Sorry to intrude, but I've got a boyfriend, who used to browse this board, so I wanted to see if I could get some advice from people who might be similar to him.

We met online and have been in an LDR for years, knowing each other for longer. He's always had this fetish that requires the woman to be fully dressed during intimacy, and didn't really care for nudity or actual sex. But he changed after getting a construction job that required him to eat well, sleep well, and work long hard hours in the sun. He became very interested in nudity and sex, constantly wishing to sext or see pictures in his breaks. He left his job after a month and we met up in person, and while he wasn't as forwards as he was while on the job, he was still interested in having sex as long as it was with the fetish wear.
When we tried having sex for the first time, he gave up pretty quickly when we couldn't figure it out, and wasn't interested in sex for the rest of the trip. Which was fine, as I understood he's always had some fears when it came to failing sex. But even after the trip, he didn't even return to sexting. After a year we sexted maybe 2-3 times with it only being fetish related and no longer returning to sex or nudity.
When we met up again for a few months, even after doing everything I can and preparing all his fetish gear, we were only intimate 2-3 times with only fetish stuff. I asked him if he just wasn't attracted to me anymore, and he vehemently denied it being the case, he said he is definitely attracted to me, but he can't bring himself to be intimate, it's like there's some mental block preventing him from doing it. He said he thinks it's his fears when it comes to being closer or failing at sex, and he said he would return back to the intimacy we used to have. But nothing changed after months, he just says he isn't in the mood.

I don't know if it is fears or if being healthy again will help him. I'm just hoping someone out there knows how to fix this

>>81798326 (OP)
Why do you care? Just find someone else who can get it up to get your rocks off with.

He's probably gay dumbass. Seeing all those hot burly construction workers all day made him horny.

>>81798326 (OP)
He's low T from doing nothing. Also, is he unemployed the entire time outside that one month period? Because if so, then >>81798444

>>81798326 (OP)
Classic Madonna-Whore complex.

>>81798444
Because I love him faggot, why else? I don't want to be intimate with just anyone, I only want to be intimate with him. Without him in the picture, I wouldn't want to have sex at all.

>>81798472
LOL, made me laugh, but if you were serious, it's not the case either.

>>81798485
He's employed at a different job, but he works inside, just low activity office work. I seriously wonder if it's low T, but I'm not sure how I can help him get to healthy levels of T. He wouldn't have time to be working out in the hot sun all day anymore

>>81798592
If you mean him, no it's not the case. He does get aroused, but he can't manage to engage in intimacy. It makes him upset that he can't seem to

>>81798326 (OP)
Intimacy troubles mixed with >>81798592
You have two options here:
1. Do it step by step, every time he needs to stop do it and give him time, don't force things. Also don't try to take the lead or he will feel even more pressured.
2. Make him feel so fed up with you that basically he ragefucks your coochie all at once.
Option 1 is the wholesome approach, while option 2 may constitute rape if you don't consent at some point so be careful if you decide to unleash the high T beast in him...

>>81798723
We're in an LDR so I can't really do it step by step until we meet again. I often try to coast intimate topics by bringing up past experiences, by showing him images related to his fetish, or by sending pictures of myself and he either is oblivious to it and doesn't pay attention, picks up on it and says hes not in the mood for that stuff, or says "awesome stuff, makes me want to jerk off, goodnight".
He's kind of autistic if you couldn't tell.

And if I did keep pressuring him, I don't think he'd hate fuck me, but rather would completely shut off from it. He seems to hate the idea of being forced/pressured into doing something, so I try to avoid stuff like that

He's got all the attraction for it, all the desire, but none of the action for it.
Thank you for the advice anon

>>81798326 (OP)
He has erectile dysfunction. He will suffer from this the rest of his life and will need to.
It's not your fault.

