So I tried to reach out to her yesterday and it went horrible
She said she doesnt hate me for asking her out but cant let it go despite it being months later
I told her I wanted better closure with her and wanted to apologize for my overall shitty behavior and told her I struggle with expressing myself which she appreciated but still couldnt accept my apology and told me to accept her wishes to never contact her again
I deleted her number and now I will finally move on
As selfish as it sounds I needed to go out on my own terms
I tried to save her but modern women are so messed up its impossible
Hopefully I will find someone someday
Hated how things ended between us its all my fault