>>16719677I will do my best to be as honest as I can coming from my experience. I also do not claim to be some hyper intelligent sperg because I wouldn't be here if I was. Just past the bellcurve type shit.
For example, if you are a person who has a strong internal monologue and have high spacial / abstract reasoning you tend to overthink or have analysis paralysis / self doubt due to being aware of the Dunning Krueger curve etc. Now place yourself in a position where you are stuck due to external factors such as an arbitrary distinction between a junior electrical engineer and an applied physicist (in my experience and research background, my physics prof basically told me to learn to be an electrical engineer if I ever wanted to see the fruits of my labor as a physics nigga). I am very frustrated at the fact that I am gate kept by a jewish/boomer cabal professional designation authority (APEGA) to do jobs that have nothing to do with safety stamping or other official stamping simply because I'm not an engineer by degree (even though both are bachelor's of science).
I can't chimp out and throw away my life, mediocre job, gf etc and find the licensing board members houses. I can't just "work harder" and "do more" in the moment, best I can do is consulting pertaining embedded systems architecture but that requires at least half a decade with an impressive portfolio that generated income. I can't go back to university because I need the job to pay off current student loans. Time is passing but not fast enough to speedrun macro goals that simply are time gated.
What to do? Enter weed. It effectively numbs me to the torture that is my internal monologue and pattern recognition. It's a way to turn yourself off for the night instead of spending the entire dog walk thinking about how your boss is an immoral kike. For me it's a means to be complacent and tank "putting in your time", and come to terms with things that are out of my control as a control craving person.