Thread 24709432

I've always wanted to be a creative ever since I was young. I've day dreamed about being one and tried working my ass off trying to write ever since I was around 12. My parents tried pushing me towards it for school assignments. I also wanted to draw but never got into it seriously.

I've been wanting to write again for nearly 2 years now and have barely made any progress towards that goal. I've only done one little drabble like 2 years ago and haven't done any exercises since then. I've been trying to get myself to write, but all of it looks too complicated and exhausting for me. I've tried multiple different strategies, but they never seem to work. I've tried forcing myself to write, but can only make myself write a couple of sentences for barely 30 seconds before stopping and looking at my phone again.

I've never been able to complete a single multichapter story in my entire life and actually coming up with stories isn't much better. I can't think anything through and everything about trying to make an entire story looks too hard for me. I want to be a creative really badly, but nothing I've done seems to have amounted to much of anything. I want to become one so badly, and I want to stop wasting my life doing nothing.

>>24709432 (OP)
Shit you not, it's a muscle. You start out benching the bar, it smacks you in the face. Some people around you laugh, others give you the side eye, you know you'd do the exact same performative shaming ritual if you were them, but to you, it's devastating. So you look at the masters who should motivate you, those great few who spun beauty straight out of their heads. And you see them and where they are, and you and where you are, and the way people cringe when they see your work, and you decide it's hopeless. You're not creative. Let the journal collect dust above your bookshelf. You've trained yourself to bounce between interests so nothing can ever matter enough to hurt. To be hard. Boring. Daunting. Maybe that's why so many "artists" feel like normal people wearing a costume and doing an impression of an artsy type; when those people make it part of their personality I'd imagine it forces them to care about their creativity.
I get it, it's hard to try when the stakes are this high. Socially, I mean. All the TikTok compilations of people being embarrassing, the gnawing in your cerebellum when you make that visceral reaction. It's like when you were a kid, watching a movie with your parents, and that scene came on. Killing, domestic violence, something bad happens on the screen, and you make sure to throw in a little shake of your head or a little sigh under your breath, just to make sure mom doesn't think you're into that kind of thing.
It's poison, arsenic for the mind. It'll try to tell you that you're not the right kind of person who achieves their dream. Some people got into it when they were too young to be self-consious, others pushed themselves through anyways. Passion paired with discipline can break through the monotonous cliff face that keeps anyone from becoming good enough for the pride in their work to take over and continue the cycle of improvement. It's likely the only way.
Yeah, you suck. You aren't creative. Neither are the creatives until they hit a certain point where they know what they're doing. But, unless you gave in to the crab-bucket shithell that engulfs everyone these days and turns them into performative, plastic people with algorithm-friendly haircuts, you're probably more creative than you were yesterday. If you keep doing that, maybe you'll still be shit, especially compared to the greats, but you'll be at least good enough to look back on your old work and feel an endearing sort of cringe. Like an old episode of a show you used to like, one that's no longer funny, but was the best thing ever to a certain person in a certain place at a certain time. You.
And there's always the chance that you're better off than a whole lot of others. To them, you're up above, squandering the latent talent they wish they had so you can watch TV like the average drone with a dead dream. Instead of growing into the kind of person they think of when they imagine "making it".
Just like a muscle.

Obligatory
KILL YOURSELF HOWIE

There is this misconception that creative people are dreamers. Most people are dreamers. What separates creative people from the rest is that they are "doers". They do the thing, whether its shit or not, and when they do it enough, obsessively, with a little luck or talent they get good at it. But you have to DO IT. Not think about it.

>>24709995
How do I make myself? My problem is my ADHD and my inability to make myself get started on things most of the time. I've been writing and RPing for years, so I have been able to do these things for a long time.

kill yourself

>>24710062
>for the past three years
really? I feel like I only started seeing them a few months ago, but I also don't use /lit/ a ton

howie bait thread
he's posted this shit a billion times

>>24709432 (OP)
cute dance

>>24709432 (OP)
Just be creative

>>24711960
How?

>>24709432 (OP)
It's a mixture of having maaaaaany hours of experience with your craft (massive bonus points if you were autistically interested as a kid and thats all you consoomed) and good genetics.

>>24712350
When I say "with your craft" I mean consuming said craft and also creating art is said craft.

>>24709432 (OP)
Fuck off, Howie.

>>24709955
At this point Howie is just a sounding board for all the delusional retards who still respond in good faith to his threads.

Even if this were a legit thread, this kind of response is just profoundly stupid and meandering. OP was asking about creativity, not offering to be your shrink. Keep your hangups to yourself. No one wants to know every inane observation that crawls through your small, slow mind.

>>24712524
You come across as bitter with a post like that. What's going on? What makes you feel the need to lash out?
And it's easy to tell it's just a rationalization of your own problems when you fill your post with that "bad vibes" stuff that you don't need to back up.
Relax. If OP isn't sincere, maybe some of the lurkers itt are. I'm sure doubt and worry are common emotions among people wishing to start any hobby.
It sounds like you have an issue with emotional control, anon. That, or just really poor reading comprehension. Either way, just know I'm rooting for you.
Just be kind and move on with your life.