Whatever your experience with him now in bed is, expect the same the rest of your life n

>>81799149
Nah, he has no trouble getting it up, absolute no issue with blood flow, nor any issues with keeping it up. His only issue is when it comes to acting on it

>>81798834
Sounds like he is asexual in addition to his erectile dysfunction and would be more comfortable with platonic love than sexual. That's why he tries to change from asexual fein interest so he does just enough that he doesn't have to so more.

>>81799194
Again, not ED and he's not asexual. I've known him for many years before we started dating, he was into sex and women then and still is today. I've even asked him if he'd feel more comfortable if I stop expecting intimacy from him, and he said he doesn't want that, as he still wants to have intimacy, he just can't seem to do it.
Believe me, I wouldn't so confidently state that I know his attraction/asexuality is not a concern if I didn't have enough concrete evidence that this is not the issue at all

The only other thing is he could be repressed gender dysphoric. Not comfortable with using his male body or using the female as he wants to be female. That's why he hyper focused on clothing, taking them on and off different things like that because it's like playing with a Barbie and imagining as you. If he stopped asking essentially got bored with the dress up stuff in any sexual activity triggers is gender dysphoria he feels very uncomfortable being a boy and the action TO the the girl. Treatment for gender dysphoria is transition.

I suggest you do not do that

>>81799268
I hope this helps you

Based on everything that you presented erectile dysfunction, asexual, gender dysphoria.

Anything small like anxiety would have been work through at this point, he has something going on fundamentally at his core so it's a bigger issue for him than just do it.
You mentioned he is autistic (ish). There's a pretty high comorbidity with gender dysphoria and autism, meaning if he has autism he's much more likely to have gender dysphoria then any other person to just develop it on its own.
The hyper fixation on clothing kink reads more as a projection of what he wishes he had, experiencing his feminine sexuality through you.

>>81798643
>it's not the case either.
Why do ppl ask for advice then immediately reject all advice. I hope you seriously get killed by a fucking bus op. Fucking piece of shit

I just wanted to say that I admire your fortitude and faithfulness. That's a long time that you have not had your needs met. And having the compassion and want to help and taking that action step of making a post here, it should be acknowledged.

>>81799270
Are you a tranny or something? You seem to be really fixated on sexuality and penises not working. This really all feels like hard projection.
After typing that I read your other post, this is really good rage bait material, I almost got mad. Quite amusing Mike. I haven't been around here in years, but glad to get baited by a tripfag or whatever you faggots call it during my short stay.

>>81799372
Sorry he's not gay, if he was, I would have given you his number

>>81799438
You are so goddamn stupid it's unbelievable

>>81799438
you probably just need to make him more comfortable and stuff.
he probably is scared to fuck, i think honestly my first time i'll be super scared to fuck too so maybe thats it.
try without any fetish bullshit and maybe get high or something just lower his inhibition real good somehow. i was gonna say alcohol but i think that makes your dick weak idk

>>81799464
It would be so awesome if you told me why you thought that anon

>>81799496
>lower his inhibition
I don't think drugging him to have sex with him is a good idea. I feel like not only is that a danger to him, but a danger to me. Also I think that's a crime or like rape

>make him more comfortable
I had been doing with the fetish bullshit, because it's what seems to make him most receptive to having sex, incorporating it is the only time I've successfully got him to be intimate with me.
But maybe it's been putting a band aid on the issue, rather than doing anything to fix it. Now that I think about it, the more we did fetish stuff, the more he shied away from actual intimacy.
I'll try removing all the fetish stuff, and trying to slowly work towards regular intimacy. Great idea, thank you, I really appreciate it

>>81799591
i don't mean roofie him nona you're being obtuse, do a blunt rotation with him or drink some wine or something.
according to one of my sexhaver coworkers wine made him cum faster or maybe he said his orgasm was different i can't remember it was a stupid convo.
another guy said they smoked some weed and watched netflix then they fucked.
just a suggestion based on hearsay thoughbeit i know nothing about sex i didn't hear sex havers say or see on the hub so......

