my phone just ruined my entire fucking life - /r9k/ (#81548356) [Archived: 948 hours ago]

Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:05:11 AM No.81548356
1722137029123791
1722137029123791
md5: 42ca22c808ec3cb6acaba2617debc09f🔍
so i'm loading into the family car with my dad and lil sis in the back like a true neetcel parasite. phone instantly autoconnects to the bluetooth and before i can even alt+f4, my last pornhub tab just fucking BUSTS the speakers at full vol with some nasty throat-gagging "good girl daddy" shit. absolute ear-raping slop. nobody's said a word since.
i legit want to an-hero. someone just take me out back and shoot me already.
Replies: >>81548369 >>81548377 >>81548390 >>81548392 >>81548409 >>81548424 >>81548845 >>81549147 >>81549550 >>81549631 >>81549817
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:07:01 AM No.81548369
>>81548356 (OP)
i aint even gonna hold you that would probably be my last straw, nigger
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:08:02 AM No.81548377
>>81548356 (OP)
You can't even play it off as a joke. Best option is to just apologize sincerely instead of saying nothing so at least they know you're remorseful, (assuming you are).
Replies: >>81548408
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:09:25 AM No.81548390
>>81548356 (OP)
did they know you were like this anon or did they just figure out
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:09:49 AM No.81548392
>>81548356 (OP)
You ALWAYS close porn when you are done looking at it. You learned this lesson the hard way. I never had to, fortunately
Replies: >>81548854
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:09:58 AM No.81548395
At least it wasn't gay porn and husky men talking to each other. You could've got caught broke back mountain style.
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:11:50 AM No.81548408
There's no coming back anon that's gonna haunt your memories whenever you close your eyes from now on

>>81548377
i don't think so. NEETs don't usually have a great relationship with family so playing it off as a joke would just come off weird.
I'm assuming anon is a NEET but it's more likely than not
Replies: >>81548420
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:11:57 AM No.81548409
>>81548356 (OP)
If you were chadson your sister would get wet and stroke your cock off under a blanket. I had a chad buddy growing up and his OLDER sister gave him a handjob on a family road trip and ate the cum off her hand. She ended up teaching him how to have sex and they would fuck regularly for years
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:13:15 AM No.81548420
>>81548408
>i don't think so. NEETs don't usually have a great relationship with family so playing it off as a joke would just come off weird.
I literally said he can't
Replies: >>81548430
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:14:23 AM No.81548424
>>81548356 (OP)
>connects instantly to the family car
you usually watch porn in the family car?
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 4:15:06 AM No.81548430
>>81548420
Sorry anon i'm retarded and it's late nght
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:04:53 AM No.81548842
welp. you gotta kys. sorry anon. see you in the next life.
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:05:10 AM No.81548845
>>81548356 (OP)
I cant stand those auto connecting car Bluetooth jew machines. I will never own a car newer than 2005. My condolences, OP.
Replies: >>81548861
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:06:01 AM No.81548854
>>81548392
I have a habit of wanting to clean up the nut immediately then forgetting I had porn open.
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:06:32 AM No.81548861
>>81548845
why, you worried you're gonna blare your pornos to your daddy as well?
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:14:29 AM No.81548918
Should have bluetooth off anyway unless you're actively using it, it's a known vulnerability
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:36:42 AM No.81549116
holy shit dude you just gave your whole family PTSD. that's peak autism, congrats on fucking up your gene pool
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 5:40:31 AM No.81549147
>>81548356 (OP)
Total gooner embarrasment
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 6:28:04 AM No.81549550
>>81548356 (OP)
Actual retard detected. Your entire existence is a symptom of society's failure. You think blasting porn sounds in front of your family is funny or relatable? No, you're just a gross, hopeless loser that everyone already hates.
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 6:36:43 AM No.81549631
>>81548356 (OP)
You watch porn, so what? Everyone masturbates at least once in their life. You will look back on that as a haha, that happened moment in a few years. Move on.
Replies: >>81549648
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 6:38:38 AM No.81549648
>>81549631
>Everyone masturbates
Normies have girlfriends so they don't need to jerk off. It's moslty just incels which is shameful unto itself jerking off to porn
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 6:59:43 AM No.81549817
>>81548356 (OP)
I mean that's not that weird. Some internet weirdos that have some past issues tend to kick up a fuss about that shit. It's normal for people dating to call eachother mommy or daddy, they're planning a future together where they have sex and are a mommy and daddy. I think it'd get real akward if she was like OH YEAH GLUG GLUG UNGLE GIMMY GLUG GLUG FASHE FUG GLUG GLUG ME. It'd be a lot weirder if you were like self inserting in the weird molesty uncle kind of thing.
Anonymous
6/20/2025, 7:02:25 AM No.81549840
Post the exact video that played, or larp