The point of no return, and the impossible test:
Vulnerability to being compromised.
When you are approached for recruitment to, let's call them "Real Organizations" ITT, you will be tested with temptation. Allowing them to compromise you will result in subversion, you will be redirected to a position where you will not be able to harm them but can be used by them. If you refuse you will be denied and smothered, attacked psychologically until you desist or are incomprehensible to anyone you try to explain your state of being to.
The way through must be to demonstrate a quality that cannot be resisted, you need to tempt them. I made it passed this test when I was young but I revealed my true intentions under interrogation. I was not even aware I was being interrogated.
This is why a modern martyr, or human missile, must be exceptional. A master of deception and cunning. If you are not of these qualities do not even try, you will only be putting yourself in danger.