>>81799438
Are you retarded? Opie is talking about sexuality and penises. The disorder he suffers has to do with sexuality and penises.

Your heart projecting nerd and you should have picked a better opportunity because this one just made you look retarded

>>81799438
I don't know why you get mad. I took the symptoms and that is the diagnosis.

Is that upsets you I am sorry, that's on you and him. Projecting that anger on me has no cause.

You asked for help, I gave you the anawsrs honestly

You would know if I did rage bait because you would get very very upset.

>>81798326 (OP)
He didn't say that he needed help. Better that you can do leave him alone.

>>81799496
Here's rage bait

Ohhhhh poor babyyyyyyy
scared of pussy?
His little clit trembles and tries to hide every time he gets close to yours.
Its just so scary!
Poor babyyyyyyy
Being scared to fuck,
Your vagina is just so scary and to make it worse it's attached to a girl!
Like a real one
It's just like going to a rated R movie
But I don't think it's appropriate, PG-13 is the highest he can go unless you want to go to the theater holdings hand the entire time
But if he starts crying, you'll need to change him.
Pussies just so scary to him and sitting next to you
He pisses himself in fear
Faggot little beta bitch boi

>>81799496
>you probably just need to make him more comfortable and stuff.
I agree, he may need a pacifier and his blankie.

>>81799647
I know you don't mean roofie him, I just thought it was considered borderline rape to have sex with someone who is intoxicated. I don't know if I could live with myself knowing the only way I could get my bf intimate with me again is by having him chug a few glasses of wine first.
But I don't know, I'll see what he thinks. I've actually never been drunk before, nor have I ever seen him drunk, so honestly I don't know what it's like.

>>81799686
It's making me laugh a lot, the idea that someone reads "bf wont have sex with me" and goes "He must be an asexual closeted tranny who has ED" its like the type of shit you see on twitter. thank you anon, good stuff

>>81799735
I've been leaving him alone to do it his way for a year and a half now. I have my own needs in a relationship. If he can't seem to fix it himself, then I'm going to try to help him, and if I can't help him, then I'm going to have to re-evaluate if I can stay in a relationship that will have almost 0 intimacy. I'd probably would have said I'd break up immediately before I was in a relationship with him, but I love him so much I don't know if I could.

>>81799496
>get high
It make you dick weak and/or you won't want to fuck. Litle bit alco won't hurt.

>>81799775
it just mike you're probably a newfag,
but he's a ragebaiting faggot its fine he doesn't even believe the cunt words he's typing.
>. I don't know if I could live with myself knowing the only way I could get my bf intimate with me again is by having him chug a few glasses of wine first.
if he consents beforehand and you do it in an intimate setting you're both comfortable with and don't do too much it should be fine.
don't need to be wasted or anything.
make it like a little fun thing set the mood. if you guys fuck a couple times eventually you should work up to regular fucking at some point and maybe do your fetish stuff.
since you guys have worked together this long you might as well just do anything you can think of for as long as you possibly can
if not it might be over as they say.
i work construction too and have been splashed with some insane chemicals might be a part of it

>>81799823
>0 intimacy
What? He said that you return back to the intimacy used to have before. It's not 0.

>>81799823
If you want more say it him.

>>81799823
can you explain a bit more about his fetish please? So he wants women to be fully clothed?
Does he work out or do any kind of physical activity now?

>>81798326 (OP)
You might actually be ugly and he doesn't know how to show affection without turning things lewd.
Been through that, still sexchatted regularly though.
Are you a fatso?

Since you've pretty much rejected everything said here what did you want to hear op???

>>81799845
>it just mike you're probably a newfag,
Kind of a newfag, I just haven't been here in a long time. The only names I remember are Amy and this guy with Pizza in his name. But I like this mike guy, good stuff so far

>if he consents beforehand
Fair enough, I'll try it out, thank you anon

>splashed with some insane chemicals
Sorry to hear that, I hope you're alright. But he didn't have to deal with that, all he did really was dig a bunch of holes and move a lot of heavy stuff.

