“They say if you smoke weed at exactly 3:33 AM, open YouTube, and search for “Trinity Faith Isaac Miriam Remix”
>???
?
…
>”So I did it. Of course I did it.”
>”I was two bong rips in, wearing my oversized anime hoodie, staring into the void of my dual monitors like they were portals to something holier than unemployment. I hit play. Static. A low hum. Gregorian chants autotuned through what sounded like a broken microwave. Then it happened”
>A high-pitched celestial scream burst through my headphones.
>Not like a horror scream.
>It was God.
>And He was pissed.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
>”YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO HEAR THIS.”

I tried to pause it. Wouldn’t stop. My screen began displaying biblical verses in Comic Sans, spinning like a cursed Windows 95 screensaver. Then a pop-up appeared:
“Install the Holy DPirit?”
Yes / No / Revelations

I clicked “Yes.”

My weed turned to communion wafers. My carpet started bleeding stigmata. My cat spoke in tongues. I looked in the mirror and saw a second me behind me, but he was wearing a mitre and dabbing.

The remix reached the drop: a choir screaming “MIRIAAAAMMMMM” while breakcore drums simulated divine judgment. At that exact moment, my third eye opened and immediately regretted it.

That’s when I saw Him.

God.
Made entirely of glass and MIDI notes.
He leaned in and whispered
>“You weren’t chosen, but you were…online.”
Then everything went black.
I woke up outside, wrapped in pages from the Book of Enoch, holding a USB drive labeled “Holy Spirit v2.0 BETA.”

I haven’t smoked since. But sometimes, when my computer idles, I still hear it —
the remix.
The scream.
The drop.

Beware the Holy DPirit. It auto-updates.

Got
Gpt
2 gg (2l.) 2fake?
,,.,,,
Did I guess right u oujia N-wad?
Now THAT’s how a triforce works har gar yar

Pirates be wary of the beast of pirates bay