>>82907575 (OP)
>All I ever did I did to make you proud tell me how proud you are TELL ME TELL MEEEEE!!!!!
>Base literally EVERYTHING off the operating principle that sacrifice means or should mean entitlements
>Don't get the reward because I believe I thought good will always come if I operate in that manner
>Resentment and envy breed leading to hostility or self harm
>Repeat.
Honestly I can respect some of that Eastern stuff. Being more apathetic or letting go is a bit more freeing than what I am doing.
>waaahh look at me look at me look how much I've much suffered or gave up I am now entitled to the reward.
It's taken me a lot of time to even identify the pattern of behavior within myself.
Oh also forgot one thing
>combine this with my extremely high level or neuroticism.
