How many times have you had to re-think your life because of a false premise you had gets shattered? I should have seen this one coming too.
>male, 27, gaycel
>turned on by masculinity, but whenever I date a guy therr is something lacking
>think im just low libido
>3 weeks ago I'm hanging out with a faghag (girl whos into homos)
>everything comes naturally, sex is good
>spent the last 8-9 years with a homosexual life premise, worldview, so this is a mindfuck
>turns out my attraction to masculinity only applys to when im being that way or with a girl
>im just a standard male afterall with some attrqction towards acting like a dude and tomboys
sexhaver, boring sexhaver
>>81598178Sexhaver, but at what cost? I can't be with cute guys anymore :/
Demoralization thread: even faggots have sex with women.
>>81598199Dont worry about me stealing the female dating pool. Im apparently only into the type of girl who dresses super butch.
>>81598294Based. Girls look infinitely hotter like this:
>>81598312How do you feel about ftms? I find them quite appealing.
>>81598321Idk. I thought I was more into men than I apparently am. So I guess it's too much. I wanna be the hot guy now, not be with the hot guy. But the tomboy angle is easier for me to wrap my head around.
>>81598199Also, having just been in the gay community, you'd be fucking surprised how many fags slip their dicks into women.
>>81598158 (OP)Not sure why this gets me going so much lol
>>81599337Why do you say that? It's over for gaycels, lol.
>>81598158 (OP)I also found out I was straight in my twenties, and realized that the whole lgbt thing is, more often than not, hurt people hurting people.
>>81600740How long did it take for your preferences to change? Was it natural and what was it like adjusting to that?
Its crazy how many other parts of my worldview will probably change too.
>>81600763It all went pretty naturally for me, since it all was my own doing. I've had two girlfirends in the time since, sex has never been a problem. My boyfriend and I were hedons in our early twenties, just smoking, drinking and fucking our childhood trauma away all day. We split because we came to the conclusion we both wanted normal lives, wives and kids some day. I moved halfway across the country and slowly waned off gay porn by getting into muscular girls, then tomboys, then I started plapjaking, and now I'm aiming for normal women. This was over the course of about two years. Its a process, but it can be done, nobody has ever "suspected" anything of me, but I'm naturally a decently manipulative person.
My overall worldview hasn't changed much, I still believe people should do whatever they want. My biology just so happened to kick in, and I'm acting on it before its too late and I'm sucking dicks under bridges at 35. Its just not for me.
>>81600990How do you find the sexual aspect? From conditioning to women to sex? Is it pleasurable?
>>81601163Its completely fine. My dick still works and it doesn't discriminate. The first night I spent with a woman in my bed was much more psychologically rewarding than it was sexually. I was thinking to myself, holy shit, this is what everyone else has been up to this whole time, I completely get it. It feels normal and you can get off without wanting to kill yourself afterward.
>>81601318How long does that psychological high of "being normal" last? It seems like a huge confidence boost! It sounds awesome.
>>81601318That sounds really cool actually. Like, what were you thinking with the girl in your bed or afterwards? Did you resolve to write off men completely? How did you adjust your tastes and do you see yourself as a normal straight guy now?
>>81601366It never went away, part of the high comes from feeling like I got away with something tbdesu
>>81601381If anything, after that experience I started thinking less, and stopped pathologizing everything. I still jerk off of to gay porn sometimes, its neither here nor there, most women do the same exact thing. I present myself as normal, and blend in with blue collar middle-american coworkers. Obviously I'm not 100% conventionally heterosexual, but I see no reason why I couldn't be a good husband and dad one day.
>>81601560You're always gonna feel the confidence of switching to women? That's so fucking based. Do you reccomend more fags to do this? Is it almost like wearing a disguise or a mask?
>>81601560Did you make a commitment to only be with women from now on? Thaf would be a huge boost.
>>81598158 (OP)I hated being gay due to the hookup culture so much that I psy-opped myself into becoming straight, only to realize that I exclusively attract mentally ill women that get off by demolishing my will to live.
Best thing to ever happen for my self-acceptance journey though, being a fag doesn't bother me at all anymore, because it CAN get worse.
>>81601728God fucking damn it does my story sound like something a straight woman would get off to?
>>81598158 (OP)Four, going on five. Mostly relating to employment and finances.
im in the middle of one, sorta. i figured i had waited long enough to start asking questions about what exactly happened to me back at highschool. i think im basically prison gay/bisexual because of a series of stupid events. i think this is what happened.
>have non-standard dick. figure this out pretty early in life and fix it, but in doing so ended up researching and learning a lot about dicks. at like, 12 years old. thank you internet for the help.
>skip forward, get a first real proper gf. already looking at lots of internet porn, and its straight stuff. weird, sure, like furry and whatever fetishes, but straight. pretty desensitized to what i was looking at since i had already been exposed to a lot of medical pictures of dicks in distress
>shes got some medical issue. cant actual sex. becomes the bane of my existence, start avoiding sex because the roadblock is literally her vagina
i dont know the timing on this part, but now im thinking its connected
>start looking at gay stuff. mixed in with the regular stuff, but also start focusing on butt stuff. not sure when specifically, but at some point i decide vaginas look gross, and start avoiding that in porn. still girls, but butt sex. no vaginas k thanks.
>break up with girl, after many years of basically...avoiding her vagina
>she gets pregnant something like 3 months later with someone else
>haha holy shit what goodbye self esteem and self worth
that was over a decade ago and since then and nothings really changed. i look at gay/bisexual/straight smutt, and pretty much skip anything if its vaginal penetration or whatever, and irl i might notice a girl that looks hot occasionally and then forget about it, but ive never seen a guy in real life thats made me look twice or whatever, felt any attraction to. so what, did i just get prison gay'd to 2dpd shit because i i just rolled some shit dice rolls for life? finally writing some it out, some of those dots seem to connect. fug.
>>81601741Yes since it's so gynocentric and about women being literal angels and since it's another one of your boring orienation play fictions, try harder next time
>>81601663I'd say that anybody who has had an identity crisis, or feels like theres something wrong with their sexuality, should try branching out and seeing what feels right, at the very least. For me, heterosexuality feels like less of a mask as time goes on, and instead, its just the way it was supposed to be.
>>81601674Yeah, that decision was my starting point. I saw a future I didn't like if I didn't change now. I got out all my gay shit while I was young, I'm lucky. Lots of people fold to the pressure of repressed trauma when they're 50 and married with two kids.
>>81602243with a girl. he had sex with a girl without having sex with a guy despite being "gay".
>>81603590Just a prison gay , at least a prison straight wouldn't be that vocal about his love for women and them being his life creed. He was never gay to begin with.
>>81601921How did u muster the willpower to go completely straight?