What's your verdict /lit/, is this the next Jane Austen or what

>>24553836 (OP)
It's shit. Let me guess, this is from a book that sold a million copies?

>>24553836 (OP)
Yeah I'm good.

>>24553836 (OP)
Thats a long sentence to pinpoint that the boy was in the wrong in here and the girl is the good one

>>24553836 (OP)
Trite.
Its "style" feels over-done before I've even finished reading the first sentence.
Give me an hour of tweaking, and I could probably get chat GPT to shit out this entire excerpt word for word

>>24553836 (OP)
There aren't enough pop culture references. I could be reading a story about Tuscan peasants for all I know.

>>24553836 (OP)
I bet the frumpy feminist who wrote this felt real proud of herself. I hate these two characters almost as much as I hate the author who wrote this.

>>24553856
It's from some writing group subreddit. I lurk around in them sometimes to feel better about my own writing. Here's part 2 of their sample:

>>24553836 (OP)
This is a blatant ripoff of our queen's love story in style and content

>>24554036
>I lurk around in them sometimes to feel better about my own writing.
when ever i read dog shit writing i always get worried its going to stick to me and get dragged into my own stuff. i try to avoid it as much as possible

>>24553874
Yeah. This whole thing was actually fucking fascinating to me. From the first 3 sentences you can tell that the guy is being blamed for literally everything wrong with this setting and the girl (the author's self insert) lacks any sort of accountability for continuing to pursue/getting involved with some lackwit fuckboy who shows up 15 minutes late to a date and cites mercury being in retrograde. It feels like a looking glass through the perspective of a narcissistic female who does no self reflection and thinks all of her past partners are completely at fault for all relationship issues. A clear tiktok denizen who uses therapy speak and buzzwords to justify any and all of her actions. I can see her through these pages.

>>24554040
Yeah I thought of this retard as soon as I started reading this. It's the same bad style but it doesn't even understand what makes it what it is, and it dials it down to 2.

>>24554079
Trying to imitate Honor Levy is like trying to imitate Shakespeare

>>24554036
>>24553836 (OP)
Pretty good desu. I mean, it’s not literature and the sensibility is repulsive, not mainly because of a lack of intelligence but because she is bitter, but it’s a very clear expression of something tangible—especially as you see here the embarrassed ambivalence many women feel towards the men they are involved with.
More anons will read this with more interest than most of the writing samples anons post here. She’s a better writer than all of you

>>24554040
>>24554079
>>24554095
Rip off is better. Levy is a too clever Jew

>>24554036
Why is only "book in the last" underlined?

>>24554102
I'll admit that from a technical standpoint, the prose isn't terrible. However, 'expressing something tangible' isn't a good criteria for good writing. Anyone who's less than half retarded can and has done that in middle school. This isn't some complex, novel idea or feeling that she's made tangible — it's bitterness and mental masturbation manifest in words on a page, and she probably thinks she's Dostoevsky, exploring and dissecting the human condition in her time. I didn't fixate on it because it was good, I fixated on it because it encapsulates the female side of modernity, modernity being blatant narcissism and self-obsession. I loved seeing it through the lens of a woman.

>>24554139
Whatever software she was using was trying to point out a grammatical error. Now I'm trying to figure out what it was. Should it be "any books in the last year" instead?

>>24554165
>However, 'expressing something tangible' isn't a good criteria for good writing. Anyone who's less than half retarded can and has done that in middle school.
That is how I would describe good writing, which is possible for anyone to do. Art on the other hand, which I think is what you mean, is quite different, since it is about objectivity—true intellect. But this is impossible for the vast majority of people, including almost all aspiring artists, so I wouldn’t expect some woman from reddit (which alone is an ick) to achieve that. And if she tried the result would be worse than what you see here, which even you admit had some value, if accidentally

>through the lens
lmao

i can relate to this becuase i spend so much time online lurking threads about frued, astrology, god and google.
i cant wait till my life gets turned into a netflix series.