>>81799867
He said that he'd return to the intimacy we had before, but he didn't change. He still rejected me, still didn't come to me, all he would say is that he's not in the mood. So it's 0 sex, it's been 0 sex for the last 6 months or so, maybe longer.
>>81799937
He knows I want more, he just can't seem to do it.

>>81799941
>can you explain a bit more about his fetish please?
It's the thing catwoman wears, he likes the look/smell/feeling of it. He said he doesn't dislike nudity, but it's just like meh to him, he prefers the suit (but as I said before, this changed when he was out in the sun working).
>Does he work out or do any kind of physical activity now?
None. Awful sleep schedule, drinks caffeinated drinks all the time, eats junk food and sweets, etc. He is not leading a healthy lifestyle at this time. I don't know if it's affecting him, or it's his fears or such

>>81799944
No, I'm not ugly and I'm underweight. He's definitely attracted to me, he's a very blunt guy and told me he is, his eyes blow up like dinner plates whenever he looks at me as well as other physical reactions, and I've heard him say in private to others that he thinks I'm pretty. So being unattractive to him is not a concern.

>>81800089
legitimate woman moment
she wants to have another woman or even a man or even her own fucking boyfriend show up in the thread and say everything she thinks is correct. nothing else matters.

>>81798643
>Because I love him
You don't. Women can't love men.

Perfectly described a porn addict ngl, a ton struggle to actually feel attraction during actual sex due to them being addicted for so long...

>>81800089
??? I've only denied advice from the fags who gave retarded advice like saying he was gay or a closeted tranny or something else retarded.
I've actually gotten some helpful advice, saying it may be testosterone or some methods to try. I'm really satisfied with the advice I've gotten thus far, but I'm going to stick around, just in case there's anything else helpful.
>>81800114
See above faggot. Was I supposed to say "Yeah maybe he is gay, and a closeted tranny freak with a madonna whore complex.. so true.." Like what? Who do you people think you are? Twitter psychologists? And what the fuck do you mean
>say everything she thinks is correct
What do I think is correct? What do I think is wrong? I am just saying I'm having an issue, and if any men out there who go "Hey I've been in that spot before" to give any advice if they have any.

>>81800119
I'm sorry your mom never loved you

>>81800173
He used to struggle with it really bad before we started dating. He still looks at it now, as there's not much I can do for him, being in an LDR, so he's fine to look at only certain stuff as long as it's not real women. We used to be intimate just fine, his consumption of porn hadn't changed any, but just to be safe I asked him to stop using it for a few months. But it didn't change anything for him.
I don't think it's that, as evident that he was able to be intimate just fine previously, but more than anything, I don't want it to be that.

>>81800227
You know I'm right. Women cannot love men.

>>81799775
Yup Good luck with your limp dick pre-troon pussy free beta bitch boy.

>>81800235
What does it mean to love? What in your life did you love to a point where you realized what love is?

>>81799845
Here's the narco likes to LARP manipulating emotions and acting like he's different anons targeting each other to create harm and cruelty between them.

Kill yourself

>>81800227
Hm, was he a virgin before you? There is a whole fantasy surrounding how great sex is among severe porn addicts, so it would still sort of make sense if the magic just wears off and he realises it isn't as fulfilling as he imagined especially after all the dopamine from porn/online fantasies... Anyways, even if it's not porn addiction related he should seriously get a sex therapist because it most certainly sounds like a neurological issue of some kind atleast partially related to porn addiction, maybe something else triggered it but still. For now best to give him some space op, don't pressure him and focus on the non-intimate side of the relationship like cuddling etc.

