hello r9k how are you doing today? did you achieve anything or just chill? i cleaned my room! a small victory but it made me happy!

I'm tired of small victories, I need real progress

>>81504645 (OP)
I have eleven days before I move out of my apartment, so I made a list of everything I need to do before then

>>81504650
any victory is progress in my book! but i understand, what would real progress look like to you? are you working toward it?
>>81504660
sounds exciting! are you moving to a better place?

>>81504645 (OP)
hi nice anon!! i'm doing fine, i did house chores all day, now i'm going to rest and play some minecraft. how are you doing??

>>81504679
I'm moving to a very different place. I got a job in China (I'm American). There's a lot to do before I move out, and very little time to do it, so I am stressed.

>>81504830
is that you, bird anon?

>>81504830
Fortunately I'm moving out in eleven days but then I'm gonna spend six weeks with my parents before I properly fly out to China. So I do have some time. But I need to do interviews with the school, get my paperwork done, get a visa, get a place to live, get my plane tickets... and that's just the China stuff!

>>81504840
haha yes it is nice to be recognized
I'm gonna try to go birding in my city for the last time next week.

>>81504815
hello anon!! sounds like a productive day! mc is a good way to relax, do you prefer vanilla or modded?
>>81504830
>>81504841
awww that does sound stressful:( i hope you enjoy life in china tho!!! i have family there and they seen happy!!

>>81504847
>haha yes it is nice to be recognized
i'm the anon that encouraged you to start birdposting again. i've been really, really depressed, but it's nice to see you're doing it in the end! i wish you the best of lucks!!
>>81504857
>hello anon!! sounds like a productive day! mc is a good way to relax, do you prefer vanilla or modded?
i play any mode! it's always fun to play with friends, but right now my friends are playing some other stuff like marvel rivals. do you play it?

>>81504881
>i'm the anon that encouraged you to start birdposting again
I quit after I made an OP that got no replies, but I can try again tonight...
>depressed
Any particular reason why?

>>81504645 (OP)
I didn't do much this weekend but I did remember to shower, shave, and cut my fingernails.

>>81504915
>but I can try again tonight...
i think you should stay away from birdposting for a while, to see if you actually get more (You)s
>why?
breakup. a bad breakup

>>81504881
>i play any mode! it's always fun to play with friends, but right now my friends are playing some other stuff like marvel rivals.
true, it is much better with friends! i cannot really play singleplayer anymore cus i get so lonely so i play on servers or rarely set one up for friends who r in the mood for it!
>>81504915
i like ur birds!

>>81504916
youre taking care of yourself! that is smth to be proud of!!

>>81504645 (OP)
I got up early ish and went to church.
I went to the mall just to look around.
But I didn't really do anything productive for the rest of the day. I got home and napped for a few hours. And I didn't really get stuff done since.

>>81504948
I am trying. Thanks fren. It feels good to recognise this and be proud of myself for keeping on keeping on. Even if it is small. I beat myself up for being lazy a lot but I have autism and social anxiety so life can be challenging because of that.

>>81504932
>stay away from birdposting for a while
oops, too late
>breakup
God I can't imagine much worse than that

>>81504972
aww:( i understand, do try your best to be forgiving with yourself!! and keep track of these little wins!! every little win matters!!

>>81504935
>i cannot really play singleplayer anymore cus i get so lonely
yeah, the depression hits really hard while playing that game alone... i used to play it alone when i was 17 - 18 while all of my classmates were out having fun. quite the sad days that i'm thankful of having left behind
are you currently playing it?
>>81504989
it's ok! i hope you get many (You)s!
and, about the breakup, it's like when you get rid of some toxic waste that has been in your house for years. it's toxic, it's true, but you grow fond of it for some reason. but you know you'll have to throw it away, it's like that sandwich homer simpson didn't want to throw away

>>81505043
No (You)s so far... what a pain...

