>smoke a gram of weed a day
>minimum 6 beers a day, every day, before work, during work, after work
>min 1 pack of cigarettes a day
>pop a 5mg benzo at 5 am so the work day goes by faster
>do coke every other week
>one DUI
>one public disturbance
>one assault and battery
>am 30
I'm beyond fucked guys. Stop drinking.

I think I hate women.
Ever since my ex of 5 years cheated on me last year, I just can't shake this disdain off.
I have 60 bodies, I've been the romantic type and the side piece more than once, but now suddenly nothing.
I'm 32 years old, all my friends are either in jail or worse, married, and now I wonder what to do with my life.
I have girls talk to me and approach me when I go bar hopping, but I just brush them off as if my libido is gone.
My therapist says it's a sign of maturity, but honestly I don't think so. As of late I've gotten deep into alc and coke abuse, but not to the point where it impedes on my family life or well being.
What do? I hate casual sex. I hate dating. I don't actually like women unless they cross their legs, but even then if it happens too sudden I just ghost them since they're whores.

I wish I was my normal happy go lucky self from a few years ago.