>>81800113
So like a leather suit? Does he have any other fetishes he's into?
Maybe it really is something related to his testosterone levels. My bf also had a lower libido than me and working out really helped a ton. Especially leg exercises. But to be fair my bf always had a decent sex drive but I wanted to go 2-3 times a day rather than just 5 days a week, so it's not an exact comparison.
Have you tried suggesting he should start working out and eating healthier?
Even from a nonsexual standpoint it'd make sense, since a better lifestyle is necessary to lead a long happy life together.
If that doesn't work and you look attractive maybe he really is into men

>>81800227
Ur so fucking annoying I wouldn't be able to get it up either. And does he have the same issue with his other "girlfriends"?

>>81800293
>was he a virgin before you?
He was a virgin before me, and still is; we both are. We've never actually had sex before, just attempted once before he gave up quickly. Our intimacy is just everything besides penetrative sex.

> he realises it isn't as fulfilling as he imagined
I had think about it, but he really does enjoy the times we are intimate together. He's a brutally honest guy, more honest than he should be; but he is very adamant that he enjoys it in the moment, after the moment, and remanences fondly on it long after.

> after all the dopamine from porn
This does make me think of something, when we would have talks about this, trying to figure out why he can't seem to do it, he mentioned something akin to this. That he hates how long it takes for me to get ready for sex or taking pictures (taking an hour or two to prepare, put on make up, and get into the fetish gear); that he has short desires for sex, that he wants a quick dopamine rush, but when telling him I'd have to go without his fetish gear to give him that quick satisfaction he's looking for, he wasn't a fan of that idea. And while he's rejected me while I'm already in it, it could also be where his fear of performance comes in, that he fears that I put all that time and effort in, so he might feel like it's putting pressure on him to preform at his best. Thank you, you've given me a lot to think about.

>sex therapist
Unfortunately he would never be into therapy, especially something called "sex" therapy. I didn't even know that existed. But I appreciate the advice

>give him some space op, don't pressure him
I've been giving him space for over 6 months now with no progress. Nothing is changing. And can't cuddle with him either as we're apart. I'm sort of at a point where I need to see some progress or see if this is an issue that can't be fixed

>>81798326 (OP)
I can't understand the timeline but sounds to me like he's unwell. Physically and mentally.

>>81800327
>So like a leather suit? Does he have any other fetishes he's into?
Essentially, just a full body one. And I'd rather not get more detailed, unless you have a reason for why it's relevant
>Especially leg exercises
Any reason why that one specifically? Or why you think that?
>Have you tried suggesting he should start working out and eating healthier?
I'll give it a try, I've said it in the past, but maybe knowing that it could help his issue out, maybe it'll help him be more motivated to do so. Thank you for the recommendation
>If that doesn't work and you look attractive maybe he really is into men
I don't know how I look, but I know he's 100% attracted to me. Even discounting what he's said to me directly or to others privately, he's got all the physical signs of attraction; so it's no doubt to me that he's attracted to me. It's just some issue that seems to prevent him from acting on it.

But I'm happy to hear you were able to some improvement in your life in this regard

> This does make me think of something, when we would have talks about this, trying to figure out why he can't seem to do it, he mentioned something akin to this. That he hates how long it takes for me to get ready for sex or taking pictures (taking an hour or two to prepare, put on make up, and get into the fetish gear); that he has short desires for sex, that he wants a quick dopamine rush, but when telling him I'd have to go without his fetish gear to give him that quick satisfaction he's looking for, he wasn't a fan of that idea. And while he's rejected me while I'm already in it, it could also be where his fear of performance comes in, that he fears that I put all that time and effort in, so he might feel like it's putting pressure on him to preform at his best. Thank you, you've given me a lot to think about.

Honestly this alone should give you valid insight on his current mental state and how he views sex (which is very clearly porn-related and expectations, even short desires for sex is linked to how readily available his fetishes likely are on porn sites as well as how "well" the actors "perform" during those scenes). If he never wants to actually go to sex therapy, you two genuinely need a much more indepth talk on this as it's clearly not healthy, I won't suggest anything else as I don't want to sway the relationship between you two, but remember that it's your decision if you want to stick through the relationship with him or see this as a deal breaker. Hope your relationship the best, OP.