>>81505043
>yeah, the depression hits really hard while playing that game alone... i used to play it alone when i was 17 - 18 while all of my classmates were out having fun
i vaguely recall days like that myself during school, but my memory is not good these days. so i think i can relate to this feeling!
>are you currently playing it?
yes, working on designs for a jungle home on my amplified world

>>81505100
>i vaguely recall days like that myself during school, but my memory is not good these days. so i think i can relate to this feeling!
woah, anon are you like 40 years old!! it's not been long :D but yeah... it would have been nice if we had better school days, i guess
>yes, working on designs for a jungle home on my amplified world
ok stop that we're going to explore the world

>>81505065
i'll give you a (You) here! and a hug

>>81505153
>woah, anon are you like 40 years old!! it's not been long :D but yeah
nono, im in my early 20s! i dont remember much of my life before a few years ago tho. its all a shattered blur!
>it would have been nice if we had better school days, i guess
ya:(
>ok stop that we're going to explore the world
nice world!!

>>81505182
>nono, im in my early 20s!
i know, silly. i'm just making fun of you!!
>nice world!!
i'm gonna bring you around in my boat so you can save me from falling into lava pits

>>81505196
>i know, silly. i'm just making fun of you!!
i apologize i am uhhhh
i had drinks!!
>i'm gonna bring you around in my boat so you can save me from falling into lava pits
lava detector job waow

>>81505217
>i apologize i am uhhhh
>i had drinks!!
apologies accepted! wait..... what??? (gasps) you had drinks and you didn't. invite. me....
>lava detector job waow
yes i'm offering a pay of 1 diamond per hour

>>81505251
>what??? (gasps) you had drinks and you didn't. invite. me....
here you can have this glass!!
>yes i'm offering a pay of 1 diamond per hour
in this economy??? quite generous!!

>>81505265
>here you can have this glass!!
nice anon... i think... your eyes are gone!! what happened? D:
>in this economy??? quite generous!!
i don't see too much interest so i guess the spot will be available for a long time ;-;

>>81505304
>your eyes are gone!! what happened? D:
stolen by the glegle eye thief :_: very sad!
>i don't see too much interest so i guess the spot will be available for a long time ;-
aww:( speaking of mc, have any cool builds??

>>81505342
>stolen by the glegle eye thief :_: very sad!
how did they get to pour the drink in the glass? hmm are you sure it's not ... pee?
>aww:( speaking of mc, have any cool builds??
picture this: a person that only goes mining, is at like -50 all the time, which you get to see once every 2 hours because he's looking for food and lives in a dirt house. that's me. i don't build anything because my artistic side is as developed as a fly, so... the answer is no :(

>>81505360
>how did they get to pour the drink in the glass? hmm are you sure it's not ... pee?
glegle would NEVER... glegle... uhhh, blindness gives you super senses!!!
>picture this: a person that only goes mining, is at like -50 all the time, which you get to see once every 2 hours because he's looking for food and lives in a dirt house
hmmm sounds like a modded enjoyer perhaps? mining in general can be relaxing tho!
>i don't build anything because my artistic side is as developed as a fly, so... the answer is no :(
awwww its never too late to develop!!

>>81505388
>uhhh, blindness gives you super senses!!!
but... looking at things is kinda nice... (except for my own reflection)
>hmmm sounds like a modded enjoyer perhaps?
not really! every once in a while i come to the surface and build big stuff. i remember i played mc with some friends, vanilla server, and i didnt have a house so my friend decided she'd build the house and do the farm and take care of stuff while i was out mining stuff for her to build. it was quite fun, she was also scared of mobs and liked axolotls
>awwww its never too late to develop!!
im old

>>81505471
>but... looking at things is kinda nice... (except for my own reflection)
aw:( im sry you feel that way abt urself:((
>not really! every once in a while i come to the surface and build big stuff. i remember i played mc with some friends, vanilla server, and i didnt have a house so my friend decided she'd build the house and do the farm and take care of stuff while i was out mining stuff for her to build. it was quite fun, she was also scared of mobs and liked axolotls
ah i see! that sounds like it was fun n cute!
>im old
never too old for creativity!!

