>>82087285
>always expect something equally bad to happen
It's just paranoia. Ignore the real and present patterns in your life.

>looking to be a security guard or something like that?
Currently am security. Trying to break into Law Enforcement. Hoping to make SWAT someday.

>goes to show you guys are great friends!
Used to be. Shit happens.

>not feeling really great at the moment and i kind of just want to turn into ash.
I fully understand that. Don't know what screws are loose in me but something is very wrong unfortunately.