I hate it but I think I need to accept that Maria is may not even be here despite some post feeling like they are her and having details that only she would know. But because she has never straight up said it's her I need to accept that we're not any further in getting better and we were before and we're completely cut off and she's not communicating. I hear her in post and feel like she's lurping as a form of communication because narratively the responses communicate that to me and it is common with what she is suffering from that she was communicate like that because it feels safe. But even if it is her there's been enough time and she has not opened to me with opportunity to heal. Despite what I want and how I feel she has not been open to it. I added her on Instagram again and she denied the request plus what her status with that guy leads me to believe that she broke her promises to me, betrayed us in that way, give her first to someone else. And that breaks my heart. So I shouldn't give her faithfulness and loyalty if that is how it is be reciprocated from her.