Confucius says "it's not gay if the balls don't touch, but if it's a girl's balls then it's gay if they don't touch yours"
Sun Tzu said "All warfare is based on deception, when you are strong make yourself look weak, when you are weak make yourself look strong, and the size of her dick is deceptively small"
Thomas Aquinas said "A woman without a cock, is like an angel without wings"