>>81505558
>im sry you feel that way abt urself:((
its ok itll go away eventually.... i guess??
>that sounds like it was fun n cute!
yeah. the only bad thing was that she got mad at me whenever i drowned in lava haha she scolded me very often. now that you say this, i really liked this "create" mod, the swords one was cool too. simply swords, maybe? and this one that put new kinds of ender eyes so you couldnt speedrun the game
>never too old for creativity!!
you are so cheerful you make me cry

>>81505605
>its ok itll go away eventually.... i guess??
ya!!!
>yeah. the only bad thing was that she got mad at me whenever i drowned in lava haha she scolded me very often.
o lole, mined at the lava pool layer hm? i always mine a lil above it to be careful!!
>now that you say this, i really liked this "create" mod, the swords one was cool too. simply swords, maybe? and this one that put new kinds of ender eyes so you couldnt speedrun the game
sounds like you mightve played a modpack?? im not good with factory mods so create was never my tea, but ive always love decoration n new weapons/dimensions/whatnot mods!!
>you are so cheerful you make me cry
aww dont cry! D:

>>81505660
>mined at the lava pool layer hm? i always mine a lil above it to be careful!!
any layer is lava layer if you are deep enough!! :P
>>81505660
>sounds like you mightve played a modpack??
yes, it had like 100 mods!! it was cool. and hmm i remember the abyss mod? that one had new dimensions!! it was very cool and eerie, i loved it. do you know it??
>dont cry
i feel a bit sad. how are you feeling?

>>81505683
>any layer is lava layer if you are deep enough!! :P
hmmm true!! esp now with the caves!!
>yes, it had like 100 mods!! it was cool. and hmm i remember the abyss mod? that one had new dimensions!! it was very cool and eerie, i loved it. do you know it??
hmmmm theres a few mods that could be? sounds like the between lands perhaps?
>i feel a bit sad. how are you feeling?
aw:( im sry ur down, i feel alr now besides a headache

>>81505702
>esp now with the caves!
i like exploring ancient cities and running for your life after making atomic bomb noises OHH have you played alex caves? that one is so nice but my friends didnt appreciate me bombing their houses
>sounds like the between lands perhaps?
oh, i dont know that one. is it good?
>i feel alr now besides a headache
thats because u had alcohol and didnt drink enough water. bad bad bad

>>81505744
>i like exploring ancient cities and running for your life after making atomic bomb noises
too spooky for me!! xd
>OHH have you played alex caves? that one is so nice but my friends didnt appreciate me bombing their houses
its been in a modpack i played!! i liked the caves i found n the features! i dont remember bombing??
>oh, i dont know that one. is it good?
its prob one of the most feature rich dimension mods out i think rn!! very creepy n eerie atmosphere
>thats because u had alcohol and didnt drink enough water. bad bad bad
hm yes, more alcohol is called for maybe to hold the hangover back!!!!

>>81504645 (OP)
It was a real chill day anon, thanks for asking and good for you and your room, i don't know if I will manage to chill the week tho

>>81505767
>too spooky for me!! xd
ok its settled you are exploring ancient cities with me
>i dont remember bombing??
there is a cave type named toxic caves, you can mine uranium there and make a bomb. the explosion is so big, like very very big, and you can even die of radiation if you stay remotely close
>very creepy n eerie atmosphere
oooo that sounds awesome, ill have to try it out :D
>more alcohol is called for maybe to hold the hangover back!!!!
nooo dont do that, try drinking milk instead!!

