Literally want to get revenge on these people who ostracized me from this big community. Like so much so that it feels like I got canceled from the internet completely, and there's little or no way I can make any new friends online. Maybe dox them or whatever but every time I think about attempting the act, I question what that would actually do to make me happy. Also they know everything about me too so its not like I could get away that easily. Point is, they fucked me over and there's nothing I can really do without there being consequences so I'm stuck in this loop of anger cause of those people.

>>81684172 (OP)
Hm what happened exactly? And what was that "big community"?
Did you just want to vent or do you wanna talk about it?

>>81684239

Without giving too much away, the online community revolves a real life convention for a fandom that I invested a lot of time into.

The people I were close with I knew both online and irl because of connecting with them and had invested a good chunk of my life this decade so far to this circle. However, they all had their mental problems like me but I was banned from said community over learning someone's name at their own house when I was invited to meetup in a group with some of the people I was closest with.

This "no name" figure, is both staff and security for this convention so he had a bit of say on what could be enforced, even bending them a little to protect his interests, but was also super schizo and paranoid about anything related to his identity being out there either online, and especially irl. One day, despite giving consent to having me and others come over to his place for a meetup when invited. I didn't know his problems were that psychotic. None of the others told me getting into this but I at least knew even leaving pre maturely over being concerned for my well being he would start acting up. This guy was crazy too. Wore a facemask + mosquito hat anywhere he went to hide his face, the mother being an enabler for his problems, and kept a hawks eye on every move me and others did in the house. I "snooped" around behind his back for my own well being cause for a moment, I didn't know who this guy was aside for minimal past interactions at said convention. His position didn't matter to me. I say snooping very lightly too cause for someone who wanted to go by "no name," and hide everything related to his identity in his own house, he sure didn't do a good job when there were shipping labels of his info right next to the main entrance.

>>81684468
The problem wasnt just that you learned his name I assume? You probably told others about it no?

>>81684468
So the meetup passes, and I hangout with one of the other guys from that stay without the rest after this somewhere else a few weeks later. I bring up a conversation on the matter of how crazy no name is, and told the guy that I found out his name and so on. Mind you, this guy who ultimately rats me out, didn't know his name at the time, didn't care, and despite the major red flags, believed that he should be allowed to "live however he wants." That was the statement I got later from someone who told me because he would stop talking to me, I'd be berated by everyone else for doing such a heinous thing. Furthermore, the rest of the people in that circle who were there twisted the story and made it sound much worse for what I did on my end when I wasn't going to do anything. Yet with what they did to me, here I am almost a year later thinking nonstop about how I feel betrayed, angry, and with all this information about the people who backstabbed me, I want revenge for the community ostracizing me, although I have no friends on the internet so it really feels like I'm in an echo chamber repeating the same thoughts over and over again. Been told to let go, move on, and no matter what I do, nothing changes mentally cause I'm lonelier than ever! Even if those people were red flags, especially no name, there was a point where they meant a lot to me as friends, and that I was happy longer in that circle than not.

>>81684516
They claimed other things like I used them for travel, and that I wasn't legitimate for wanting to hang out. Even though I've let some of these people stay at my place, ect.

As for spreading this guys name, no. I never did. Never even told the one guy who was also in the same house with me his name despite still ratting me out. I understand that spreading personal information online is one thing, but wtf is wrong with people when they're so terminally online that they can't separate irl stuff with online stuff when we're both face to face?

>>81684571
Honestly I feel they probably just wanted any exuse they could throw at you because they just didnt want you around anymore.
I cant relate going to others peoples places and getting friends at cons but if you managed once you can do it again probably.
Revenge sounds dumb and pointless to me