>need outsourced structure and regiment in my life because I have poor discipline
>if there is no outside foundation giving me regiment I will just be a fat lazy piece of shit

>>82217551 (OP)
you need a tulpa gf
https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/81897684/

Life is largely fake and gay. I go to work more because of a sense of duty than money. I got crypto if I was really in a bind. Honestly I could probably turd world maxx and live the rest of my life if I liquidate everything and all in vtsax or VTI.
Structure is a spook. I have observed myself and it's somewhat remarkable how predict I am. Creature of habit. Retail therapy is a thing but I have reigned it in to just books as I enjoy reading. But if I got an e-reader I could probably pirate 90%of the stuff I read. It's just agriculture, philosophy, and religion.
I wish to live on a farm. I like meat but am lazy. If I were able to farm like I want I'd probably become vegetarian just because I am loathe to spend money and subsistence farming is so easy. I just need a few acres because I like trees and wild. If it's just food I could live on less than half an acre cultivated. Calories are way easier to get than people realize. But eating is painful for me as I have gi problems, so that probably affects my worldview. I'm content to get half my calories from alcohol, grapes being an obvious source. Potatoes and wheat fill the remaining bulk. The rest is just for taste, onion, garlic, carrot, celery, peppers, herbs, etc.

>>82217551 (OP)
thats why i joined the military even though i didnt want to, it was the only way i could throw myself into a system where i would be forced to perform