>>81505783
>It was a real chill day anon, thanks for asking and good for you and your room, i don't know if I will manage to chill the week tho
im glad you had a good day anon! i hope youre week is also chill!!
>>81505796
>ok its settled you are exploring ancient cities with me
alr lol!
>there is a cave type named toxic caves, you can mine uranium there and make a bomb. the explosion is so big, like very very big, and you can even die of radiation if you stay remotely close
oooooo sounds cool n a bit scary xd!! hope ur friends werent too upset!!
>oooo that sounds awesome, ill have to try it out :D
hope u like it!
>nooo dont do that, try drinking milk instead!!
i had an extra shot and a fizzy water xd

>>81504645 (OP)

Been at work since 12pm. Not going to be getting home til at least midnight. Probably gonna cook up some chicken, eat some salad and watch scary movies when I get home.

My job is long, but I love it. The pay ain't bad either.

>>81505899
im glad you love your work anon! and you eat well too! what do you do, if you mind talking about it? i understand if not!

>>81505871
>hope ur friends werent too upset!!
they were. oh boy they were. i think i got spawn killed nearly 100 times afterwards, but it was worth it, i started a war i knew i was going to lose :D
>i had an extra shot and a fizzy water xd
don't do that!! nice anons don't drink!! (says the person who got drunk and made a drunk thread on r9k not long ago xd)

>>81505939
>they were. oh boy they were. i think i got spawn killed nearly 100 times afterwards, but it was worth it, i started a war i knew i was going to lose :D
sometimes... sacrifices must be made for fun!
>don't do that!! nice anons don't drink!! (says the person who got drunk and made a drunk thread on r9k not long ago xd)
but its fun!!! and i feel nice!!!

i just got home from the hospital/ emergency room 105 f fever. i got a uti on friday.

>>81505956
oh... oh no:( how are you feeling now?

>>81505955
>sacrifices must be made for fun!
it was totes worth it. in the end, i discovered atomic bombs could be used to farm ancient debris, so something good came out of it in the end
>and i feel nice!!!
how many drinks have you had? are you home and safe?

>>81504645 (OP)
I tried but somehow I ended up with less than nothing and I am fuking tired

>>81505978
>it was totes worth it. in the end, i discovered atomic bombs could be used to farm ancient debris, so something good came out of it in the end
hmmm... efficient... and ethical!!! nether cant get worse anyways!!
>how many drinks have you had? are you home and safe?
i have had like 5 shots of vodka n yes im home n safe

>>81505918

I work for the department of transportation. I mainly babysit highway rest stops and take care of the landscaping. It's a very chill job, and mowing is my therapy, so it's a perfect fit for me.

>>81505999
trips!!!! :D
do you want to talk about it anon? im sorry youre tired... iktf :_:
>>81506012
oh comfy!! i wish i could get a government job like that!!!

>>81506010
>nether cant get worse anyways!!
i think the nether is beautiful :( take that back!!! or i'll drown you in lava
>i have had like 5 shots of vodka n yes im home n safe
ok but remember to have something to eat so you dont throw up later please

>>81506072
>or i'll drown you in lava
nooooo! ok fine, the forests are KINDA PRETTY... kinda... not worth the trauma of building a wither skeleton farm :(
>ok but remember to have something to eat so you dont throw up later please
i have a burger:D

>>81506104
>nooooo! ok fine, the forests are KINDA PRETTY...
they're pretty! wait, are you a technical player? oh boy. now i really want to play with you so you can teach me all the good stuff
>i have a burger:D
what does your burger have? is it a cheese burger?

>>81506137
>they're pretty! wait, are you a technical player? oh boy. now i really want to play with you so you can teach me all the good stuff
im not rly technical no... just copy other peoples designs cus javamc redstone is a solved science xd
the most technical thing i ever made on my own was a modified borer to dig diamond

>>81506137
>what does your burger have? is it a cheese burger?
oh and uh, its cheese!

