The true story behind the weird way I type is simple. My friend Stu was a defense contractor who would travel from Atlanta where we lived, to Huntsville Alabama once every 30 days, and he stayed in the facility and slept in the facility for 30 days while he worked on Cruise missile technology

And one day he came over to visit My girlfriend and I, and he told us about this new interesting thing they were all using called The darknet

And he said they were encouraging each other to bring artists and musicians and writers in so it would be more interesting

And he hooked up my commodore Amiga to the darknet

This was long before they called it the internet

And I was going to some of the very first bulletin board style and internet relay chat sites

AND IT WAS SO FUCKING BORING!!!!!!!!!!

IT WAS MIND-NUMBINGLY BORING!!!!!!!!

And I decided to start being disruptive to make it more interesting

.............and that
........................... is where
........................................... I learned
That simply TYPING WEIRDLY made
certain control freaks angry as shit

So I've been doing it ever since