My email provider I had since the nineties went out of business. It was apparently the last one on earth not to require you already have an email address in order to sign up for an email address. Or a cell phone. Don't want one of those goddamn things listening to the conversations around me.

>you VILL vear ze ankle monitor

Fuck that shit.

And of course, email address is a mandatory field on job applications. Guess I gotta find an Amish community to live in or something.