I'm basically a normie, have a social circle and have a routine plan daily but something feels empty still every positive interaction with people is at arms length with them nothing too intimate. Sure working out makes me feel good but I want security and to be grounded. Not live up to the expectations of other people want me to be. This realization is starting to fuck with my schedules, started calling in sick to work more frequently I'm afraid to lose my only financial security. Constant feelings of impending doom looming over me than I never felt before like a black void gnawing at my core. The games i play become distractions from that empty feeling and from my thoughts. Starting to lose my mind, I don't like this feeling. People around me notice I'm changing for the worse either distance themselves from me or becoming condescending. I'm only 19 already my life is starting to fall apart.

>>81554719 (OP)
Have you tried making a blood ritual covenant with the ineffable Logos?