>>24713089
You actually can't respond without drowning into a stream of consciousness. Hilarious. Ford the waters with a little economy of language before replying, okay?

>>24713251
Not everyone has to share your taste in writing style. Hell, I kinda like that wavy sort of prose, y'know, the kind that just reaches out and touches everything around it? I mean, people's minds are all about relating things in their heads, why not wind the sentence around here or there? Give it a try, it's fun.

>>24713311
That’s right, keep shortening your responses. I’m glad I was able to reach you something, you frantic little sperg.

>>24713311
That’s right, keep shortening your responses. I’m glad I was able to teach you something, you frantic little sperg.

>>24713314
And now you're back to the bitterness. I mean c'mon, it's an anonymous board, what gets you so wound up that you go and get upset like this? Lighten up man, we all clicked on this board for similar reasons. School year woes?

>>24713320
See now you’re stagnating. Not a new feeling for you, I imagine. Keep tightening that text. Once day you’ll know what it’s like to write normally.

>>24709432 (OP)
you have to buy a macbook pro and start spending a large part of your paycheck on starbucks

>>24713326
Whatever it is, I genuinely hope it gets better. If you're struggling, you should know that no matter what way you feel about yourself, there's always gonna to be a place for you amongst others, and your problems will in time either pass or become bearable as you learn to live well with them. No matter how many strings you believe have snapped, no matter how many links with others have been lost, there'll always be a connection somewhere. Always.
And as for my writing style? If the world at large can put up with Cormac McCarthy, then a slow literature board on a Cambodian midget sightings forum can put up with me.

>>24712350
I already do have many hours of it. I've been writing since I was about 12.

>>24713349
See you’re doing it again. I know relapsing is in your nature but I didn’t think it’d be this quick. Can you do anything consistent in your life without falling face-first? So embarrassing.

>>24709432 (OP)
What’s the point in wanting to be a writer when there’s nothing you want to write?
That’s the question you need to be asking yourself.
I write in one genre and only one genre, erotica. Because I am a coomer, always have been, my sexual imagination is my world. Everyday I see inspiration all around me and writing my gooner smut is easy. It takes no effort or force, the words about everyday ordinary women and big gigachad cocks just flow from my fingers as if I am possessed by some spirit.

>>24714251
I have plenty of stories I want to write. Why do you think I don't want to write anything?

>>24714251
Because I have ADHD, have constant distractions and have really bad executive function. That's my problem.

>>24714251
Why do you immediately assume that I have nothing to write or want to make when it's a problem with my ADHD, lack of focus and other such things?

>>24709432 (OP)
Waiting for a sequel.

>>24714332
You said it yourself, you want to be a writer, that’s not the same thing as having something you want to write. You have not written anything in two years, that’s 2 years in which there has been nothing you wanted to write.
> it's a problem with my ADHD, lack of focus and other such things?
That’s an excuse, there’s many writers with ADHD and it doesn’t stop them. It doesn’t stop you doing all the things you actually want to do everyday

>>24714251
I see creating art of any kind as a good thing, and I want to be the sort of person that creates.

But I have nothing to say and create nothing, which makes me hate myself.

>>24714684
Why worry about it?

>I wanna write but I will do nothing to write
LMFAO

>>24714652
>You said it yourself, you want to be a writer, that’s not the same thing as having something you want to write.
I have plenty of things I want to write. In fact, I just tried writing something recently, but kept giving up because of the reasons I gave here. This is projection of the way that your own brain works onto me because you fundamentally have no idea how ADHD works. It's a valid explanation because ADHD is a genuine brain disorder that shows up on scans. It doesn't react to stimulants the way normal brains handle them.
ADHD does require you to violate the idea of a hobby and turn it into a pseudo-job where you have to stick with it whether you're enjoying it or not. That's a critical component of ADHD management that most people do not understand, you must learn how to force yourself the right way that works for you.

You're also forgetting the executive dysfunction aspect of ADHD which becomes worse in adulthood. It's got nothing to do with how many potential distractions are available so much as it is avoiding upsetting situations. What looks like distraction is in fact avoidance. I can have 1,000 tabs open and focus on my writing. I can have 1 tab open and sit there feeling miserable and unaccomplished. It's too easy to feel barraged by intrusive thoughts and end up unable to accrue momentum. Without sufficient space to yourself it can feel simultaneously isolating and surrounded.

ADHD is a highly misunderstood disorder.

Now, with all that in mind, are you going to give me actual advice or not?

>>24714712
I just tried writing a small fanfiction recently and couldn't even manage to do it.

>>24714652
>>24714712
This isn't even counting how much RPing I've done in the time between then, which counts as writing. Stop projecting onto me and give me advice.

