youre ideal self is just an idea you keep in the back of your mind, to make yourself feel better.
while you write off your lack of control, recklessness, thoughtless, and reactionary behavior as 'mistakes'.

you might think yourself a spiritualist, or occultist,
but youre no better than a christian, begging 'something else' to take the wheel.
and then call possessed, thoughtless behavior 'mistakes'.

you become an occultist, when you merge your ideal self, with who you are in the flesh.
thats the difference between me an the rest of you.
i walk the talk. i practice what i preach.

thats why i keep calling ALL of you, larps.
this IS just escapism while you blissfully float away in a drugged up dream you call a life.

the truth is
you figured out that merely pretending to try
produces the same dopamine release,
so you stopped trying all together.

https://voca.ro/18pliYctwBws