>>81506153
>cus javamc redstone is a solved science xd
logic gates are solved, yeah, so you can pretty much build almost anything with enough patience and redstone. i know a lot about digital circuits, but i'm too lazy to build stuff
>the most technical thing i ever made on my own was a modified borer to dig diamond
better than anything ive ever built
>>81506160
>oh and uh, its cheese!
cool :) take some bites inbetween shots

>>81506179
>logic gates are solved, yeah, so you can pretty much build almost anything with enough patience and redstone. i know a lot about digital circuits, but i'm too lazy to build stuff
hmmm engineer!? but for realzies, the redstone ppl have basically made an optimal design for everyth so it feels pointless to do anyth on my own unless im working around server limitations ._.
>better than anything ive ever built
i doubt it!!
>cool :) take some bites inbetween shots
i ran out of vodka so no more nways!!

>>81506023
>do you want to talk about it anon? im sorry youre tired... iktf :_:

Hosntly looking back at it it's not the end of the world but I was trying to make friends online with people in My country and I couldn't make friends with anyone or have a basic human connection it feels like i am a stranger in My home and actively being isolated by everyone

>>81506199
>Hosntly looking back at it it's not the end of the world but I was trying to make friends online with people in My country and I couldn't make friends with anyone or have a basic human connection it feels like i am a stranger in My home and actively being isolated by everyone
oh... :( what country are you from, if you dont mind that question?

>>81506215
Iraq Kurdistan i learnd English from a young age and i enjoyed the superior English media so much i couldn't eat the trash people make here witch i am thankful for but again I am isolated

>>81506197
>hmmm engineer!?
yes!
>but for realzies, the redstone ppl have basically made an optimal design for everyth
believe it or not, this happens in a lot of fields, most things are solved already... so there's no place for creativity. it's quite sad. but i still like doing things in a sub optimal way because i like figuring out ways to do things!
>i doubt it!!
it's better than a dirt house, isnt it?!?!?
>i ran out of vodka so no more nways!!
nice :) now you should go and find your nearest bed and sleep (irl, not minecraft)

>>81506247
>Iraq Kurdistan i learnd English from a young age and i enjoyed the superior English media so much i couldn't eat the trash people make here witch i am thankful for but again I am isolated
oh... thats rough, im sorry you feel isolated:( i hope you can find some friends there! i wish ik how to help
>>81506258
>yes!
waow
>believe it or not, this happens in a lot of fields, most things are solved already... so there's no place for creativity. it's quite sad. but i still like doing things in a sub optimal way because i like figuring out ways to do things!
hmmm fair... im just discouraged i suppose! if im solving a problem in mc id rather it be a build problem or fixing my buggy mod code
>it's better than a dirt house, isnt it?!?!?
not rly lole, just makes a big tunnel!!
>nice :) now you should go and find your nearest bed and sleep (irl, not minecraft)
is not even dark tho :_;

>>81506299
>im just discouraged i suppose! if im solving a problem in mc id rather it be a build problem or fixing my buggy mod code
do you like coding? that's pretty cool!! but solving any kind of problems makes your brain work and thats nice
>not rly lole, just makes a big tunnel!!
automatic mining? how is that not cool?!?!
>is not even dark tho :_;
what time is it where you live?

>>81506331
>do you like coding? that's pretty cool!! but solving any kind of problems makes your brain work and thats nice
hmmm sometimes... when i get things to work xd
>automatic mining? how is that not cool?!?!
i supposeeee... it blew itself up ALOT... like, unsustainably for anyone but me on the server
>what time is it where you live?
it is 8pm!

>>81506354
>when i get things to work xd
well, yeah. programming can be frustrating... do you code for fun? iirc you weren't studying compsci, are you?
> unsustainably for anyone but me on the server
just like the atomic bombs. i like this, i approve
>it is 8pm!
drinking quite early huh?

>>81506429
>well, yeah. programming can be frustrating... do you code for fun? iirc you weren't studying compsci, are you?
ya, i code for fun for the most part!
>just like the atomic bombs. i like this, i approve
lol
>drinking quite early huh?
yes, it doesnt rly make much of a difference to me when im drinking at home

>>81506445
>ya, i code for fun for the most part!
thats pretty cool :)
> it doesnt rly make much of a difference to me when im drinking at home
is there any particular reason you're drinking? or are you drinking just because you were craving alcohol?

