It's foggy and I am not sure why?

I don't believe in afterlife I just feel like this is it and not to expect more.

I don't have a goal currently in mind. At this point I'm just working my shitty construction electrical job where I despise the co-workers with a burning passion.

Apart from that it's just a lot of weed and Whiskey along with being on the 4chan too much and playing Cyberpunk 2077.