1.19
When the apocalypse comes, there will be two kinds of people:

Those who scream "WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!"

And those who reply: "first."

Be the latter.

1.20
The Master was shown a post with 10,000 upvotes and asked: "Is this the pinnacle of discourse?"

He responded by creating 9931 bot accounts to downvote it to exactly 69, then vanished for three weeks. When questioned upon return, he simply said: "Perfectly balanced, as all things should be."

This is the Way.

1.21
There exists a sacred paradox:
The more effort you put into appearing effortless, the more obvious your desperation becomes.

The solution?
Genuine effort disguised as shitposting.
The advanced solution?
Genuine shitposting disguised as effort.
The final solution?
Abandon all solutions and post a screenshot of this text with the caption "tl;dr"

1.22
A student once asked: "How do I know when my post is truly transcendent?"

The Master handed him a USB drive containing every deleted 4chan thread from 2008 and said: "When you can no longer distinguish your work from these artifacts, you will have your answer."

The student was never seen again, though occasionally, on quiet nights, old-timers swear they see his tripcode appear briefly in /b/ before vanishing like a glitch in the Matrix.

1.23
The Threefold Path of Engagement:
1. The Bait (so obvious even NPCs take it)
2. The Reverse Bait (so subtle even you don't know if you're serious)
3. The Meta Bait (where the entire comments section becomes performance art)

All lead to the same destination: A locked thread with 500+ comments and no resolution.