Anonymous
8/15/2025, 8:43:22 PM
No.150241303
8/15/2025, 8:43:22 PM
No.150241303
Good evening, Twinkazzo 47.
Your next contract takes you to Lisbon, where a covert summit is underway between senior architects of the Neo-Atlantic Compact, an informal alliance aiming to rebrand Atlanticism as a lifestyle brand, complete with merchandise drops, curated playlists, and deeply neoliberal "healing retreats."
The venue: an exclusive beta event of Hello Kitty Island Adventures: IRL Edition, hosted aboard a decommissioned NATO submarine, now repurposed as a floating Sanrio-themed resort.
Your targets:
Ambassador Clive Rennox: Former oil lobbyist turned "empathy strategist." He's using the game's emotional leveling system to test NATO-aligned loyalty metrics under the guise of self-care.
Dr. Felina Dupont: Behavioral economist and lead designer of "Friendship as Foreign Policy", a gamified doctrine currently undergoing stealth deployment in multiplayer servers.
Hello Kitty: Or rather, the AI persona currently running her social media accounts. She's no longer just a mascot, she’s a fully sentient soft power weapon, and she knows who you are.
Mission Objectives:
- Infiltrate the submarine as an invited "Kawaii Geopolitical Influencer."
- Disrupt the Atlanticist narrative embedded in the game’s story mode.
- Eliminate all targets with zero detection.
- Escape undetected (preferably via swan-shaped paddleboat)
Optional Objective:
-Collect all 12 limited-edition My Melody CryptoCharms. ICA believes they contain encrypted diplomatic briefings.
Intel Notes:
You’ll find a concealed outfit in the gift shop, a modified Sanrio staff uniform lined with ballistic gel and sequins. Keep a low profile, maintain your cover, and remember: your charm stat is maxed out, but your enemies are still vulnerable to silence and subtlety.
Good luck, Twinkazzo.
Your next contract takes you to Lisbon, where a covert summit is underway between senior architects of the Neo-Atlantic Compact, an informal alliance aiming to rebrand Atlanticism as a lifestyle brand, complete with merchandise drops, curated playlists, and deeply neoliberal "healing retreats."
The venue: an exclusive beta event of Hello Kitty Island Adventures: IRL Edition, hosted aboard a decommissioned NATO submarine, now repurposed as a floating Sanrio-themed resort.
Your targets:
Ambassador Clive Rennox: Former oil lobbyist turned "empathy strategist." He's using the game's emotional leveling system to test NATO-aligned loyalty metrics under the guise of self-care.
Dr. Felina Dupont: Behavioral economist and lead designer of "Friendship as Foreign Policy", a gamified doctrine currently undergoing stealth deployment in multiplayer servers.
Hello Kitty: Or rather, the AI persona currently running her social media accounts. She's no longer just a mascot, she’s a fully sentient soft power weapon, and she knows who you are.
Mission Objectives:
- Infiltrate the submarine as an invited "Kawaii Geopolitical Influencer."
- Disrupt the Atlanticist narrative embedded in the game’s story mode.
- Eliminate all targets with zero detection.
- Escape undetected (preferably via swan-shaped paddleboat)
Optional Objective:
-Collect all 12 limited-edition My Melody CryptoCharms. ICA believes they contain encrypted diplomatic briefings.
Intel Notes:
You’ll find a concealed outfit in the gift shop, a modified Sanrio staff uniform lined with ballistic gel and sequins. Keep a low profile, maintain your cover, and remember: your charm stat is maxed out, but your enemies are still vulnerable to silence and subtlety.
Good luck, Twinkazzo.