>>81798326 (OP)
This is both an odd and stupid situation. And it just comes off as fake

>>81800503
It's not odd, her boyfriend is autistic.

>>81798326 (OP)
did this chic seriously buy a whole-ass leather bodysuit to please an online bf who can't get it up?
she must be brown or chinese or sth, wth...

I like quite a bit of your traits

When things fall apart with him and you are alone
Hit me up

FromSunToMoon

>>81800445
I'm just wondering if he's maybe into the whole dominatrix thing and that's why he's so into the suit. Or maybe he could be one of those guys who fetishize porn addiction and not getting it up for real women, who get off to those censored pics
As for the leg exercises, it's just what I noticed personally. I also heard from gymbros thst heavy leg exercises lead to greater boosts in testosterone but I don't know how accurate that is. Eating healthy and working out are always a good idea though
I mean I get the physical signs make sense but words are pretty meaningless in that context if his actions don't back it up. Also sexuality is fluid, he could be into you but still more into men. Or he could be more into getting fucked than fucking even if he's straight... But for now I think the best idea is just to help him get healthy, cut back on porn and see if the same issues persist.
Aren't you exhausted though? Initiating all the time is so draining

>>81798326 (OP)
depends what he wants with fully dressed, a onsie PJ can be cute AF, for me pic related does more than any lingerie could.
question:
was he a virgin when you first slept together and it didn't work?
Because there is a high chance his confidence is somehow fucked regarding that issue.
You need to reassure him and make him believe that you truly love him and just want to spend time together either way, and you'd enjoy basically anything anyways as long as its with him.

>>81798326 (OP)
not going to dig through all that but you could try NOT giving him what he say he wants, keep him dressed but go full naked himself. flip a few of his muh mandatory fetishes on their heads and listen in on how he responds, and surprise him with some of his own reactions.
ultimately you have a relationship with him and not with his fetishes, so if you're not adding anything violent it's just O K to not take his word for his needs and go by your own judgement.
"just taking his word for it" definitelt doesn't work already!

>>81800584
*naked yourself

>>81800485
It's not only that he doesn't want to do therapy, but he can't for a multitude of reasons. I don't really know what to do if the issue is porn related. I already had him go off of porn for 3 months and it didn't change anything, I genuinely don't know what to do, or what he can even do. I appreciate your help and insight, I guess I'll have to talk to him about it and see where to go from there

>>81800524
He can get it up and I got it while he was still intimate with me.

>>81800546
>maybe into the whole dominatrix
Yeah he's into that sometimes as well, I know all of his fetishes; there isn't anything he is secretly hiding from me out of shame
>fetishize porn addiction and not getting it up for real women, who get off to those censored pics
Nah, not the case either, again, I know everything about him in this regard
>cut back on porn
Tried for 3 months and nothing happened
>into you but still more into men
When I first knew him as friends, years and years before we started dating, he was questioning if he was bi as we were still teenagers. Though he ended up realizing it was just because he watched too much porn, and when he stopped being a retarded coomer any remote attraction to men went away. Again, long before we dated or he had a crush on me, so he had no reason to lie
>Aren't you exhausted though?
Unbelievably. It's really taken a toll on my self esteem to be rejected all the time. It's why I'm nearing my breaking point. If there isn't any progress anymore, I'm going to have to reconsider if this is what I can deal with in life.

But yeah I'll have him try those leg exercises and try to get him to be healthier

>>81800113
>rejected me, still didn't come to me, all he would say is that he's not in the mood
>can't seem to do it
You can't change him. Try alco, if this doesn't work, nothing will. He is happy with the way things are and he is not going to do anything. Remember him about your desire.