>>24714824
LMAOing @ this cope
My mom has ADHD and didn't even know she had it until she was already a professional writer. In hindsight, it should have been obvious, because she was kind of a shitty mom and never really meshed well with normal jobs, but it was never a problem with writing because it was just something she wanted to do, it’s fun for her, she wants to make up stories in her head and show them to people
>and sit there feeling miserable and unaccomplished
In other words, you’re not enjoying it and you’d rather do something else.
My advice to you, is simply to figure out what exactly it even is you want to write, if anything. “I want to be a writer” is non constructive, “I want to write XYZ” is better.
>>24714831
How come your ADHD doesn’t stop you from RPing?

>>24714879
>LMAOing @ this cope
None of this coping. This simply basic facts about ADHD and you're still struggling to keep up.
>Buhbubuhbubblblbbl my anecdotal evidence
I don't care.
>In other words, you’re not enjoying it and you’d rather do something else.
Yeah, this is what people have told me for literally every single hobby I've ever tried including non creative ones or just anything in general. I've given up on GameMaker, FireAlpaca, Photoshop, Source Filmaker, couldn't figure them out and gave up. Or simply stopped.
>My advice to you, is simply to figure out what exactly it even is you want to write, if anything. “I want to be a writer” is non constructive, “I want to write XYZ” is better.
I currently have about five story ideas running around in my head and I still can't figure out how to formulate them into a coherent narrative or figure out how to write them. Are you going to give me actual advice or not?
>How come your ADHD doesn't stop you from RPing
Because it's instantly gratifying, whereas writing normally isn't. Hell, I still have trouble even keeping up RPing most of the time.

>>24714913
That’s because creativity is not an attribute that you have, you do not enjoy creating things. It does not matter if it’s a game, a drawing, photoshop or writing, it’s just not as engaging as literally anything else. In theory someone could cultivate such an attribute, but that is indeed something you need to force and stick with, which you’ve already explained you can’t do. So, I’m sorry, but given the limitations you have described it is literally over. You’re going to have to find something else that you want to do.

>>24714940
Then was I writing, role-playing, making up characters, writing fanfiction for 12 years because I "didn't enjoy creating anything"?

>>24709432 (OP)
Practical steps:

1. Build yourself a study table or standing desk where you can write at
2. Buy notebook
3. Train yourself to stay standing and write
4. Just write and write and write and write, get it all down on paper
5. Don't worry about editing or all that stuff at first, just let your thoughts flow onto the page via your pen
6. When you're library-dependant and they have pcs: open up a free blog somewhere, don't sit behind the computer, take an active body pose, ram all your frustrations onto the blog. Set it to private and enjoy the joy of making. The internet needs more try-harders, even if that means not showing and flaunting your work. Or just do it in a word processor and save to USB.

Education, school helps, to learn some of the script. It's mostly dumb practice. But if you can train yourself on video games, you can train yourself on creative pursuits.
6. If you use a computer, use standing desk also

source: I wrote >10 notebooks full and typed a 115.000 word monograph and 300.000 blog words the couple past 3 years while standing

>>24714971
Not strictly éverything while standing, to honestly add, but a great deal of it was uprightly typed / written.

>>24714971
Is it okay if I use my phone to type stuff on? I used to do that a lot.

>>24714959
>No response
As expected from bad faith retards that try to demoralize me out of any hobby.

>>24710055
>My problem is my ADHD
Your problem is using ADHD as an excuse. Your problem is using anything as an excuse. If you want to write, you'll find a way to write; if you don't, you won't. I have ADHD and I still find the time to crank out a little bit of personal, just-for-me writing every day. You want permission to write, but you're the only one who can give you that permission, so stop fucking waiting for external validation and get to fucking work.

>>24715280
I currently RP almost every day.

Bump

>>24715941
So RP since that's actually what you want to do.

>>24709432 (OP)
first question:
is english your first language?

>>24717003
Yes.

>>24716989
But I want to write stories.

>>24709432 (OP)
>I want to become one so badly, and I want to stop wasting my life doing nothing.
Have you tried the STIGMAP method for creativity?

>>24718650
I don't know what that is.

>>24718676
You don’t know what what is?

>>24718677
No. What is it?

>>24718688
What means what.

>>24718706
Stop trolling my threads or give me advice. I'm not going to respond if you don't tell me what this method is.

>>24718707
What method? There’s a lot of methods.

>>24718708
>Have you tried the STIGMAP method for creativity?

>>24718710
Well, have you?

I prefer the LIGMA method for creativity

>>24718713
Stop trolling my threads or give me advice. I'm not going to respond if you don't tell me what this method is.

>>24718716
It’s the STIGMAP method

>>24718719
>ZOMG SUCH LE EBIN TROLLIN HERES YOUR REDDIT GOLD!

>>24718723
So you’re not going to even try it?

Ugh. You again.
I'll tell you what I told you last time.
You don't have a problem being creative, you have a problem being human. You need to fix that first. I don't care what method you use—therapy, drugs, electric shock, psychosurgery, imprisonment, Dianetics—but deal with that first.