>>49730170
I have been in a similar situation and had a similar mentality to you.
Never give up and look forward to it, no matter how many years it takes you, if you wish hard enough and persevere you will accomplish your goal. Hoping for the best, you are the kind of future kig(s) I wish to see more out there.

What country/region are you? you could always interact w/ kigs who are local to you, ask for help and what not. wishing you the best.