>>82843452 (OP)
I fucked up, anon
I don't do meditations but I went straight to ego deaths
My life has been one of pure suffering and I've gone through so many mental breaks. I put ego deaths in plural because I've genuinely gone through so many.
I can count em with both hands. I've reached that point where I've broken down everything; prejudice, inhibitions, social conditionings, every sort of wall pertaining to the self.
I genuinely think I've gone insane but... life goes on. My reality has shattered and I float through it all now.