>grow up socially isolated
>have wealthy family and good looks due to mom having worked as a model but have to learn everything on my own including tying my shoelaces or basic hygiene
>form opinions and beliefs and mannerisms different from everyone around me
>not religious like my parents, not tied to cultural backgrounds like my peers, not aligned with the political or social beliefs of anyone I know and have very different ideas regarding sex and love
>can never ever make attempts at being myself to anyone, even remote hints at it have ended horribly for me and people around me in the past

I don't know what to do. I sometimes drop bits and pieces of myself on this website as a coping mechanism but I wish there was someone I could be honest to about everything, I'm tired of having had to lie for the past decade non-stop.

I'm so so so fucking lonely. Gonna try sleeping it off.