>>81504645 (OP)
nearing inbox zero. I'm happy

>>81506458
>thats pretty cool :)
i guess lol i have a long ways to go to do what i want
>is there any particular reason you're drinking? or are you drinking just because you were craving alcohol?
i am a little sad someone ghosted me a few days ago
>>81506478
yay

>>81506492
thanks for keeping the thread positive anon. we need more /sig/ on 4chan

>>81506500
isnt /sig/ a pol thing? but i try to keep things positive and encouraging for anons!! thanks!!!

>>81506547
self-improvement is common to many boards. in fact, these days making /sig/ threads on /pol/ get you a ban (their goal is demoralization) but there's always a /sig/ thread on >>>/lgbt/ and sometimes on >>>/fit/

>>81506556
i see i see!!
i dont think i ever interacted with /sig/ so i didnt know
i just want anons to be happy and nice, it feels nice being nice

>>81506492
>i have a long ways to go to do what i want
that's what matters! it doesn't matter if your code is o(n^n)
>i am a little sad someone ghosted me a few days ago
oh... do you want to talk about it? if you want we can be friends and i wont ghost you. im a bit dumb tho

>>81506570
/sig/ threads on some boards can have an "edge" for sure but that's not the core. the best comparison for yourself is yourself a week ago - are you making progress? :)
thanks for keeping the thread alive. I'm an infrequent visitor of this board but your thread immediately jumped out to me.
my gift to this thread is a book recommendation: Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman. it tells you how individuals can cultivate a more optimistic outlook on life.
male depression is nearly always a result of learned helplessness. but health providers treat it like female depression and try to make men feel loved instead of powerful. men need to increase our power and agency above all things.
We need to increase your locus of control. even if ~everything is out of your control (crappy parents, crappy living environment, never mind politics that no regular person has control over), there are things still WITHIN your control. for example, you can control your body (e.g. by exercising and eating right) and you can control your learning.

>>81506615
more friends is always good and youre nice so sure!!! uh, if u want to leave a disc tag or smth, i can make an alt but itd take longer!!
>>81506623
>are you making progress? :)
i kind of slid this week!! but im trying to get back on track!!
>thanks for keeping the thread alive. I'm an infrequent visitor of this board but your thread immediately jumped out to me.
yw!!!!
>my gift to this thread is a book recommendation: Learned Optimism by Martin Seligman. it tells you how individuals can cultivate a more optimistic outlook on life.
ty for the book recommendation, idk how much the stuff about male vs female depression applies to me, cus i dont rly have a power desire, but i hope it helps another anon out there reading the thread!!

>>81506695
>dk how much the stuff about male vs female depression applies to me, cus i dont rly have a power desire, but i hope it helps another anon out there reading the thread!!
for sure - we don't need to box ourselves into categories. women (as a group) have certain struggles and men (as a group) have other struggles but each individual is an individual. I'm a man so I can't simulate a woman's mind but I think the book is universal not male-coded :)
you can get it on libgen.rs if you want to start reading now

>>81506719
ill check it out, maybe read abit of it tonight when im less tipsy! thx again anon!!

>>81506695
>if u want to leave a disc tag or smth
send me your tag to newlyfreshboooo@proton.me !

>>81506840
just add jerasosakii :D

bumping. this deserves to be on page 1

>>81507298
ty kind anon, front page nice page!!

>>81504645 (OP)
I'm doing ok, last night went to a couple of bars with a friend, forced myself to chat up random girls so my friend was able to talk to their friends, I had no stake in it because I'm a Vol-cel, but it did make me feel sad that even though we had good conversation, I'm pretty sure most girls just wanted free drinks.

>>81504645 (OP)
small victory are good many small make big

>>81507374
:( im glad you had some good conversations at least, glad ur doing ok!!
>>81507390
very true!