>>24554184
That is a fair distinction and I cede the point to you

>>24553836 (OP)
If this is all there was to read it would be better to not be literate at all.

>>24553836 (OP)
I hate this internet meme style speech. They seem to think this is the be all and end all for the human experience now yet nobody in real life or even online actually thinks or talks like this. Such a hackneyed crutch that will be completely panned in a few years.

>>24554210
>yet nobody in real life or even online actually thinks or talks like this. Such a hackneyed crutch that will be completely panned in a few years.
That's also my opinion on Joyce.

So many cliches phrases. Does the writer have no original thoughts or experiences? Why on earth would referencing Avril, already a hasbeen, be a good opening? I can picture the writer sitting and re-reading it over and over, jilling themselves off thinking those italics and em dashes make it look amazing. Embarrassing.

>>24554188
From the cover it looks to be about Sarah Baartman which is a very interesting story.

>>24554036
>that he mistook for chemistry
>and yet sparks flew
So was he mistaken?

>>24554210
I hate this shit too, but "people don't actually talk this way" is shitty reasoning. Art is not supposed to be a perfect reflection of reality. That's what journalism is supposed to be. Art is stylized. Art is heightened reality.

>>24554464
Chemistry =! Electricity
And it's called linear progression. In a sense her pretending to laugh, and his mistaken interpretation of that, leads to the the development of what would never have occurred. Remember, this is not true love, it's modern love.
Literature is wasted of idiots

>>24553836 (OP)
books that heavily depend on being from a particular time are always bad. Jane Austen is exactly not that.

>>24554470
Yeah I've never heard anyone talk in heroic couplets, or Elizabethan free verse

>>24554210
I feel a problem with modern literature in general is that it’s all done through the lens of post-ironic modern capitalism. More specifically, through either an incel or femcel lens. The result is often mean-spirited and without heart since it just comes off as the author bitching about how much their life sucks. This whole idea of “stories” that are just thinly veiled blogposts needs to go.

why do trashy threads like these get more traction than serious discussions about literature?

>>24554521
There's nothing wrong with this if you think of it. Internet is for gossip and real literature approaches the status of scripture... You can't "talk" about scripture. So, it's fine

>>24554521
No prerequisites

>>24554211
>>24554470
>They seem to think this is the be all and end all for the human experience now

They aren't addressing anything about the human condition through complex literary methods like Joyce. They just dial internet lingo and references to 10x because as I said they think this is the human experience now. That's it. They aren't saying anything new or creative they are literally just doing this because they think this is the future of humanity. Go watch an interview with that Levy and fuccboi retard they clearly have nothing to say and are just aping this shit because they think it's the new big thing. And that's the worst part it isn't even how we humans experience life now, even terminally online autists only peppered their posts with internet lingo using mostly normal speak. It's just an extremely brain-dead form of showmanship.

>>24553836 (OP)
>>24554036
>dear reader
Cringe.
This is a shitty Honor Levy rip off and I'm not even an Honor Levy simp.

>>24553856
Fpbp

>>24554036
i need to stop going on 4chan. i feel bitter and repulsed and frustrated and suicidal

>>24554095
More like trying to imitate the splatter patterns of an old dried shit.
Levy is a non-entity compared to Shakespeare, and her writing is kindergarten level structured crap (He....She....) Reading Levy is inviting Jewish rectal demons into your head. By the time you finish her book you'll be raping toddler in tunnels underneath New York. Too bad her family wasn't baked, if you catch my drift.

>>24553836 (OP)
>Avril Lavigne

Made me laugh and cringe

>>24555734
We should be more respectful of our queen regardless of her origins

>>24553836 (OP)
>online culture references
>dysfunctional protagonists
>heavy non-stop irony
Just another jaded zoomer writing about her own dull life. File under "zoomslop."

>>24554170
No, the phrasing is fine. She's probably using google docs; it's grammar checker has become obnoxiously useless ever since (surprise surprise) they started using AI to try and """improve""" it.
And for some fucking reason they won't let you turn it off on mobile.