I never grew out of being edgy, I am an edgy 30 year old now. I still think that raiding is a fundemental human function that has been amputated from our social system. I still envision myself and the world in terms of videogames and anime, the edgy ones. I joined the military, but there was no war to go to. Everyone just blows their paycheck on women and alcohol. I just waited until my contract ended and left. I have tried stealing but there was no resistance, it was just free money that now sits in my desk drawer. I've had jobs, everyone just waits until they can leave and go home to indulge themselves. I've had girlfriend, you just make noises while they talk and indulge in things together. Real life feels fundementally wrong and not real at all. Its a cycle of addiction. I dont want to be an addict. I want a life or death survival scenario. Thats the natural mode of life for any creature.