Having a girlfriend makes me physically ill, especially at the beginning. I do better now, I am much calmer than before and care less, but I recently had a girlfriend that reset all of that for me. I became a little teenage with his first gf all over again and I blew it. I tried to keep myself in my calm corner and missed opportunities to put her in her place, and even gave in to her demands. All because she made me feel like I had a knot in my stomach. We would spend long periods of time apart due to our circumstances of meeting, it was semi-LDR, and most of the time I would have a lot of anxiety no amount of working out, working on creative projects, business meetings, long work hours could help me avoid. I even hung out with friends, girls, guys, whatever. I STILL waited and longed for her texts. It sucks because it wasn't like this in my previous relationship. That last girl gave me no reason to guess/be anxious but this more recent girl did.

In the end, if your gut reacts in this way that affects how you act/react, is it even worth it to stay with a girl? At the first sign of anxiety, should I just cut her off to avoid embarassment? I became clingy, needy, something I've never done since a relationship I had over a decade ago.

To my defense, I lost my mom and job and was homeless for a time.