>>81800508
>autistic
No such thing

>>81800630
>I already had him go off of porn for 3 month
No you didn't.

>>81800665
Yeah, how do you know he's not cranking it to porn or your pictures? He might be pornsexual.

>>81800563
>depends what he wants
Full leather catsuit
>was he a virgin
Still is, so am I, we never successfully had sex. We just tried once, he couldn't figure out how to get it in, and gave up.
>his confidence is somehow fucked
Yeah probably as he mentioned it, but even after he realized it, he hasn't been able to fix it
>You need to reassure him
Believe me when I say I have done every possible thing to reassure him, even before sex, I would say even if it doesn't work out or doesn't go as planned, I am happy just to be with him.
Thanks anon for the insight

>>81800584
It's a good suggestion, I appreciate it; but I'm not comfortable with that. He'd be the first person I'd ever shown myself fully naked to. If his reaction was uncaring or anything negative, I'd probably hang myself, genuinely. But it is a good thought

>>81800642
Thank you for the insight, perhaps he is just comfortable with the way things are. I'll be more direct that it's something I need

>>81800665
Are you saying you believe he was looking at porn anyways? I guess I have no way of knowing other than trusting him

>>81800679
I wish he was cranking it to my pictures, part of the thing is he doesn't ask for pictures anymore. I tried sending them without him asking, and he just said he appreciates them, but he's not in the mood so after a while I gave up

>>81800697
A healthy guy has to blow his load at least once a week so either he's physically sick or he's masturbating in secret.

>>81800716
No, he's definitely masturbating. When I heard he was doing it like 6 times a week, I told him to stop watching porn and to cut his jerking it to 1-2 times a week, he obliged. After 3 months of no change in being intimate with me, I stopped checking back in with him, so I'm sure he's probably reverted back to cranking it.
And to answer any questions as to why he does that, but doesn't do intimacy; he said it's just a stress relief and helps him focus when he gets distracted. That's where the mental block is, that's the issue I'm having.
He's attracted to me, he wants to have sex/sext with me, he can't bring himself to actually get intimate with me.

>>81800800
He's probably being truthful about the stress, dunno if I could be intimate with someone if I was stressed out. Probably the root of your problem.

>>81800630
Not just leg exercises though, I suggest general heavy lifts and make sure he doesn't skip leg days and eats somewhat healthily.
You sound quite young and as far as I understand you're not living together, so I'd be cautious about believing him when it comes to his porn usage. If it's an addiction it would be natural to want to hide it and that's easy if you don't live under the same roof. I'm bi myself and it's common to have shifts in attraction in genders over time. I've had years where i wasn't attracted to men at all. Maybe back then his attraction was waning and it could be back now.
He must have liked cock to some degree if he watched porn often enough to consider himself addicted. And you're sure he's not also into that sissy stuff? It's where submissive porn addicts into domination often end up in my opinion.
I don't believe any homosexual interest could completely go away and maybe he's just surpressing it. It's possible he's not even aware of his desires, so he wouldn't be lying. Just clueless.
Something is obviously up with him.
You really need to sit him down again and explain how much this is messing with you.
I really feel for you, I hope you can work this out. I also think if he really loves you he should care about you enough to fulfill your basic needs. You're not asking for anything impossible.

>>81800826
Yeah he's incredibly emotional immature in the sense that he doesn't know how to understand or deal with them. He's been working on it and making improvements, but this will be a long and slow journey.
There's some inner issue that he doesn't understand, know what it is, or how to deal with it.
I made this post hoping for any anons who may have any ideas what the issues could be, so I can talk to him about it, and see if it can give some better insight into the issue

>>81800697
>Still is, so am I, we never successfully had sex. We just tried once, he couldn't figure out how to get it in, and gave up.
never had sex myself but my brother told me it they basically had the same issue their first time and its normal.
Just encourage him to try again and it will work no doubt.
I still think he's self concious about it, failing to perform is a great anxiety for men, I'd say just start with hands first when you try next time.

