Thread 81588927

I've been working with children for the last few years with my country's version of CPS

The way adults treat children is bizarre, making up silly rules and then acting like these rules are set in stone, until it's convenient for them to suddenly change them. At this point i hear specific things and i know instantly they are a shit parent.

"we have a rule in this house"
which you made up, and know is dumb, so you pretend it's some kind of magical rule that has always existed.

"well, the policy is"
no, what the fuck are you talking about? policy? no it's your opinion, your personal rules, not policy like this is a fucking Starbucks.

"He was talking back to me!"
yes... that's how conversations work... you say something, and the other person talks back

"he was being disrespectful!"
oh, the kid wasn't constantly glazing your ego an treating you like a god, I see.

"look, i back my partner up 100% because we are always united so the kids can't play us off one another"
His wife stole their son's birthday money to buy something for herself. this kind of thing ALWAYS leads to a child being abused because the other parent will side with their partner no matter what. Why do you, as an adult, need to gang up on a literal child?

"Teach him a lesson!"
They will commit bizarre child abuse when they get home

"give him something to cry about!"
They will violently abuse their child when they get home

"nobody talks to my kid without me in the room! YOU ARENT ALLOWED TO TALK TO MY CHILD!"
100% they are abusing their child. every single time. Today In a first interview with a parent and child the parent said this. I wrote down "Abuse 100% taking place" and showed it to my supervisor. would you believe it, they were cooking meth and using their 9 year old as a drug mule. what a shock I was right again

>>81588927 (OP)
Dealing with narcissists....

>>81588927 (OP)
recently, there was a boy who had completely stopped listening to his mother, doesn't care what she says. In school or sports or with his dad he's fine, but as of a month ago pretends his mother doesn't exist

Rule 1: no tablets in the kitchen because if you drop it the tiles might get broken
Rule 2: no food in the living room so the carpet doesn't get dirty

Kid set up his tablet in the living room facing him and sat in the kitchen eating. She took the tablet away from him for "being a smartass". Actually he didn't break your rules, why are you punishing him? why should he take any of your rules seriously if you will punish him for not actually breaking them?

>>81588927 (OP)
I had a gf that would get up in the middle of the night and lock her son's door then in the morning would scream at the kid for locking his door, and use the locking his door as a pretext to gaslight him into thinking he was deeply disturbed. The mask off demeanor change, when I told her I knew what she was doing and tried to talk to her about the psychological warfare she was waging against her son, was spooky.

>>81588927 (OP)
give him something to cry about!
I've heard this CONSTANTLY from my father whenever he's around his crying grandkids and I fucking hate it.

>>81589014
you can learn a lot about people from how they treat children

>>81588927 (OP)
We wouldn't be in half as much of a mess as we are in nowadays if parents were allowed to properly discipline...sorry I meant "beat the shit out of"...sorry that should have been """""""""abuse""""""""" their crotchfruit.

>>81589052
Same. You can read all about it in my new book I'm writing with chatgpt

>>81589257
Yeah, he's certainly a narcissist as well. Crazy how common narcissistic behavior is among boomers.

>>81589155
You would have white niggers, retard, new generations aren't stunted or distracted enough by socialisation to ignore their surroundings.

>>81589090
When considering a single mother, I observe how she treats her kids. This one was pretty rough around the edges, but I felt she had good instincts towards her kids. She had really good kids, and this animosity she had for them was really uncalled for.

>>81589155
Op again here.
If there was a Venn Diagram about people who refer to children as things such as crotch fruit, or sex trophies or some other gross dehumanizing term that seems to forget that children are people, and child abusers , it would almost be a circle

>>81589411
What is the actual consequence of being cruel to your own children?
Nothing. If you acted like this towards other adults in your life they would be severe consequences. What you're actually seeing is how she wants to treat everyone in her life

>>81588927 (OP)
That bird is probably still alive. They live for as long as people do, maybe longer.

>>81589440
Just wait till the abused child grows up and tells his abusive parents he's gonna beat the shit out of them. They immediately threaten to call the cops

>>81588927 (OP)
Y-yeah but, don't you know how hard it is to be a parent? They're doing the best they can. It's not like you're perfect either. The world doesn't owe you anything. If you can't function properly after having lived a life in a fucked up household, it's a skill issue.

>>81589666
>"people can be a horrible parents because parenting is, le hard!!!!!!!! it's the kid's fault for being fucked up by their parents!!!!!"

actual monkey brain thinking

>>81589440
>What is the actual consequence of being cruel to your own children?
>Nothing.
Lol. It's a lifetime of hatred.

>>81590331
I think Satan was being sarcastic

>>81588927 (OP)
>"give him something to cry about!"
>They will violently abuse their child when they get home
Haha yeah. My mom would hit us then when we cried she would hit us harder while telling us since we want to cry she will give us a real reason to cry.

>>81588975
The adolescent can deduce the literal, surface level intention of the rule, but the kid (through the fault of the parent for providing a shallow version of their intention) mistakes their deducted intention for the adult's actual intention. They assume that if they abide by the most obvious interpretation of the rule, then they will be okay. But this conflicts with the adult's actual intention because their shallow rule fails to convey their concern. The adult will view the kid's breaking of the shallow rule as a violation of their actual intention. It would have made more sense to have said "Hey I want you to be fully present while eating with me/other people". Even if the kid was still upset, it would be a more suitable challenge for them to grow from it.

My own parents did this correctly (for example) when forcing me to play a sport every summer. Their reasoning, they told me, was "We want you to be familiar with a sport and to participate in a form of exercise." This allowed me to then work on processing the thoughts and feelings which arose from that. I would feel very upset because I didn't want to spend time playing sports (I wanted to just play videogames for 16 hours per day), but because I had an understanding of the ultimate purpose, I was able to mentally get over it and accept it.

This has made dealing with future struggles in life much easier, btw, because it is a useful concept that applies to much more than just childhood rules (as with all important childhood/mental developments).

>>81588927 (OP)
Gabe Fernandez. Kept showing up in school with bruises, black eyes, missing clumps of hair and teeth (adult not baby) - told his teacher and principal he was being abused in the home. They called child services *NINETEEN* times and every time the CPS agent showed up, asked the parents a few questions then left (and they gave Gabe a worse beating after). Eventually he died from the abuse and the mom got what she deserved in prison, but still not enough.

Another key sign when they accuse the child of "lying" or being "manipulative" - sure sign they have those traits and are scapegoating their victim.

>>81589503
Abusers always lie, always victim blame, and always double down when called out. Key signs of cluster B.

>>81589666
Checked
>the kid keeps MAKING ME ANGRY! he KNOWS what he's doing!

>>81591304
Here is the flip side.
Poorfag has custody of his two daughters, 17 year old has the only room, 13 year old and father are sleeping on a hide a bed in the living room. CPS gets involved, even though the investigation determined no abuse was occurring the 13 year old is placed with her mother, the mother has an active herion addiction and within a month the 13 year old has been raped by one of the scum bags her mother had hanging around.