my male friends and i are as close as can be
and i hope no matter where i go, they stay with me

we hang out a lot, we get along well
we have much the same thoughts and time with them swell

but when i think about a soulmate that i'll spend my life with
it's gotta be a woman cause that's how you get a wife and shit but

all the people i could hang out with for life
are people who unfortunately i can't make my wife

because they wouldn't fulfill my sexual urges

wish i could fuck my male friends
wish i could fuck my male friends

but i don't like men no i don't like men

wish i could fuck my male friends
wish i could fuck my male friends

but i don't like men no i don't wanna fuck them

why's it gotta be a woman that's my life partner
i've never met a woman that i got along with better
than my male friends
man i tell ya it sucks!

if we were just gay then we could just fuck

sex is intimacy that is built into our genes
but i've yet to meet a woman that's the person of my dreams
but i know plenty of men that i would gladly fuck
but i happen to be straight huh isn't that my luck

oh here comes the twist where it turns out i'm gay
no there's no twist i mean what i say

i am very straight i just can't see men in that way
if i could then i'd already be happily married

wish i could fuck my male friends
wish i could fuck my male friends
but i don't like men no i do not like men
wish i could fuck my male friends