>>81507422
bury true
bury nice

>>81507422
Yeah, ok is a bit stretched really, more like deflated if anything, And they expect us to keep approaching? I can understand why the incels want to avoid it all together. Guess we just gotta keep on keeping on.

>>81504645 (OP)
>go fishing with dad for first time in a while, cus le summer
>he forgets the rods
still had a good time metal detecting and found two giant rusty bolts

>>81507464
based son/dad activity. happy father's day!

>>81507438
a bury bury...
>>81507440
aw:( ya,i hope you dont let it get to you too much
>>81507464
sounds like fun fathers day memories anon!! glad you two had fun:)

>>81507483
These are the bolts
Also forgot to mention I met a Canadian WOMAN

>>81507612
those are cool bolts:D
and a woman anon??? someone you might like??

>>81507628
She was an actual Canadian, probably Quebec since she sounded a little french.

Only problem was she is on vacation here with her family, though she mentioned she was single

>>81504645 (OP)
Bad I couldn't find anyone to follow today

>>81507666
awwww:( youll find someone closer maybe!!
>>81507707
im not sure what u mean? follow?

>>81507817
I meant stalking

>>81507861
why do u do stalk?

>>81507916
>why do u do stalk?
it's fun desu

>>81507929
do you do anything like rape or something? If you do that's a bit fucked but if it's just an observatory thing that's not so bad

>>81507929
um well... if ur not hurting anyone then thats cool!!!

>>81507946
>do you do anything like rape or something?
No, that's too far

>>81507960
So you just watch people?
I do that but I stay in one place and just observe around me

this is a nice thread desuu

>>81508034
this poster rapes kids daily btw

>>81508034
bury true!
>>81508047
this is a nice thread please be nice in it! how was your day anon?

>>81504645 (OP)
sadly no victories for me today, but I'm happy for you OP

>>81504645 (OP)
lost my virginity today which was awesome

I had a small victory today I didn't cry this time when I thought about her

>>81508265
there is always tomorrow anon!!!
>>81508273
congrats :D
>>81508312
awww, one step at a time anon... any victory is a good victory!

>>81508372
>there is always tomorrow anon!!!
yeah!
>awww, one step at a time anon... any victory is a good victory!
thanks ^_^
sorry I didn't realize I posted twice (I forget sometimes)

>>81504645 (OP)
Found out a guy I met on 4chan in the past committed suicide recently. Honestly I feel relieved but sick for feeling relief. We dated for a month, I took his v-card, he lied to me a bunch so I broke things off with him, he got obsessive to a stalker level and posted my nudes everywhere pretending to be me and in his own words he wanted to 'destroy' me even 7 years later. I filed a police report on him in the past but I was soo ashamed and scared to press charges. I always thought to myself 'I wish he'd die' or 'I wouldn't care if he ever died' and now he has...and I am so relieved and happy to know I am free from this dark looming cloud after all this time.

>>81508413
post em if you get em

Deep depression. Managed to do my workout anyway and keep my stupid Duolingo streak going. 800+ days. Yay. Cleaned room. Bathed myself. Bathed dog. Don't want to let the filth pile up again. Brushed teeth. Kinda let the fatigue overtake me and napped instead of eating for most of the day. Didn't feel like seeing anyone really. Just zoned out and scrolled. Called dad in the evening just so that Father's Day wouldn't have passed without me saying hello. A lot of my body just feels bad. Don't really feel like doing anything or feel anything except sad. Might just lie back down. Felt like maybe doing something since it's late and my mind races at night but whatever. Lately I'm never too alert to go back to bed.

I realized I dont hate women and Ive just been coping about myself being fucked
I cant sleep

>>81504645 (OP)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9_hCjcFNO0&list=RDi9_hCjcFNO0&start_radio=1&pp=ygUdZmFpdGggbm8gbW9yZSBhIHNtYWxsIHZpY3RvcnmgBwE%3D