>Steps away to do the dishes
>Some guy becomes convinced the person arguing with him is me

For the record, I do think that short of elaborate corporate espionage you're not going to find business rivals inside your own bakery. If a goddamn solar manages to get to the point where large scale corporate espionage rather than a rival sending assassins to their home is a problem without buying more defensive charms then they didn't deserve to be a solar in the first place.