high and low. I'm a golem.
t. depressed autist and failed author

>>24538644 (OP)
Focus. There are no easy answers, only hard and obvious truths. The unfocused can only see the nothingness.

>>24539299
>why can't I express myself while taking pills that suppress expression?
I hate that we've ended up here, don't you?

>>24538644 (OP)
Just drink a little red wine so that you get a mild buzz and remember that life is worth living.

Clinical depression can only be fixed with drugs. Not that the drugs themselves cure depression, they just kick-start the brain’s reward centers to allow the victim to take the actions needed to correct the problem. The awful thing about clinical depression is that once it’s destroyed your brain’s chemical balance it takes away your will to actually do anything about it; that’s why drugs anre absolutely required.

>young niggas be like
>wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
>old niggas be like
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToQ0n3itoII

>>24539324
This is bullshit that we have been led to believe. I have MPD and there a multiple methods of mitigation that are never mentioned because psychopharmaceuticals are a great racket.

>>24539334
*MDD

>>24538644 (OP)
Doesn't make a difference unless you're plastered the whole day, every day, so why bother.

>>24539324
The drugs just mask the problem. They also make you impotent and suck out your soul.

>>24539316
What do you mean? I'm actually fairly happy with my writing, but nobody gives a shit about my Dostoevskyan-McCarthyan fantasy epic. Mainly the drug helps me not sperg out over minor things, but I can't say whether it's worth it.

i never saw the attraction of drinking

>>24538781
Based wisdom pearl.

>>24539331
The paradoxical nature of warning against undeserved states of bliss. But for the few it rings the siren.

>>24539400
>but nobody gives a shit about my Dostoevskyan-McCarthyan fantasy epic.
I do
>but I can't say whether it's worth it.
It isn't.
Trust me. I know how much it sucks and can suck. But the price of "mental stability" is rapture, boredom, acuity, passion. It just isn't worth it. At least when I wanted to kill myself I could still imagine a better world quite vividly instead of a vague blueprint.

>>24538781
do they constantly ask you for money like the ones around here

>>24539299
Anxiety is an element of life. Consider aborting your "medicine". Rather use a stimulant. It's all about getting your energy back. Whatever drug can reduce apathy without mortal side effect is a miracle.

>>24539413
>I do
His smile and optimism: restored
>It isn't
Fucking based. My library shelver job is cutting my hours down to almost nothing due to budget cuts + some HR complaints about shit I've said, probably how I mock clickbaity book titles. I think I'll wean off my meds when I resign.

>>24539420
I appreciate the advice albeit for context my anxiety had gotten so bad I couldn't sleep and I thought I was going to have a heart attack every night.

>>24539439
Based man WAGMI. Take it easy on yourself okay? Recovery is rough but you will feel like yourself thrice over once this has completed. Perfect time to throw yourself into writing like a maniac.

>>24539416
just give them the money cheapskate. if you can't pay some crackhead a few bucks to talk to you then you're somehow worse off than him

>>24539458
I once stayed up for almost three days straight having a panic attack and I had to drag myself across the floor. Nobody prepares you for stuff like that. I have terrible insomnia, nightmares and anxiety. But honestly I love my life. As soon as I decided that I started viewing it less as a life lived in fear and more as a life abundant in courage.
Ascend. Prove yourself wrong. I believe in you.

>>24539463
>Perfect time to throw yourself into writing
100%. I'm 200 pages into my third novel. I want it to be 1400 pages so I can mog Sanderson, and I think the court intrigue plot, the multiple crime novel plots, the monster insurgency plot, and the philosophical/theological wank that ties it all together will get me there.

>>24539498
>mog Sanderson
WHAT THE FUCK.

>>24539498
>mog Sanderson
shine bright you crazy fuck.
Really, go for it!

>>24539552
>>24539556
I'm on a mission from God, gents. Hopefully you'll be reading it someday before I start norwooding lmao

>>24539562
Any mission involving a comparison to Sanderson is the work of Beelzebub and destined for unfathomable catastrophe.

>>24539583
Relax, I'm only setting out to exceed his page count. The material is nothing like him. I dropped Mistborn two chapters in and Way of Kings has been in my stack for months bc my fantasy consumption has been limited to Clark Ashton Smith.

>>24539498
based

>>24538644 (OP)
Drinking easily causes depression. Depression doesn't exist in healthy people. Drink causes a lot of mental health problems and ever since I cut it down I've been feeling like a nornal person. Drinking for depression is a self-fulfiling prophecy.

>>24538892
Omw to your mom right now

>>24539479
I've been having a lot of them lately

I don't drink or use drugs. Why do you think it is normal to need intoxicants to cope with reality? Have you read the Koran?

>>24540288
Muslims don't need to kill themselves, their neighbors do it for them

I'm an unemployed schizophrenic and drinking is one of the few joys in my life currently. I say I've got a drinking problem because I feel like I do a disservice to people with serious issues by calling myself an alcoholic. I get fucking wrecked between two and three times a week atm. I drink till I can hardly stand and then I lie on the davenport listening to Bill Evans piano solos

>>24540636
giwtwm

>>24539334
Bullshit. Drugs are a standard treatment regimen because THEY WORK not because there is a conspiracy to make money. Depression is a neurological disorder in which the brain’s reward centers get messed up; you CAN’T take the necessary corrective actions while in this state. Drugs jumpstart the brain’s broken down reward centers which in turn gives the patient the motivation needed to take the necessary actions to correct the neurological disorder. Telling someone with clinical depression to “just do it” is laughably ineffective, they need a chemical crutch first.

>>24539388
As I clearly stated, the purpose of the drugs is to allow the patient to take the actions required to solve the depression long-term. Only people with severally damaged brain chemistry, which can’t be revitalized fully through therapy, need the drugs as a crutch to live their lives. Most depression victims aren’t THAT damaged however and get quit the drugs after therapy has restored their brain chemistry.

>>24538644 (OP) Drinking don't solve depression. Is that simple.

depends on your genetic makeup I guess. For me it's pretty easy, alcohol makes me happy for half and hour then I crash and I feel like shit.

>>24538644 (OP)
Go in the sun and be funny around early-20s women.
https://youtu.be/f5zJRF4qJ7E

>dude alcohol lmao

>>24538644 (OP)
Depression didn't make me alcoholic, chronic pain did though