>18y/o 8mo hrt twinkhon
>5’9, very small frame from starving myself for years to avoid masculinizing
>in college, survive off instant ramen, don’t leave my room for days, failing class, spend my small allowance on cheap drugs
>sent to psych ward at end of semester

>one month of being forcefed later, discharged to an inpatient program for chronic eating disorders
>only option near me was an all female program
>its not gonna be that bad, right?

>i open the door. a whiteboard with cute drawings on my right. a table with plushies and crochet supplies on my left.
>in the next room over, i hear girls chattering. it reminds me a lot of how my sister talks with her friends, a language i tried and endlessly failed to understand and replicate
“you must be anon! it’s nice to meet you! just fill out these forms for me.”
>its almost too much. a house full of the people i so desperately wish i was like, yet hopelessly out of reach of being
“before i go anon, can i ask you for your pronouns?”
>fuck
>what do i do
>im such a fucking joke
>i don’t fucking belong here

>i spend my days sitting in the corner, waiting for my discharge date. nobody wants to talk to me
>and what would i even talk about. i don’t know anything about lady gaga. or sororities. or what day of your period you’re on
>but gradually, i start to open up. one day at a time. every day that passes where im trapped living with 10 girls my age i start to assimilate
>every day, i learn about their world. their favorite prestige makeup brands. taylor swift concerts. their crushes from work. tv shows, hobbies
>one month later
>the girls say i’m easy to talk to, fun to gossip with. we talk late at night about our lives, we cry together
>i feel like i belong
>its nice

>i reach my discharge date after 6 weeks
>i subconsciously hug my girl friends the day i get back
>my voice sounds different
>men aren’t funny anymore

i got sent to hsts conversion camp