Thread 2055859

What would FAA regulations be like if witches (the kind that fly on brooms) were real?

>>2055859 (OP)
Ask Linda Blair

They are real and most of the time they do not fly because the spirits they rely on are also restrained

As long as they could limit it to 55 knots I’d say they’d just call it an ultralight.

Subpart A—General

§ 103.1 Applicability.

This part prescribes rules governing the operation of ultralight vehicles in the United States. For the purposes of this part, an ultralight vehicle is a vehicle that:

(a) Is used or intended to be used for manned operation in the air by a single occupant;

(b) Is used or intended to be used for recreation or sport purposes only;

(c) Does not have any U.S. or foreign airworthiness certificate; and

(d) If unpowered, weighs less than 155 pounds; or

(e) If powered:

(1) Weighs less than 254 pounds empty weight, excluding floats and safety devices which are intended for deployment in a potentially catastrophic situation;

(2) Has a fuel capacity not exceeding 5 U.S. gallons;

(3) Is not capable of more than 55 knots calibrated airspeed at full power in level flight; and

(4) Has a power-off stall speed which does not exceed 24 knots calibrated airspeed.

Kiki here would need a commercial rating in order to run her delivery business. I'd think broom flight is VFR only.

How is the broom controlled though? Weight shifting, or powered lift (if it can hover)

If you buy a certificated broom, only a licensed broom mechanic could maintain or repair it. If you build a broom from a kit, or from scratch, it will be classed as an experimental broom and cannot be used for commercial purposes.

>>2055899
Oh, and a witch would need to carry an ADS-B transponder so other aircraft can detect her.

>mfw an entire section of Title 14 CFR needs to be dedicated to keeping wizardniggers from:
>getting sucked into the air intake of a TWA Boeing 747 and turned into red mist
>flying into power lines
>getting shot down by MIM-14 Nike Hercules SAM batteries after they strayed into NATO military airspace and the radars mislabeled them as incoming Soviet MiG-21s

its thier culture

>>2055859 (OP)
>>2055883
I think their potentially accessibility (depending on how common the "magic" that allows them to fly is in the general population) would probably mean wider regulations need a rethink.
I think there would probably be a reasonable maximum altitude for brooms, and that would then be the minimum altitude for all powered flight (even VFR).
Similarly, I think there would be an exclusion zone around airports to allow aircraft to climb up to the minimum altitude unobstructed.
I think there would also be a lot of PSA's on TV and the internet reminding broom users of these rules. If it were me, I'd come up with a useful mnemonic like, "if a person on the ground is smaller than your width of your outstretched finger, you are TOO HIGH. If you can read the numbers on the runway, you are TOO CLOSE."

faa regs are consistent across categories;

1) can you read a sectional chart, retard? (y)/n
2) okay good. stay the fuck out of controlled airspace and don't fly into tall objects. now, are you retarded, retard? (y)/n
3) okay good. you're VFR-only. check the fucking weather reports, retard.

>>2055859 (OP)

Why is Kiki so fat?

If magic brooms are VFR only there's no flying after sunset, right?

>>2055948
part 1692 contains provisions for full-moon flights around coven airspace as long as there is a cauldron simmering

>>2055859 (OP)
Witches' magic flight would predate any kind of mechanical powered flight, and thus regulations regarding it. So, they would likely get grandfathered into the system, with some reasonable restrictions to prevent stupid witches from killing themselves (e.g. don't fly into controlled airspace if you don't want to add to the bird strike statistic), but otherwise largely freeform, like bicycles. Take off and land whereever as long as it's not trespassing, ride whatever broom you want, baisically just be reasonable and don't get in the way of bigger and more dangerous aircraft.
Aside from rules written in blood, free flight also comes with some privacy concerns, so that might also introduce some rules. There likely will be some restrictions on aerial photography to prevent spying witches, you'll have to get permission to carry a camera. Old dense city centres would have witch leylines at regulated height over the street, to prevent them from peeping into the windows and disturbing foot traffic (they can briefly deviate from the leyline to land or to rise over the buildings into unregluated airspace, but no flying into the windows, even if it's your window).

>>2055936
preggers looks like

>>2055987

P-Preggers?!

I imagine a combination of normal private pilot stuff (stay out of commercial lanes, stay the fuck away from real airports) and how pedestrians are treated (stay out of automotive roadways, stay the fuck away from highways entirely)

and thousands would be killed every year by not following those simple rules

>>2055859 (OP)
Like paramotors maybe. How fast are we talking about here?

>>2056128
What will they use to test engines against witch strikes? Whole frozen lambs?

>>2055973
>everyone behind Kiki can see her underwear

>>2055859 (OP)
The witches would rule us all, they wouldn't be subject to any regulation.

>>2056171
witches will remain within visual contact of two or more other witches at all times during flight.

>>2055859 (OP)
Either a bunch of regulations that make it impractical to fly anywhere without being extremely costly or slow, or common enough that there are whole subreddits seething about "broombrains".

>>2055859 (OP)

Presumably airspace restrictions comparable to that of drones today.

>>2056171
yeah but then the witches would institute traffic rules for themselves, much as humanity is the dominant species of the sea and yet there is an entire organization dedicated solely to establishing laws over international waters

>>2056142

Just have an actual witch fly into them and then use some spell to reconstitute her good as new

>>2055859 (OP)
My guess to be honest, treated them the same as "Drones" and "Motorcycles."

>>2055973

l-lewd

>>2055973
> bird strike statistic
>tfw have to fill out ANOTHER witchstrike report
Goddamn it, when will these bitches learn?

>>2056404
>witches need licenses to fly

>>2055859 (OP)

Kiki no!

Probably the same as drone laws in plane air spaces or prop plane/personal aircrafts laws. Where you need to get approved ahead of time, so probably some sort of chip in the broom.

>>2055903
Im pretty sure the RCS of someone riding a broom is smaller than that of a jet fighter, anon

>>2057268
I read a study from 2004 about how to spot kayakers with radar. Their results showed a corner reflector is best (for the broom) but witches could line their capes or hats with foil to increase RCS.

>>2057309
>broom must be equipped with radar retro-reflectors
>as well as strobe for nighttime flights
>of course nobody does that

>>2055987
>>2056111

Are there any regulations against pregnant women flying?

Witches turn FAA-glowies into frogs after every attempt at enforcement action. A 9/11 tier contingency plan is kept in reserve by the witches, just in case, implemented with a squadron of giant street sweepers which, unexpectedly, are also effected by flying broom magic.