>>81800867
>Yeah he's incredibly emotional immature in the sense that he doesn't know how to understand or deal with them
So he's also a narcissist. Lmfao

>>81798326 (OP)
>thread about nudity
>no nudes
POST YOUR NUDES
your bf doesn't like seeing you naked because you're prolly fat or something

Female nudity

>>81798326 (OP)
Ignore the schizoposts and the random catastrophizing posts they just jelly you seem to be a in real pickle though first suggest Viagra and see how he reacts to it then you can decide on a further course of action.

>>81803383
Nvm just read the thread Mike actually has an okay take for once. But honestly he just sounds depressed and low-libido is he on any antidepressants? That shit nukes your gonads regardless of gender lmao but also if you don't masturbate or regularly use your dick you can get blue balls or its harder to get aroused but once you get over that initial part its usually okay as long as you have regular sex. Should be fine unless they're on zoloft or something in which case it's completely over (unless they switch to a different antidepressant with different side effects)

>>81800867
>Yeah he's incredibly emotional immature in the sense that he doesn't know how to understand or deal with them. He's been working on it and making improvements, but this will be a long and slow journey.
>There's some inner issue that he doesn't understand, know what it is, or how to deal with it.
>I made this post hoping for any anons who may have any ideas what the issues could be, so I can talk to him about it, and see if it can give some better insight into the issue

Sounds like a really typical male autist whose parents didn't understand his disorder...autism is truly complicated. You seem kind with the right attitude and already well-versed on basic psychology already so I highly recommend reading this book to get a better understanding of autism...can be a bit intimidating since this book is a textbook but its not too technically and pretty approachable. Autistic people really have complicated upbringings if their parents weren't aware of it and treated them harshly normally and they way they process things can either lead to them shutting down (internalizing) or anger (tantrums).

You might not be able to help him...he might need an actual clinican/psychotherapist specializing in Autism Spectrum Disorder but if he doesn't feel comfortable and doesn't open up there's no hope...perhaps that where your role comes in.

This book is a good introduction I can offer a few more that's better for actually supporting someone with autism and trauma like personal accounts and stories but you need to be careful since ASD is very mysterious and even among cutting edge academics our understanding of it changed alot in the last 20 especially 10 years so don't read anything too old since it's probably very outdated.

Anyways, good luck anonette.

>>81798326 (OP)
He's gay lmao.

>>81803638
She wants wrong answers only
>>81803578
>typical male autist
So autists and npds don't have emotions? What else do they have in common?

>>81803916
>So autists and npds don't have emotions? What else do they have in common?
They both have emotions not having emotions is often associated with Anti Social Personality Disorder which is totally different way more fucked and extremely, extremely rare. What they have in common is the inability process or understand their emotions properly autists for neurological reasons and NPD for psychodynamic reasons, they are both mental illnesses that often present the exact same outward symptoms but totally different underlying diagnoses like the most common misdiagnosis ever e.g. Elliot Rodger clearly had NPD but was diagnosed with only Asperger's instead further complicated by the fact that many people have both like 40% of autists struggle with NPD at a certain point in their life, Chris-Chan being a good example.

Another very core thing that they have in common is a general alexithymia aka. emotional blindless they often delude themselves thinking that they don't feel emotion when in reality they do just lack the ability to properly understand it and how it influences their actions/decision making. Or they might fundamentally mistake one emotion for another like they might feel too much joy/get overstimulated and break something but freak out because they mistake it for anger.

Anyways autism and NPD are extremely complicated you just listed probably the two most elusive and mysterious disorders even modern psychopathology. It has a very steep Dunning-Kruger so unless you're a trained clinician you should be careful saying anything about ASD/NPD and you definitely should not start diagnosing random people on the internet with it...

Hope that clarifies some things.

>>81800348
as someone pointed out earlier in the thread, rage fucking OP may be the only way to get off with her